Difference between revisions of "/co/ Roster"

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(Updated /co/'s ancient roster)
 
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<big>[[/co/|Back to /co/'s main page]]</big>
Accurate as of January 2022. If anything here is wrong it's {{greentext|(You)}}r fault.
{|{{Prettytable}}
{|{{Prettytable}}
|-
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|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Pos.'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Origin'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;" | '''Boots'''
|width="10%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Card(s)'''
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 1
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''The Boulder''' GK/Starter
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Cast_iron_skillet.png|x100px]]
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| THE BOULDER IS READY FOR WHATEVER COMES. HE WILL CATCH, BLOCK, AND STOP EVERY SHOT AT HIS GOAL. YOU CAN'T BEAT THE BOULDER, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" |
|style="background:#C3D69B;"|&mdash;
|-
|align="center" | 12
|align="center" | '''Jake the Dog''' GK
|align="center"|[[File:Sad_crab.png|x100px]]
| When not adventuring with his best friend Finn in the land of Ooo, Jake can be found defending the goal for /co/. He can be very competitive and utilizes his shape-shifting abilities to stop all incoming shots.
|align="center" |
|&mdash;
|-
| align="center" | 23
| align="center" | '''Mogo''' GK
|align="center"|[[File:Vegan_Shitstorm.png|x100px]]
| This Green Lantern is best known for his size, he is in fact, a planet. An absolute monster on defense, you have no way of getting around him.
|align="center" |
|&mdash;
|-
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 52
|style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center"|{{Position|GK}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | Hypercrisis
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:hypercrisis.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| /co/ fan theory about how all of Grant Morrison's works connect
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| Yes, it's as stupid as it sounds
|}
|}


