Congratulations /k/! | ||
Winners of the 2024 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
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Revision as of 04:45, 6 July 2023
This is the detailed roster page for /k/.
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
Legend
Rank | Medal Equivalent |
---|---|
Gold Captain | |
Gold | |
Silver | |
Non-Medal | |
Keeper |
Starters
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Position | Rank |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
ZERGFACE | Goal Poacher | When Chinese actor Wang Baoqiang gave his best war face in the series "Soldiers Sortie", the resulting wide-eyed and crazed stare was quickly found to be exploitable. Owing to the already memetic Starcraft (which all Asians play) tactic of the Zerg Rush, the meme gained its name. It is common for /k/ommandos to shoop "Zergface" into all sorts of military or other weapon related (or even unrelated) scenarios for comedic result. | SS | ||
CHEEKI BREEKI | Fox in The Box | A reference to a popular saying in the S.T.A.L.K.E.R. series of vidya games, spoken often by Bandits. The full expression combines a nursery rhyme style saying with the slav equivalent of "King me!" to form a declaration which figuratively announces the advantage one would have over another in a situation. Outside the game, it is most frequently said without any understanding or allusion to this concept. A "Cheeki Breeki" can also be used to reference someone who is, for instance, slav as fuck in a derogatory or respectful manner. Formerly a player for /vg/. | CF | ||
Simo Häyhä MOIST NUGGET |
Goal Poacher | Simo Häyhä: A Finnish war hero from the 1939-1940 Winter War between Finland and the USSR. He became famous taking out over 500 Soviet soldiers during the course of the war with his M/28-30 which is a Finnish Civil Guards variant of the Mosin Nagant rifle. Being a man used to being innawoods and sporting a white camoflage suit, he was nearly impossible to spot in the snowy forests of Finland, earning him the nickname "White Death" by the Soviets. His career ended when he took a HE round to the jaw, but he survived and lived all the way up to 2002. MOIST NUGGET: Simo's weapon of choice. At once a term of endearment and scorn, the simplified pronunciation "Moist Nugget" commonly refers to almost all iterations of the Mosin-Nagant military rifle. While never the best rifle of its time, mass importation from ex-USSR countries has made its ubiquitous variant, the 91/30, easily the most affordable surplus rifle in the firearms market today. With both the rifle and ammunition for it widely available and inexpensive, it is a popular rifle for those just starting out or without funds for more expensive options. |
AMF | ||
Wagner's Race to Moscow | Destroyer | For the Bakhmut Saga Go here
After Wagner PMC managed to push the Ukranians out of Bakhmut at the end of May, they would hand over the control of the city ruins to the Russian Armed Forces. The seizure of Bakhmut could only be described as phyrric victory of the Wagner PMC and the Russian Armed Forces as they took extremely high amounts of casualties in process, this prompted a lot of accusations going back and forth with the Wagner PMC financier Yevgeny Prigozhin calling out the Russian Ministy of Defence of intentionally undersupplying them with ammunition. These tensions kept on growing after the battle over, with more accusations of the Russian Minstry of Defence trying to covertly destroy Wagner units. It all culiminated on June 23rd when Yevgeny Prigozhin published another video where he called out the entire basis for the Russian >Special >Military >Operation. What followed was a straight up Wagner PMC mutiny where they swiftly took over Rostov(The HQ for the Russian SMO) with no bloodshed. Their goal was to eliminate the Russian Minister of Defence and the Army Chief of Staff. What followed was a highway convoy of Wagner vehicles that were blitzing their way from Rostov to Voronezh with the final destination being Moscow. The Kremlin forces tried to stop this convoy but they had little success as helicopters and planes got shot down by anti-air vehicles controlled by Wagner. However when the convoy was 200km away from Moscow, the entire mutiny got called off. Yevgeny Prigozhin struck some deal with the Belarusian President Lukashenko and the Wagner forces turn back to their camps. Currently Wagner PMC and Prigozhin is exiled to Belarus, their future remains unclear. This whole shitshow led to prime shitposting hours on /k/. |
