/u/ roster

/u/ Current roster. Old rosters can be found here: /u/ Historical Rosters

Main Roster

Starting 11

Position	No.	Name	Image	Description	Nationality	Shirt name
GK	9	Madokami		She Who Saves, a stalwart of the /u/ team from it's inception. Originally intending to keep a watchful eye on Akemi Homura, her utter failure to prevent her transformation into Homucifer has steeled her resolve to let nothing past her, so that no magical girl divegrass fan would ever have to feel despair ever again.	Japan	Kaname
CB	8	Goggles		Capable of spinning an entire tragic love story out of a single meeting of eyes! Willing to ignore all types of denial when a single hand has been held! Nothing gets past Goggles!	Brazil	Yuri vision
CB	18	Onee-sama		Less a single person and more a representation of what thousands of young lesbians fawn over every day, The Onee-sama is one of the founding tenements of lesbianism. She has taken to being a Center Back for /u/ because she's quite experienced at being the center of a person's world.	Japan	Ogasawara
CB	15	Science Babies		When a girl and another girl love each other very much, sometimes science steps in and provides a lovely little bundle of joy to keep them awake at night with her horrible screaming and crying. Technically speaking on loan from /sci/, Science Babies is eager to make Mommy and Mommy proud.	Japan	iPS
DMF	20	Macarons		Not only delicious and gay, but also the signal for everyone to start an edit war over how they're spelled.	France	Macaroons
CMF	1	Teru Time		From the way people talk about Miyanaga Teru, she seems to be some kind of supreme god of Mahjong, which means she must also be some kind of supreme god of lesbianism. Her dyke level must be comparable to the likes of Satou Sei and Fujino Shizuru, if not higher. She must have some kind of aura, covering a fairly wide distance, which causes any female who walks into it to suddenly start blushing bright red, have an accelerated heartbeat and heavy breathing. Some must even pass out from dehydration, due to their vaginas overflowing in a sudden and uncontrollable explosion of love juices, which drains a great deal of moisture from their bodies. Indeed, so much as laying eyes on Miyanaga Teru will cause a girl to throw her dignity and self-respect out the window and start desperately pleasuring herself on the spot. And if the Teru takes a liking to her, it's all over. Her mind will never recover, but she won't care because her body will be in heaven.	Japan	Miyanaga
LMF	2	Feito-chan		Converted from /a/ by BEFRIENDING, Feito-chan has been a stalwart of the team ever since then. Though some have called her loyalty into question, as long as she gets a regular lasering from BEFREINDING, Feito-chan says she'll happily stay with /u/.	Italy	Testarossa
RMF	13	BEFRIENDING		A commonplace mating ritual of the Action Lesbian (Dynamicans Sappho), BEFRIENDING typically involves giant laser beams and staggeringly homoerotic declarations. Just as BEFRIENDING lets two girls pick up in the right place, so too has BEFRIENDING taken up the position of right midwing.	Japan	Takamachi
AMF	69	Purest Form Of Love		Love between two girls is the purest form of love.	Japan	Yuri
SS (Captain)	14	Akkarin		The ultimate sneakiness, the living embodiment of avoiding the limelight, /u/ proudly presents: Akar- Eh? Where'd she go...?	Japan	Literally who
CF	66	Homucifer		Once merely Homura Akemi, Homucifer has now transcended mortality in order to spend more time with her beloved Madokami. Since Madokami plays divegrass, Homucifer will too. There was some discussion about whether her mortal goalscoring record would carry over to her new form, but such actions have been revealed as the work of the Incubators, attempting to undermine Homucifer's position as Glorious Lesbian Overlord of All Creation.	Japan	Akemi

