/akg/

/akg/
Okaeri, Dokutah
/akg/ - Arknights General
Founded 1 May 2020 Manager Dokutah Owner Hypergryph IRL manager BigOlBrainlet !!FdkNaxmlSdM Team colors Chat color 171727 Babel Black Ranking 54 Highest rank 54 (29 June 2020) Lowest rank 54 (29 June 2020) Top scorer ZERO SANITY (5) Top assister ZERO SANITY, Horse Pussy, Donkey, Hantingu Hajimeru (2) Captain ZERO SANITY Website /akg/ - Arknights General Nickname Guardknights, Loginknights
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY 2 2 3 7 28.57%
GF GA GD 14 19 -5
Biggest win /akg/  3–2  /r6g/ December 4, 2020 Biggest defeat /pmmm/  5–2  /akg/ June 7, 2020 First match /pmmm/  5–2  /akg/ June 7, 2020
/vg/ League Appearances 1 (First in /vg/ League 14) Best result 2nd, /vg/ League 15
Team music
Anthem Burn Me to the Ground Victory Anthem Speed of Light Goal horn The Day is Mine ZERO SANITY's Goal horn Doctor Dancing ZERO SANITY's Hat Trick horn AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA etc. Donkey's Goal horn Video of Amiya Only Calling the Doctor
Kits

Arknights is a chink gachashit mobile actually >fun tower defense game that takes place in a world full of edgy kemonomimi, angels with guns, Russians, and literal devils and vampires, all infected with rock cancer, and it's up to you as the Doctor to try and cure them of the plague. Allegedly. You spend a lot more time murdering infected people than actually curing them.

/akg/ meanwhile spends most of its time being huge fucking brainlets that don't know who to E2 next and still can't clear TR-15, at least until they reach zero sanity and start screaming about not being able to play for longer than 15 minutes and spamming random lyrics for hours.

Roster

No. Position Player 10   GK BLOCK CERO 6   CB Skadoo 5   CB Chenfromarknights 99   CB Jessicat 44   DMF HellaCHAD 2   DMF Cutest Cripple 67   RMF LappGOD 89   LMF Hantingu Hajimeru 23   AMF Donkey 0   AMF ZERO SANITY 3   SS WA CHING WA CHING

No. Position Player 79   CB Pixiv ID 79284449 41   CB Poca 51   CB Operation Barrenwomb 68   CB Jetpackbro 59   CB Red Katana Bro 18   CB GAOOO 7   DMF ONIgiri! 20   DMF Horse Pussy 56   DMF LA GOBLINA 14   DMF Be Racist 8   DMF KO KO DA YO~ 9   DMF APPURU PAI

Resting in Dorms

No. Position Player 1   CB I Never Asked For This 11   CB What's His Name Again? 69   CB Retardbro... 7   CB Stop Sending Clue 7 75   CB 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD 13   CB >african doctors 14   RB Loginknights

Exports

Aesthetics	Audio	Tactical
VGL15 Friendlies Aesthetics VGL14 Aesthetics Export	/alg/ VGL15 Friendlies Audio Export /domg/ VGL15 Friendlies Audio Export VGL14 Audio Export	/alg/ VGL15 Friendlies Tactical Export /domg/ VGL15 Friendlies Tactical Export VGL14 Tactical Export

Match History

Official Matches

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers
June 7th, 2020	/pmmm/	/vg/ League 14	2-5 L	45+1' ZERO SANITY  68' Donkey
June 13th, 2020	/gfg/	/vg/ League 14	0-3 L
June 19th, 2020	/drg/	/vg/ League 14	3-4 L	29' ZERO SANITY  42' 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD (Assist: BLOCK CERO)  82' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: GAOOO)  90+5' ZERO SANITY (Assist: WA CHING WA CHING)
November 22nd, 2020	/llsifg/	/vg/ League 15	3-3 D	19' Horse Pussy  62' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: ZERO SANITY)  82' Donkey (Assist: ZERO SANITY)
November 28th, 2020	/fgog/	/vg/ League 15	0-0 D
December 4th, 2020	/r6g/	/vg/ League 15	3-2 W	18' Hantingu Hajimeru (Assist: Donkey)  24' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: Horse Pussy)  53' ZERO SANITY (Assist: Horse Pussy)
December 12th, 2020	/drag/	/vg/ League 15	3-2 W (a.e.t.)	54' Donkey (Assist: Hantingu Hajimeru)  90+0' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: Donkey)  114' ZERO SANITY (Assist: Hantingu Hajimeru)