<h3>Centre-backs</h3>
<h3>Defenders</h3>
{|{{Prettytable}}
{|{{Prettytable}}
|-
|-
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Pos.'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Origin'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;" | '''Boots'''
|width="10%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Card(s)'''
|-
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 2
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 2
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Aku'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|{{Position|LB}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Roadkill.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Dead Parents'''  
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| Long ago in a distant land, I AKU, The Football-Playing Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable defense. But a foolish samurai warrior, wearing some magic shoes stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final goal was scored I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the future, where my evil is law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the future that is AKU.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:dead parents.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Geometra Pro'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" | Batman's origin that his parents are dead.  
|style="background:#C3D69B;"|&mdash;
|style="background: #C3D69B" | His parents are deaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!!  
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 1
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|{{Position|CB}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Judge Dredd'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:Dredd.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" | Character from 2000 AD comics, the law
|style="background: #C3D69B" | Scoring goals is 20 years in the cube, creep!
|-
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 4
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 14
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Sexism'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|{{Position|CB}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Verticalrecipe.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Alan Moore'''  
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| A player all fans can identify with. Sexism rose through the ranks of the youth squads and was even a member of the Red Hood Supporter's Club.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:Alan_moore.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Geometra Pro'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" |Famous for writer of The Watchmen. Looks like a wizard.
|style="background:#C3D69B;"|&mdash;
|style="background: #C3D69B" |Arguably still coasting off of his success in the Watchmen's Football Club, Alan is known for getting into disputes with other player's over creator ownership. His narcissistic attitude is only matched by his short flashes of brilliance, reminiscent of his younger self.
|-
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 5
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 6
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Rightclops'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|{{Position|RB}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Milk_jar.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Rightclops'''  
|style="background:#C3D69B;"| Scott Summers, aka Cyclops will be racing up the field aided by his signature punches from the punch dimension. When it comes to making passes, this guy is always right.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:rightclops.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Total 90 Laser IV'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" | From the "Cyclops Was Right" movement, itself an offshoot of "Magneto Was Right", where X-Men hero-turned-villain Cyclops resorts to any method to ensure peace for his fellow Mutants.
|style="background:#C3D69B;"|
|style="background: #C3D69B" | Scott Summers, aka Cyclops will be racing up the field aided by his signature punches from the punch dimension. When it comes to making passes, this guy is always right.  
|-
|-
|align="center" | 13
|align="center" | 15
|align="center" | '''Doom'''
|align="center"|{{Position|LB}}
|align="center"|[[File:Tartar_Sauce_2.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''T.O.M.'''
| Doctor Doom is adored by fans, but rarely ever reciprocates any emotion. Known for his signature "Richards" shout as a goal celebration, many up and coming athletes admire him for his discipline and perseverance.
|align="center"|[[File:Tom.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Geometra Pro'''
| Host of the Toonami block on [adult swim]
|&mdash;
| A fan favorite, T.O.M.'s return has sparked the weekly practice among /co/ management to drink heavily to forget you're watching shit
|-
|align="center" | 12
|align="center"|{{Position|LB}}
|align="center" | '''Carlos!'''
|align="center" | [[File:Carlos.jpg|x200px]]
|Infamous Magic School Bus character. Whenever a pun is brewing, you can probably guess which cheeky Mexican fuck posted it
|'''CARLOS!'''
|-
|align="center" | 69
|align="center"|{{Position|CB}}
|align="center" | '''Sexism'''
|align="center"|[[File:sexism.jpeg|x200px]]
| The trend in western comics which makes <s>strong, independent</s> female characters SEXY AS HELL
| A player all fans can identify with. Sexism rose through the ranks of the youth squads and was even a member of the Red Hood Supporter's Club.  
|-
|align="center" | 4
|align="center"|{{Position|CB}}
|align="center" | '''Superdickery'''
|align="center"|[[File:superdickery.jpg|x200px]]
| Comes from Silver Age comic covers featuring Superman being a dick out of context. Basically pre-internet clickbait.
| '''JIMMY,''' this gift you got me for '''FATHER'S DAY''' makes me sorry I ever adopted you as my son. I'll have to '''DESTROY IT''' to teach you '''A LESSON!'''
|-
|align="center" | 21
|align="center"|{{Position|CB}}
|align="center" | '''That's My Purse'''
|align="center"|[[File:mypurse.jpg|x200px]]
| Line from a King of the Hill episode where Bobby enrolls in a woman's self defense course. Hilarity ensures
| I DON'T KNOW YOU
|-
|-
|align="center" | 40
|align="center" | 34
|align="center" | '''40 Cakes'''
|align="center"|{{Position|RB}}
|align="center"|[[File:Chicken_Nugger.jpg|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''Donald'''
| A meme originated from a DC dictionary for kids. The line was "Lex Luthor stole 40 cakes. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible."
|align="center"|[[File:donald.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Geometra Pro'''
| Comes from a thread where OP confuses Arthur for "Donald". This was the height of comedy in 2014.
|&mdash;
| /co/ continues to repeat this joke every few months while oldfags cringe and wish tourists didn't fall for this shit bait
|-
|-
|align="center" | 15
|align="center" | 3
|align="center" | '''Brock Samson'''
|align="center" | {{Position|RB}}
|align="center"|[[File:Packet_ramen.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''Win O' Thread'''
| Agent of the O.S.I. This Swedish Murder Machine is ready to go totally sick-house on the asses of the opposing team.
|align="center"|[[File:Win_o_thread.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Geometra Pro'''
| A weekly thread where /co/mardes come to dump the latest issues of new comics in an easily to download format.
|&mdash;
| Win O'Thread is a popular player known for his good relations with /co/'s supporter group. Though gifted with natural talent he's been accused of not doing enough to support the industr…err team.
|-
|-
|}
|}
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<h3>Midfield</h3>
<h3>Midfield</h3>
{|{{Prettytable}}
{|{{Prettytable}}
|-
|colspan=6 style="background:#95B3D7;"|<h4>Defensive Midfield</h4>
|-
|-
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Pos'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Origin'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;" | '''Boots'''
|width="10%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Card(s)'''
|-
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 6
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | Frank
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Dead Parents'''
|style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center"|{{Position|DMF}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Alton_brown.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''{{greentext|My Frank When}}'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" |His parents are deaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!!
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:my frank when.png|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Morelia Neo'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" | Ancient /co/ meme where someone cropped a face from Steve Dillon's art of The Punisher (properly called Frank Face) and typed {{greentext|My Frank When}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" |
|style="background:#C3D69B;" | {{greentext|My Frank When}}
|-
|-
|align="center" | 16
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 40
|align="center" | '''Alan Moore'''
|style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center"|{{Position|CMF}}
|align="center"|[[File:Masaokis.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''40 Cakes'''
|Arguably still coasting off of his success in the Watchmen's Football Club, Alan is known for getting into disputes with other player's over creator ownership. His narcissistic attitude is only matched by his short flashes of brilliance, reminiscent of his younger self.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"|[[File:40_cakes.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Supersonic Wave 3'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" | A meme originating from a DC dictionary for kids.
|
|style="background:#C3D69B;" | 40 Cakes has stolen 40 balls from opponents. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.
|-
|-
|align="center" | 17
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | 7
|align="center" | '''Work on Your Art'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" |{{Position|CMF}}
|align="center"|[[File:Frugal_Mode.jpg|x100px]]
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''/co/lette'''
|Seriously
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:colette.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | /co/ original creation. A mix of [http://the-conservatory.wikia.com/wiki//co/lette traits from /co/'s different waifus]
|&mdash;
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | Showing fantastic leadership and skill behind the scenes and during the off season, /co/lette has taken on the role of the club's new central striker. She is still /co/'s perfect brown waifu and looks forward to bringing JUSTICE to the pitch with the rest of the club's players at her side.
|-
|-
|colspan=6 style="background:#95B3D7;"|<h4>Winged Midfielders</h4>
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | 11
|-
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" |{{Position|AMF}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 7
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''Doom''' {{captain}}
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''T.O.M.'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | [[File:Doom.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Gordon_ramsay.png|x100px]]
|style="background:#EDDA74;"| Main <s>antagonist</s> savior of the Fantastic Four series from Marvel.
|style="background: #C3D69B" |
|style="background:#EDDA74;"| Doctor Doom is adored by fans, but rarely ever reciprocates any emotion. Known for his signature "Richards" shout as a goal celebration, many up and coming athletes admire him for his discipline and perseverance. After a failure of a team for multiple cups in a row, Doom has finally taken the team into his own hands.
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Supersonic Wave 3'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" |
|-
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 3
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Bad News'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Iron_chef.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #C3D69B" | He's bad news
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
|style="background: #C3D69B" |
|-
|align="center" | 18
|align="center" | '''Win'o Thread'''
|align="center"|[[File:Fridge_ketchup.png|x100px]]
| Win O'Thread is a popular player known for his good relations with /co/'s supporter group. Though gifted with natural talent he's been accused of not doing enough to support the industr…err team.
|align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
|
|-
|-
|align="center" | 19
|align="center" | 19
|align="center" | '''Hope Corgi'''
|align="center"|{{Position|DMF}}
|align="center"|[[File:Sriracha.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''Mr. Meeseeks'''
| "All we be well! I am a dog! Corgis are a British bread." (We think he means to say breed.) "I am delicious! Do you need a hug?"
|align="center"|[[File:mr meeseeks.png|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
| Character from Rick and Morty, whose purpose is to fulfill a single request from its creator and then disappear immediately. Apparently /co/ has a slave army of these things.
|&mdash;
| I'M MR. MEESEEKS. LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
|-
|-
|align="center" | 20
|align="center" | 16
|align="center" | '''Superior Spider-Man'''
|align="center"|{{Position|DMF}}
|align="center"|[[File:Steak_thread.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''CalArts Style'''
| Peter Parker was a fool. He wasted his talents on the pitch and squandered his gifts. This new Spider-Man says he will be something greater and that all who oppose him will be crushed by the power and skill of a Superior Spider-Man!
|align="center" | [[File:Cal_arts.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
| <s>Recent</s> Omnipresent trend in style of cartoons named after the animation school of CalArts, involves very noodly limbs, simplistic styles, thin lines, and bean mouths
|&mdash;
| First became a meme in 2016 when the Powerpuff Girls reboot raped your childhood, then again in 2018 after Thundercats Roar raped another demographic of childhoods. As of 2022 the trend shows no sign of stopping, extending even to 3D animation. However, "CalArts Style" <s>as a criticism is functionally meaningless due to the endless variety of shows it is labelled with to the point where any show with rounded character designs or a bright color palette is now CalArts</s> is the cancer that is killing /co/ and is destroying everything we once held dear. God help us.
|-
|-
|align="center" | 22
|align="center" | 17
|align="center" | '''{{greentext|>My Frank When}}'''
|align="center"|{{Position|DMF}}
|align="center"|[[File:Cooking_with_dog.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''Literally Me'''
| {{greentext|>my frank when}}
|align="center"|[[File:literally me.jpg|x200px]]
|align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
| Originated from "ITT: Characters that are literally you" threads on /co/. Every thread had this image
|&mdash;
| This player has been described as intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of humor
|-
|-
|colspan=6 style="background:#95B3D7;"|<h4>Attacking Midfield</h4>
|align="center" | 13
|-
|align="center"|{{Position|CMF}}
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | 11
|align="center" | '''Bad News'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''Archer'''
|align="center"|[[File:he's bad news.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:Perfect_coffee.png|x100px]]
| Titular character from newspaper comic called Heathcliff. Comics are [spoiler]LOL[/spoiler] tier funny
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | Archer's arrival onto the squad coincided with the Dragongate scandal. Rumors are going around that ISIS sent him to investigate for the 4chan cup for undiscovered Dragonfag identities. Oddly, he doesn't deny it and openly gloats about how he's an agent while hitting on his female squadmates. Having once a top college lacrosse player, Archer translates those abilites to onto the pitch as a dangerous addition to the squad. Other teams should call Kenny Loggins, they'll soon be entering the danger zone.
| He's bad news
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" |
|-
|-
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | 8
|align="center" | 5
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''/co/lette''' (Captain)
|align="center"|{{Position|CMF}}
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:Best_ramen_ever.png|x100px]]
|align="center" | '''Archer'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | Showing fantastic leadership and skill behind the scenes and during the off season, /co/lette has taken on the role of the club's captain and attacking midfielder. She is still /co/'s perfect brown waifu and looks forward to bringing JUSTICE to the pitch with the rest of the club's players at her side.
|align="center"|[[File:archer.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''Morelia NEO'''
| Titular character of FX animated show Archer
|style="background: #C0C0C0" |
| Archer's arrival onto the squad coincided with the Dragongate scandal. Rumors are going around that ISIS sent him to investigate for the 4chan cup for undiscovered Dragonfag identities. Oddly, he doesn't deny it and openly gloats about how he's an agent while hitting on his female squad mates. Having once a top college lacrosse player, Archer translates those abilities to onto the pitch as a dangerous addition to the squad. Other teams should call Kenny Loggins, they'll soon be entering the danger zone.  
|-
|-
|}
|}


