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/u/ roster

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Revision as of 21:02, 26 July 2020 by Potatorecipe (talk | contribs) ('Big Aquarium Conspiracy' and 'I'm Yuu But Stronger' had their placements on the roster swapped, corrected it)
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/u/ Current roster. Old rosters can be found here: /u/ Historical Rosters

Main Roster

Starting 11

Position No. Name Image Description Nationality Shirt name
  GK
77 Madokami Madokami Is Real.jpg She Who Saves, a stalwart of the /u/ team from it's inception. Originally intending to keep a watchful eye on Akemi Homura, her utter failure to prevent her transformation into Homucifer has steeled her resolve to let nothing past her, so that no magical girl divegrass fan would ever have to feel despair ever again. Japan Kaname
  LB
2 How Two Girls Have Sex In A Tent How Two Girls Have Sex (in a Tent).jpg Outdoor guides never seem to include this important detail Japan FUCKING INTENSE
  CB
8 Goggles Yoorie goggles.jpg Capable of spinning an entire tragic love story out of a single meeting of eyes! Willing to ignore all types of denial when a single hand has been held! Nothing gets past Goggles! Japan Yurivision
  CB
18 Onee-sama The iconic oneesama.jpg Less a single person and more a representation of what thousands of young lesbians fawn over every day, The Onee-sama is one of the founding tenements of lesbianism. She has taken to being a Center Back for /u/ because she's quite experienced at being the center of a person's world. Japan Onee-samaaaa
  RB
15 Science Babies Science babbies.png When a girl and another girl love each other very much, sometimes science steps in and provides a lovely little bundle of joy to keep them awake at night with her horrible screaming and crying. Technically speaking on loan from /sci/, Science Babies is eager to make Mommy and Mommy proud. Japan iPS
  CMF
14 Akkarin AKKARIIIN~.png The ultimate sneakiness, the living embodiment of avoiding the limelight, /u/ proudly presents: Akar- Eh? Where'd she go...? Japan Literally who
  DMF
0 Macarons Macarons.jpg Not only delicious and gay, but also the signal for everyone to start an edit war over how they're spelled. France Macaroons
  RWF
6 BEFRIENDING Befriending in process.jpg A commonplace mating ritual of the Action Lesbian (Dynamicans Sappho), BEFRIENDING typically involves giant laser beams and staggeringly homoerotic declarations. Just as BEFRIENDING lets two girls pick up in the right place, so too has BEFRIENDING taken up the position of right midwing. Japan Takamachi
  LWF
7 Feito-chan Feito-chan.png Converted from /a/ by BEFRIENDING, Feito-chan has been a stalwart of the team ever since then. Though some have called her loyalty into question, as long as she gets a regular lasering from BEFRIENDING, Feito-chan says she'll happily stay with /u/. Italy Testarossa
  AMF
69 Purest Form Of Love PFoL.jpg Love between two girls is the purest form of love. Japan Yuri
  CF
666 Homucifer Homucifer.png Once merely Homura Akemi, Homucifer has now transcended mortality in order to spend more time with her beloved Madokami. Since Madokami plays divegrass, Homucifer will too. There was some discussion about whether her mortal goalscoring record would carry over to her new form, but such actions have been revealed as the work of the Incubators, attempting to undermine Homucifer's position as Glorious Lesbian Overlord of All Creation. Japan >Hameru

Substitutes

Position No. Name Image Description Nationality Shirt name
  LB
33 I'm Yuu But Stronger Stronger Yuu.jpg Rescued Sayaka from the Yaya group. Congratulations, Sayaka! Japan Edamoto
  LB
1 Alien From Black Lizard Planet Black Lizard Planet.jpg Invaders from the Black Lizard Planet are known to not play divegrass, not like girls and always tell the truth. England Liar
  CB
82 Low Impact Consensual Cuddling Low Impact.png Rated P for Pure even in Australia. Australia Pure
  CB
4 Being Yaya Is Suffering Being Yayaka is Suffering.png The faces change, the names are mostly similar, the circumstances are always the same. Japan Not again
  CB
22 But We're Both Girls BOTH GIRLS.png BUT WE'RE BOTH GIRLS Japan Forbidden love
  RB
21 Big Aquarium Conspiracy Aquarium.png A surprising amount of yuri works have started featuring the Aquarium Date. As if someone manipulated things from the water tanks... Japan Blub Blub
  RB
43 War Crimes Kurumi War Crimes Kurumi.png Magical drugs. Torture. Mind break. All is fair in love and war, and Kurumi's mission is both. Japan Mugen
  CMF
39 Black Sunshine Mikugear.jpg As Hibiki is back, so is she. Black Sunshine's mission continues and she will see it through. Japan Kohinata
  CMF
11 Mistress Baiser Mistress Baiser.png When you like Magical Girls so much you become a BDSM Mistress to sexually harass them. Japan Hiiragi
  DMF
7 G/u/ardians Rolac.png These heroines protect the General from the Evil Fairy. Now they protect the team. Japan Rolac
  DMF
450 ERNESTAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! ERNESTAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!.jpg It's a name you can't help but SCREAM Germany Fugo
  CMF
20s Demon Dork Shamiko.jpg Hang in there, Shamiko! Soon you'll be a football playing demon! Japan Shamiko