Unofficial Matches

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers
September 20th, 2020	/domg/	/vg/ League 15 Friendlies	4-3 W	26' HellaCHAD (Assist: Donkey)  63' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: Mofumofu)  68' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: Donkey)  73' Sad Fat Rich Cat (Assist: ZERO SANITY)
September 27th, 2020	/alg/	/vg/ League 15 Friendlies	1-0 W (a.e.t.)	94' WA CHING WA CHING (Assist: Donkey)

Team Art

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  BLOCK CERO blocking zero out of five shots, VGL14 vs. /pmmm/

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  ZERO SANITY getting /akg/'s first goal ever, VGL14 vs. /pmmm/

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  Donkey getting /akg/'s second goal, VGL14 vs. /pmmm/

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  BLOCK CERO, who actually blocked four shots, against /gfg/, VGL14 vs. /gfg/

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  Fanart of Matoimaru

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  Anon cheering on his wife VGL14 vs. /gfg/

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  /vg/ League 14 Wooden Spoon forged in the fires of defeat by a master craftsman

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  Drawing of Jessica celebrating her winning goal in a friendly against /domg/ /vg/ League 15 Friendlies

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  WA CHING WA CHING celebrating his goal against /llsifg/, VGL15 vs. /llsifg/

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  WA CHING WA CHING presenting Doctor his goal against /r6g/, VGL15 vs. /r6g/

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  Drawings in celebration of /akg/'s first ever official win, VGL15 vs. /r6g/

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  The team celebrating /akg/'s 3-2 victory over /r6g/, VGL15 vs. /r6g/

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  Fanart of APPURU PAI and Mostima

Team Awards

VGL Awards

• 

  /vg/ League 14 Wooden Spoon

• 

  /vg/ League 14 Best General Aesthetics

• 

  /vg/ League 14 Biggest Spaghetti Moment - 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD's Own Goal vs. /drg/

Records

• /gfg/  v.  /akg/ set the new VGL record for highest attendance at 587 during the group stage of VGL14
• /fgog/  v.  /akg/ became the first /vg/ League match to have 0 shots on target during the group stage of VGL15

Team History

Episode 00: Prologue

/akg/ was formed on the evening of May 1, 2020. In preparation for the upcoming /vg/ League 14, much debate was had over the team logo and composition. Eventually 23 operators were selected, and /akg/ was ready to make their /vg/ League debut.

Episode 01: /vg/ League 14

Group I Match 1 vs. /pmmm/ With much anticipation and hype built up over the preceding month, /akg/ took the field in their official debut against the lesbians of /pmmm/. Unfortunately, /pmmm/ got off to a fast start as /akg/'s offense was left anemic, with /pmmm/ scoring twice near the end of the first half. However, the efforts of ZERO SANITY and Donkey were able to pull /akg/ back to a 2-2 tie. This was the peak of the match, however, as /pmmm/ broke /akg/'s defense with three goals in seven minutes. /akg/'s first ever match concluded 2-5. Group I Match 2 vs. /gfg/ [REDACTED] Group I Match 3 vs. /drg/ After two poor performances, /akg/ was already knocked out of the tournament, so the final match against /drg/ was a matter of pride. The offense (except Donkey) started off better than the previous two matches, actually being able to form strings of passes. However, /drg/ was able to take a defensive error by 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD and turn it into a goal. This goal was quickly canceled out by ZERO SANITY scoring a precise shot, taking advantage of /drg/'s own defensive error. Screams of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA filled the stands. A slow first half was coming to a close when the unimaginable happened. BLOCK CERO, already debuffed by an enemy Agent, activated her skill. She kicked the ball directly into 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD's bag, and it ricocheted into the net. At the start of the second half, Donkey missed another opportunity. Following this, /drg/ scored again, bringing the score to 1-3. Switching tactics, /akg/ opted for a more attacking style of play. This resulted in an eventual goal, with GAOOO finding WA CHING WA CHING to halve /drg/'s lead. After another couple of mistakes by Donkey, /drg/ was able to score on a counter. With the game in stoppage time and the score 2-4, /akg/ decided to go for Risk 26 and threw five operators forward. After a save off a kickoff shot by ZERO SANITY, it looked like these tactics were for naught. However, a key tackle by No Thoughts Head Empty followed by an incisive pass from WA CHING WA CHING resulted in another ZERO SANITY goal. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAs filled the stands for one last time in this tournament, and the match concluded 3-4. VGL 14 Epilogue Despite a valiant performance against /drg/, other results on the final matchdays went against /akg/, and /akg/ finished with the wooden spoon as the team in the tournament with the least amount of points. However all was not for naught. BLOCK CERO's tactical own goal was able to give /akg/ an award for Spaghetti Moment of the Tournament, and the team's overall aesthetics on their debut won Aesthetics of the Tournament. With more time, hype, and experience on their side, /akg/ now looks forward to /vg/ League 15, hoping that a new tournament will bring better fortune.