<h3>Center Forwards</h3>
<h3>Forwards</h3>
{|{{Prettytable}}
{|{{Prettytable}}
|-
|-
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''No.'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Pos'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Name'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="1%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Picture'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Origin'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="40%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Description'''
|width="15%" style="background:#DBE5F1;" | '''Boots'''
|-
|width="10%" style="background:#DBE5F1;"|'''Card(s)'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | 10
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center"|{{Position|SS}}
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''The Flash'''
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:the_flash.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | It's the fucking Flash.
|style="background: #C0C0C0" | The fastest man alive is... well not so fast anymore. After a horrendous cup performance being brought back in as /co/'s striker, Wally West was eventually sacked for Barry Allan. He has already been told to lay off the speed and just focus on helping the team in the midfield
|-
|-
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | 9
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | 9
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center"|{{Position|CF}}
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''Tucker'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''Tucker'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | [[File:Pink_himalayan_salt.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | [[File:tucker.jpg|x200px]]
|style="background: #EDDA74" | This is Tucker. He would've been last year's league MVP if it wasn't for {{greentext|>rigging}}. Now for all intensive purposes, /co/'s strategy will consist of thus; give the ball to Tucker.
|style="background: #EDDA74" | Comes from a "Hey Arnold" episode where Tucker's dad, a basketball coach, orders all players to give the ball to Tucker despite his bad performance. <s>Although he's gold now so that doesn't matter.</s>
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''Total 90 Laser IV'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" | This is Tucker. <s>Why is a basketball player on a football team?</s> He would've been last year's league MVP if it wasn't for {{greentext|>rigging}}. Now for all intents and purposes, /co/'s strategy will consist of thus; give the ball to Tucker.  
|style="background: #EDDA74" |
|-
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | 10
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''The Flash'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" |[[File:Nachos.png|x100px]]
|style="background: #EDDA74" | The fastest man alive is back. Now that the 4chan Cup's restriction on the Speed Force has been lifted, The Flash feels new air as he rejoins Tucker as his fellow co-striker
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''WEPES SP1000'''
|style="background: #EDDA74" |
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|}
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[[Category:Official team rosters|co]]