Substitutes

Position	No.	Name	Image	Description	Nationality	Shirt name
GK	33	But We're Both Girls		BUT WE'RE BOTH GIRLS	Japan	Forbidden love
CB	19	Low Impact Consensual Cuddling		Rated P for Pure even in Australia.	Australia	Pure
CB	3	Post Apocalyptic Bonding		Nothing like the end of the world to find love.	Japan	Potatoes
CB	44	Being Yaya Is Suffering		So much suffering she's back for another go. It's her year!	Japan	Yaya
DMF	10	How Two Girls Have Sex		A mystery that has plagued lesbians (and Google) since the dawn of time.	Japan	Google
DMF	92	Hifumin Leeeeeader		From the desks of Eagle Jump to the pitch of the soccer fields. What better way to get over that shyness?	Japan	Takimoto
DMF	41	The Mochiverse		DEEPEST LORE	Japan	Mochi-au-Lait
DMF	33	Dai Dai Daisuki		Not even Pure Illusion can prepare one for the sheer nonsensical insanity of virtual divegrass. Papika, however, is only looking for Cocona.	Japan	PPKCCN
RMF	4	Alien From Black Lizard Planet		Invaders from the Black Lizard Planet are known to not play divegrass, not like girls and always tell the truth.	England	Ange
RMF	9	Are You a Lolicon?		[The /u/ wiki staff denies any responsibility, up to and including jail time, incurred for trying to answer that question. Likewise, the /u/ wiki staff strongly recommends leaving the answering of that question to our experienced girls.]	Japan	Yes
LMF	16	°◇°		Inn attendant, time traveler, friend of ghosts and gods. Now soccer player. What else will you stumble upon, Yuzu?	Japan	Yuzu
LMF	39	Black Sunshine		As Hibiki is back, so is she. Black Sunshine's mission continues and she will see it through.	Japan	Kohinata

Retired Players

Old Position	Name	Image	Description	Date Departed
CMF	Spontaneous Combustion		What do you think happened to her?	End of 2014 season
DMF	Sumisumi		With her president graduating to university and her studies taking up more of her time, Sumisumi stepped down to let the new generation step up. Given her height, most people assumed she'd stepped down already.	End of 2014 season
CB	Ruined Birthday Party		Happy birthday, KannaMiko. ;_;7	End of 2014 Season
LB	Nio-ssu		It turns out tiny shark lesbians aren't all that good at divegrass. Who knew?	End of 2014 Season
RB	Dying Arisawa		Fortunately for her and Yuno, the cure for terminal plotdevicitis was found. Unfortunately for the team, it was to not play divegrass.	Start of 2016 Season
RB	Cousins By The Way		Found out certain states allowed cousin marriage, quit the team to do exactly that.	Start of 2016 Season
LB	Eila Juutilainen		Her contract finished, she went back to Sanya's warm embrace.	Start of 2016 Season
CB	Ayayayayaya		Ayayayyyyy	Summer 2016
DMF	Stamen		A True Alpha Lesbian takes time off to pollinate her harem.	Summer 2016
CMF	Saint Michael		6. And on the seventh day, Saint Michael rested.	Summer 2016
GK	Spitting Distance		A surprisingly long distance, apparently. Well beyond what's considered "ladylike" and much too far for the rigorous quality control applied to all /u/ players.	Start of 2017 Season
CMF	Metall/u/rgy		Divegrass fields are low on metals. Contract expired and mining operations relocated.	Start of 2017 Season
SS	Lesbodynamics		This is a science best studied in a lab. Or in bed.	Start of 2017 Season
CB	ANGST AND DRAMA		The pitch is too dramatic, even for this seasoned veteran who retired to enjoy even more misunderstandings off the field.	Spring 2017
CB	Punished Bocchi		Such a tough place ;_;	Spring 2017
CMF	Ano Route		What do you mean "they didn't do an Ano route"?	Spring 2017
CMF	Intertwined Fingers		Was let go after repeated warnings from media watchdogs against online indecency. Kids might be watching!	Summer 2017
CB	Kuma Shock		Ascended with Kumaria. Which is also sexy. Shabadadoo~	Winter 2018
CB	Doragon Meido		Better service as spectator.	Winter 2018
DMF	Fingering For World Peace		World peace achieved! At least on the pitch. Plenty more fingering to do on the sidelines!	Winter 2018
DMF	Archdyke		Retired to better take care of her country and her witch.	Winter 2018
RMF	Loathsome Daughter of Heresy		Was left go after too many belly exposures were declared 'indecent'. Besides, the field is far too chaotic to divine	Winter 2018
LMF	Touching Paddles		Retiring after deciding ping pong was a more heart racing sport.	Winter 2018