/x/ roster
Goalkeepers
| Position | Number | Name | Picture | Description | Debut | ||
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1 | NOPE | 
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Despite frequent instances of "spaghetti", this battle hardened engineer is /x/'s first choice for a goalie. With years of experience and team play, NOPE will deny any plucky striker with his long arms and neck. | 2012 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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14 | Solomon Demon | 
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This abomination appeared in Israel, bound and made a slave by King Solomon (see, this is what happens when you give a Jew a magic ring). | 2014 4chan Summer Cup |
Defenders
| Position | Number | Name | Picture | Description | Debut | ||
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16 | SCP Series | 
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What started as a series of posts describing containment procedures for potentially dangerous or world ending items and creatures eventually became a Wiki purported to belong to the SCP Foundation. Each entry lists the danger level, containment procedures, and usually a short story or incident report. Above all, SCP looks to secure, contain, and protect the net. | 2014 4chan Winter Cup | ||
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3 | The Grifter | 
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A haunted video that will kill the viewer after watching, and home to the creepiest baby of all time. Opponents be weary if you find a strange doll in your home after a match. | 2012 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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11 | This Man | 
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Every night, all over the world, hundreds of people see this face in their dreams. If this man appears in your dreams too, or you have any information that can help us identify him, please contact us. | 2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup | ||
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4 | Astral Meetup | 
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What better way to make new friends than to lie together in a circle and try to force your soul out of your own body? | 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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20 | Ethereal Ghost | 
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You've heard of ghosts right? How about Ethereal ghosts? They're just like normal ghosts....only spookier....A cocky defender who was recently demoted to the role of backup CB after a questionable performance in the 2017 Autumn Babby Cup. | 2014 4chan Winter Cup | ||
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7 | Spooky Mulder | 
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With years of experience under his belt, Spooky Mulder returned to investigate the /x/ team. Somewhere along the line he ended up getting drafted as a Centerback, though he's still searching for some kind of truth. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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5 | Creepypasta | 
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As the staple /x/ left back, the bald blue Creepypasta is one of the very best when it comes to passes, working with The Grey on the left wing to fully establish /x/'s strong wing play. | 2011 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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21 | Ghost Puncher | 
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Not even ghosts could phase him - you think he's scared of anyone on your team? Beaming with courage (or lack of common sense), Ghost Puncher demonstrates his total devotion to lifting by punching holes into the opponent's offense and going for a blooter himself every now and then. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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15 | Mothman | 
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A staple of West Virginia folklore and Cryptozoology, Mothman sightings on /x/'s roster had been few and far between over the past few years. | 2012 4chan Winter Cup | ||
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12 | Cursed Image | 
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CURSED IMAGE DO NOT OPEN OR STARE AT ALSO IT'S A VIRUS | 2018 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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17 | Lost Media | 
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Threads attempting to hunt down lost media, predominately movies and TV shows. First appearing on /x/ during the hunt for the lost Nickelodeon movie Cry Baby Lane, the threads have ingrained themselves within /x/'s culture. Recent events include the hunt for clock man with the help of The Flood from the Bungie forums, and the hunt for a bizarre Spongebob...thing with the help of /co/. Unlike his namesake, Lost Media is quite easy to find -- around his own 18 yard box. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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14 | Chaos Magick | 
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The practice of chaos magick is an ancient and refined art, where you use the power of faith and belief to make the extraordinary actually happen. Or you just consume so many hallucinogens that you can't tell the difference. | 2014 4chan Winter Cup |
Midfielders
| Position | Number | Name | Picture | Description | Debut | ||
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2 | Slenderman | 
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The tallest player on the team by far, Slenderman has been a staple in the /x/ defensive line for years, even with some goals to his name in his brief stint as a forward. Always watches, no eyes. | 2011 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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13 | >be me >be alone | 
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Haunted by a ghost that no one else can see, >be me is often too petrified to move around the pitch, making him a suitable Anchor Man that can balance out Zodiac Killer's predatory defensive tactics. | 2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup | ||
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22 | Berenstæin Bears | 
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Do you remember a series of books from childhood featuring a family of anthropomorphic bears? You seems to remember the name of the family as the Berenstein Bears, but moving to your long forgotten copies from childhood you gasp, reading the name as Berenstain Bears. Clearly, you have slid from your previous timeline into the current one you now inhabit. Or not. Who knows. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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23 | Secret Society | 
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Having manipulated world events over the course of centuries, this Midfielder will do everything in his power to keep truth-searchers and opposing forwards at bay. Does not get along with Spooky Mulder. | 2014 4chan Winter Cup | ||
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16 | Zodiac Killer | 
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The Zodiac Killer is looking to continue his kill streak by adding a few hopes and dreams to the list. Also definitely not Ted Cruz. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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9 | The Grey | 
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"The Grey Alien" is the most commonly sighted alien worldwide. Short in stature with weak skeletal bodies, large black eyes and a bulbous head. Basically your generic alien (ayy lmao). | 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup | ||
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8 | Cthulhu | 
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The driving force in /x/'s midfield play, Cthulhu has a bag of tricks to keep the opponents guessing. Often finds himself wide open on the end of a through ball having slipped past the defensive line after shenanigans by /x/-tan and Goatman. Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn. | 2014 4chan Winter Cup |
Forwards
| Position | Number | Name | Picture | Description | Debut | ||
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10 | /x/-tan | 
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The very essence and soul of the /x/ board put in a girl shaped bundle. Cute and Creepy. A truly gifted player, /x/-tan is the driving force behind the /x/ attack, able to shoot and pass brilliantly with both feet and use mesmerizing skills to outfox defenders, /x/-tan is always a tricky problem for any team to face. | 2012 4chan Summer Cup | ||
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6 | Goatman 
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A staple in creepypasta now a day, Goatman was originally called Skinwalker before an /x/ browsing Native American cleared up the differences. Popularized by the Asansi Goatman story and many more like it, Goatman is a creature that works its way into groups of people and impersonates one of them. Some of them are looking to escape the woods they inhabit, while others are just fucking assholes who want to mess with you. I wouldn't worry about it. | 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup |