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Difference between revisions of "/hato/"
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''"Smell that? You smell that? Rigging, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of rigging in the morning. You know, one time we had a game played, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink brainlet. The smell, you know that | ''"Smell that? You smell that? Rigging, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of rigging in the morning. You know, one time we had a game played, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink brainlet. The smell, you know that semen smell, the whole game. Smelled like… Victory. Someday this league's gonna end…"'' | ||
Back text: APOCALYPSE NOW | Back text: APOCALYPSE NOW |
Revision as of 06:49, 14 March 2019
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Keeping Russia out, America in, and brainlets down. | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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/hato/ - Real Fuckin' NATO | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Historic performance | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Team music | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Kits | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Created solely for the purpose of keeping /blyat/ in check, /hato/ keeps the world safe from the threat of commies, slavs, and cheap vodka.
Until World War III, anyways.
See the Audio export for HQ audio files.
Lineup
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Exports
Exports follow Semantic Versioning. When loading, major version numbers must match, eg. 3.X
Aesthetics | Audio | Tactical | Pastebin |
Roster
Sub | Starter | Bronze | Silver | Gold |
Goalkeepers
No. | Pos. | Name | Potrait | Description | In-PES Character Model | ||
11 |
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Kraut Space Magic |
Before joining /gfg/, Sleepo Beepo was busy serving in the Kraut Space Force, keeping the stars safe from the Red Menace. Its special ammunition was definitely a factor in the G11 not being adopted due to "lack of possibility for NATO standardization". Which is kind of the point. Back text: LIKE CLOCKWORK |
Defense
No. | Pos. | Name | Potrait | Description | In-PES Character Model | ||
4 |
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1 Star MG |
Because she somehow manages to lose out to LWMMG, who is 2*. Back text: BROS... |
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75 |
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PTSD |
After the end of Arctic Warfare, FN FNC thought it would all be over. But now she's received her latest assignment, and she's not sure what's worse. Back text: SURVIVORS GUILT |
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17 |
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Fantasy Heroes |
A shitty mobage stole Glock 17's art. Back text: DEMON RISING |
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3 |
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Sorry Belgium |
In a room full of FN management, some displaced or wounded by the Nazis, a senior German ranking officer asked for a production licence to manufacture FALs within West Germany. Back text: WE SAID SORRY |
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50 |
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>A >FUCKING >LEAF |
Holds the world record for longest sniper kill at 3,540 metres. Made in America, but the shooter was... you guessed it. Back text: WORLD RECORD |
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1 |
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Sniper Wolf |
"I was born on a battlefield. Raised on a battlefield. Gunfire, sirens and screams... they were my lullabies... Hunted like dogs, day after day... driven from our ragged shelters... That... was my life." Back text: SET ME FREE |
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6 |
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(((Greatest Ally))) |
Oy vey, we're your greatest non-NATO ally! Airstrikes? What airstrikes? Back text: REMEMBER THE |
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49 |
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Buyfag |
The laziest bum in the base, she's already skipped past the Blu-rays and figures and gone straight to buying dakis. No wonder your gems were missing! Back text: SLIPPERY SLOPE |
Midfield
No. | Pos. | Name | Potrait | Description | In-PES Character Model | ||
19 |
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TWO WORLD WARS |
Officially supplanted by the M9 as late as 1986, this trusty handgun has seen both World Wars, and several more to boot. She's the last line of defense for the team. If the opponent gets past, suicide is painless. Back text: BACK 2 BACK |
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9 |
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No Stoppan Power |
Back text: NO BULLY |
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67 |
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is that a famas |
Back text: GIVE ME A CLIP |
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85 |
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Quality Control |
H&K was contracted to fix it and came out with the A2 in the year 2000. Back text: FIX IT KRAUTS |
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16 |
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Jack Daniels |
"Smell that? You smell that? Rigging, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of rigging in the morning. You know, one time we had a game played, for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink brainlet. The smell, you know that semen smell, the whole game. Smelled like… Victory. Someday this league's gonna end…" Back text: APOCALYPSE NOW |
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20 |
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Tactical Tuna |
Everyday until you like it. Back text: DEADLIEST CATCH |
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36 |
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Angry Meido |
SKK once dropped to his knees and begged her to show him her panties. She's been like this ever since. Back text: SHOW ME UR PAN2 Back text: BROS... |
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5 |
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Gorilla Warfare |
"What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words." Back text: UR FCKING DED KDDO |
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41 |
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HKM4 |
Back text: WE GOT HIM |
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23 |
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Offensive Handgun |
"Then there is the Mk23. Which is huge, accurate, reliable, (which it damn well better be, since it is the size and weight of a Mini-14) costs as much as a used car, huge, and is universally despised by the SF that it is issued to. ... But that’s okay, because the HK fan boys will explain that it is an OFFENSIVE handgun. Back text: OPERATOR |
Forwards
No. | Pos. | Name | Potrait | Description | In-PES Character Model | ||
69 |
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xXx360xXxNoScOp3xXx |
1v1 me faggot nuketown snipers only 1 like = 1 core Back text: SAMPLE TEXT |
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90 |
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RUSH B |
AHHHH NU CHEEKI BREEKI IV DAMKE Back text: CYKA |
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82 |
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Fuck Argies |
When she's not busy being the Right Arm of the Free World, she punishes dumb >whites who try and claim land that isn't theirs. It gets a bit awkward when both sides use her. Back text: THE FALKLANDS |
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2 |
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2B |
>android created by humanity to fight evil robots >white hair, black clothes They didn't even try did they? Back text: GLORY 2 MANKIND |