Retired Players

Old Position Name Image Description Date Departed
  CMF
Teru Time Look at the teru time.png After a long and distinguished career, it was finally her time to go. It will always be Teru o'clock in our hearts. Summer 2018
  CMF
Spontaneous Combustion Spontcomb.jpg What do you think happened to her? Winter 2015
  DMF
Sumisumi Sumisumi.jpg With her president graduating to university and her studies taking up more of her time, Sumisumi stepped down to let the new generation step up. Given her height, most people assumed she'd stepped down already. Winter 2015
  CB
Ruined Birthday Party Happi basudei.jpg Happy birthday, KannaMiko. ;_;7 Winter 2015
  LB
Nio-ssu Nio-ssu's lovely smile.png It turns out tiny shark lesbians aren't all that good at divegrass. Who knew? Winter 2015
  RB
Dying Arisawa Phone senpai.jpg Fortunately for her and Yuno, the cure for terminal plotdevicitis was found. Unfortunately for the team, it was to not play divegrass. Winter 2016
  RB
Cousins By The Way LesbianCousins.png Found out certain states allowed cousin marriage, quit the team to do exactly that. Winter 2016
  LB
Eila Juutilainen Eila.jpg Her contract finished, she went back to Sanya's warm embrace. Winter 2016
  CB
Ayayayayaya Ayaya.jpg Ayayayyyyy Summer 2016
  DMF
Stamen YuriCam-1-035.png A True Alpha Lesbian takes time off to pollinate her harem. Summer 2016
  CMF
Saint Michael Saint Michael.png 6. And on the seventh day, Saint Michael rested. Summer 2016
  GK
Spitting Distance Spitting distance.jpg A surprisingly long distance, apparently. Well beyond what's considered "ladylike" and much too far for the rigorous quality control applied to all /u/ players. Winter 2017
  CMF
Metall/u/rgy Metallurgy.png Divegrass fields are low on metals. Contract expired and mining operations relocated. Winter 2017
  SS
Lesbodynamics Lesbodynamics.gif This is a science best studied in a lab. Or in bed. Winter 2017
  CB
ANGST AND DRAMA Angst.png The pitch is too dramatic, even for this seasoned veteran who retired to enjoy even more misunderstandings off the field. Spring 2017
  CB
Punished Bocchi Punished Bocchi.png Such a tough place ;_; Spring 2017
  CMF
Ano Route Ano Route.png What do you mean "they didn't do an Ano route"? Spring 2017
  CMF
Intertwined Fingers Intertwined Fingers.jpg Was let go after repeated warnings from media watchdogs against online indecency. Kids might be watching! Summer 2017
  CB
Kuma Shock GAU GAU.jpg Ascended with Kumaria. Which is also sexy. Shabadadoo~ Winter 2018
  CB
Doragon Meido Doragon Meido.jpg Better service as spectator. Winter 2018
  DMF
Fingering For World Peace Fingering For World Peace.jpg World peace achieved! At least on the pitch. Plenty more fingering to do on the sidelines! Winter 2018
  DMF
Archdyke Fine.png Retired to better take care of her country and her witch. Winter 2018
  RMF
Loathsome Daughter of Heresy Loathsome Daughter.png Was left go after too many belly exposures were declared 'indecent'. Besides, the field is far too chaotic to divine Winter 2018
  LMF
Touching Paddles Agari.jpg Retired after deciding ping pong was a more heart racing sport. Winter 2018
  CB
Dai Dai Daisuki Papika.jpg Noting the lack of shards and that even Pure Illusion is less random, she retired. Summer 2018
  DMF
Hifumin Leeeeeader Hifumin.jpg It's death march at Eagle Jump! No time for soccer! ( ; w ; ) ノ Summer 2018
  DMF
The Mochiverse The Mochiverse.png The Mochiverse is a thing that transcends time, space and dimensions. It now also transcends the soccer fields. Autumn 2018
  DMF
Post Apocalyptic Bonding Post-apocalyptic Bonding.jpg The end of the world also means the end of soccer. Survival will have to continue off the pitch. Autumn 2018
  CMF
°◇° Rhombus.jpg A sudden influx of guests made her return to her normal job as an inn attendant. Autumn 2018
  DMF
Pussy Whisperer Pussy Whisperer.jpg Seducing your teacher requires, amongst other things, a lot of sleepovers, tied arms and Sister Juice. Those are very time consuming, and very little was left for divegrass, so she retired. Winter 2019
  CMF
Abababababa Abababababa.jpg Her resignation form reads: "bad as it may be, this unworthy self needs time to focus on her manga and thus needs to resign from the team". The line "ABABABABABA" is written below and crossed out. Winter 2019
  CMF
Yamada's Sprout Yamada's Sprout.png Winter is not a good season for plants, let alone the soccer pitch. Winter 2019
  DMF
Bananice Bananice.jpg Position Zero. Summer 2019
  DMF
Incest Receiver Incest Receiver.jpg Summer is when most beach volleyball tournaments take place, so this couple resigned the team to focus on those. Summer 2019
  CMF
How To Make A Bomb How to make a bomb.png No bomb, no door, no scheme can protect a loli from a musclemaid. Summer 2019
  CMF
The Spy Who Licked Me The Spy Who Licked Me.jpg Mission complete. Summer 2019
  CMF
Are You A Lolicon? Are you a lolicon.png [Told you.] Summer 2019
  CMF
Blood Countess Blood Countess.jpg Having taken her due, Ellie now sleeps. Winter 2020
  DMF
Bedroom Tyrant Bedroom Tyrant.jpg Onee-chan! Winter 2020
  LB
Girlship Girlship.jpg It's still yuri. Summer 2020
  RB
Is This Yuri? Is This Yuri.jpg Yes, it was yuri. Summer 2020
  CMF
MAHJONG GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES MAHJONG GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES.png Chose to retire to give our expert analysts more time to investigate what the hell is going on with the plot. ("¡Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!") Summer 2020