Episode 02: /vg/ League 15

Friendlies Following the poor fortunes at /vg/ League 14, /akg/ arrived into the new divegrass season with a renewed sense of vigor. To welcome the new competition to take place friendlies were scheduled against fellow zero sanity merchants /domg/ and /akg/'s coomer cousins /alg/. The friendly against /domg/ started as with VGL14, with /domg/ jumping out to a 3-1 first half lead. The sounds of women being trampled by elephants was deafening. However 3 successive goals in ten minutes, led by WA CHING WA CHING and capped off with substitute Sad Fat Rich Cat, allowed /akg/ to claim their first victory, if unofficial. The match closed with a chorus of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. The friendly against /alg/ was less eventful despite the purported rivalry. Little happened in either half of regulation, save for a clutch BLOCK CERO save on a breakaway EH?SEX? in the dying minutes of the second half. The lone goal came in the opening minutes of extra time. A quick series of passes between ZERO SANITY, KO KO DA YO~, LA GOBLINA, and Donkey resulted in the ball being placed at the feet of an open WA CHING WA CHING, who placed the ball into the corner. /akg/ concluded their friendlies with a perfect record. Prologue Multiple months had passed since the last /vg/ League, and as such new operators needed to be deployed while old ones needed to rest in the dorms. The final results of the squad building gave new team slots to Pixiv ID 79284449, ONIgiri!, Horse Pussy, Poca, Be Racist, Operation Barrenwomb, and Red Katana Bro. Stalwart defender I Never Asked For This, as well as What's His Name Again?, Retardbro..., Stop Sending Clue 7, 8*7500 = 1 Million LMD, >african doctors, and Loginknights were allowed to rest up in the dormitories. LappGOD was promoted to a Silver Medal while Hantingu Hajimeru, Jessicat, Chenfromarknights, and Skadoo changed skills to better reflect their positions within /akg/. The team was now prepared for the challenges of /vg/ League 15 and awaited the coming draw.

Team Statistics

Outfield

Player	Caps	Goals	Assists	Yellow Cards	Red Cards	Playing Time (Minutes)	Average Rating
ZERO SANITY	3	3	0	0	0	270	6.5
Donkey	3	1	0	0	0	270	6.17
WA CHING WA CHING	3	1	1	0	0	270	6.17
Mofumofu	3	0	0	0	0	270	5.5
HellaCHAD	3	0	0	1	0	270	5.67
LappGOD	2	0	0	0	0	87	5.25
Jetpackbro	1	0	0	0	0	68	5.5
What's His Name Again?	1	0	0	0	0	90	5.5
I Never Asked For This	3	0	0	0	0	270	5.5
No Thoughts Head Empty	2	0	0	0	0	91	5.5
Retardbro...	1	0	0	0	0	65	5.5
Stop Sending Clue 7	0	0	0	0	0	0	N/A
8*7500 = 1 Million LMD	2	Own Goal	By BLOCK CERO	0	0	180	5.5
>african doctors	0	0	0	0	0	0	N/A
APPURU PAI	2	0	0	0	0	92	5.25
Loginknights	1	0	0	0	0	22	6.0
Cutest Cripple	3	0	0	0	0	70	5.33
LA GOBLINA	1	0	0	0	0	67	5.0
KO KO DA YO~	1	0	0	0	0	68	6.0
GAOOO	2	0	1	0	0	48	6.0
Shut the **** Up	1	0	0	0	0	65	5.5
Sad Fat Rich Cat	1	0	0	0	0	67	6.0

BLOCK CERO

Player	Caps	Saves	Saves Per Game	Average Rating
BLOCK CERO	3	9	3	5.67