CMF | ||
ATF | Orchestrator | Our beloved Alcohol, Tabacco and Fireams Agency that just wants the best for every gun owner in the country. Sadly, many /k/ommandos lost all of their guns in tragic boating accidents, when questioned by ATF Agents. The people emplyoed at the ATF also seem to have a distinct hate against any kind of dog. They love shooting the dogs of their suspects for no apparent reason other than fun. | CMF | ||
Discount Cosmonaut Program | Anchor Man | Soviet designed main battle tanks like the T-72 and T-80 are imfamous for their tendency to toss their turrets when suffering catastrophic damage to the ammuniton storage, causing them to fly sky high. The joke generally is that it's the discount cosmonaut program or the turret toss olympics. | DMF | ||
Flavortown PMC in SMexicO | Offensive Fullback | A bizarro world version of Wagner PMC and the Russian SMO. In this silly universe USA is trying to dercartelify Mexico but is instead losing it's own cities to the Mexican Army with the Flavortown PMC committing atrocities and marching on Washington D.C. in protest towards the Pentagon. | RB | ||
Mobik Cube | Offensive Fullback | Item #: SCP-8721 The Mobik Cube
Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: Due to SCP-8721 appearing at unpredictable times and locations, it is impossible to contain them. However, any sightings of SCP-8721 should be reported immediately to the nearest Foundation facility for containment and study. SCP agents are to monitor the Ukrainian and Russian Telegram channels for signs of SCP-8721 activity. Under no circumstances should agents follow any instructions coming from an SCP-8721. If an agent is suspected for being under the influence of SCP-8721. They are to be amesthetized and moved to another assignment. Description: SCP-8721 is a series of fleshy cubes made up of dead Russian soldiers. The cubes are roughly 5 meters by 5 meters by 5 meters and weigh approximately 3 tons. They are composed of various human body parts including bones, muscles, organs and skin. The cubes appear to be compressed versions of Russian soldiers who died during the 2022 Russian invasion of Ukraine. The cubes are often found littered on Ukrainian battlefields where they were left behind after Russian forces retreated. SCP-8721 has shown the ability to communicate with humans through text messages sent via Telegram. The messages sent by SCP-8721 are written in Russian and are usually short and to the point. Messages received from SCP-8721 tend to include words like "comrade" and "brother". When communicating with people, SCP-8721 will sometimes ask questions about current events or politics. It seems to be particularly interested in topics related to Russia and its military operations. It will also occasionally send pictures of itself to the recipient. The means by which these cubes connect to Telegram is currently unknown, but it is suspected that SCP-8721 may communicated via crushed mobile devices found within the SCP-8721 instance. |
LB | ||
COSMOLINE | None | A grease-like preservative and rust preventative, cosmoline is the /k/ommando's greatest ally against rust and his greatest bane to clean. When well covered in cosmoline, metal becomes nearly impervious to the effects of outside moisture and humidity, allowing it to be stored for long periods of time. So when someone buys their seventy year old surplus rifle that's been in cosmoline storage, they can reasonably be assured rust won't be much of a problem. However, the trouble comes when they attempt to clean it off, as it is notoriously pervasive and difficult to remove. Some /k/ommandos have declared their fondness for the smell, feel, and even taste of cosmoline. Ingestion, injection, or insertion is not recommended. | CB | ||
SKS -> Innawoods | None | GRAB SKS, GO INNAWOODS. | CB | ||
Murder/k/ube AKA NEX ALEA | Offensive Goalkeeper | The "Murder Cube", as /k/ knows it, is an artistic piece located in Canada. Made as a testament to all the victims of man's inclination to aggression and oppression (or some hippy crap like that), the Gun Sculpture is simply a massive metal cube decorated in various small arms. Normally, when /k/ sees a picture of firearms destroyed or misused in such a way, there a varying emotions of anger and sadness. However, upon seeing this particular sculpture, /k/ immediately recognized it as a manifestation of some infernal god of war and violence. An entire basis of a religion has since formed. | GK |