Latest revision as of 01:44, 10 January 2022

Back to /co/'s main page

Accurate as of January 2022. If anything here is wrong it's >(You)r fault.

Sub Starter Silver Gold


Goalkeeper

No. Pos. Name Picture Origin Description
52
  GK
Hypercrisis Hypercrisis.jpg /co/ fan theory about how all of Grant Morrison's works connect Yes, it's as stupid as it sounds

Defenders

No. Pos. Name Picture Origin Description
2
  LB
Dead Parents Dead parents.jpg Batman's origin that his parents are dead. His parents are deaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad!!
1
  CB
Judge Dredd Dredd.jpg Character from 2000 AD comics, the law Scoring goals is 20 years in the cube, creep!
14
  CB
Alan Moore Alan moore.jpg Famous for writer of The Watchmen. Looks like a wizard. Arguably still coasting off of his success in the Watchmen's Football Club, Alan is known for getting into disputes with other player's over creator ownership. His narcissistic attitude is only matched by his short flashes of brilliance, reminiscent of his younger self.
6
  RB
Rightclops Rightclops.jpg From the "Cyclops Was Right" movement, itself an offshoot of "Magneto Was Right", where X-Men hero-turned-villain Cyclops resorts to any method to ensure peace for his fellow Mutants. Scott Summers, aka Cyclops will be racing up the field aided by his signature punches from the punch dimension. When it comes to making passes, this guy is always right.
15
  LB
T.O.M. Tom.jpg Host of the Toonami block on [adult swim] A fan favorite, T.O.M.'s return has sparked the weekly practice among /co/ management to drink heavily to forget you're watching shit
12
  LB
Carlos! Carlos.jpg Infamous Magic School Bus character. Whenever a pun is brewing, you can probably guess which cheeky Mexican fuck posted it CARLOS!
69
  CB
Sexism Sexism.jpeg The trend in western comics which makes strong, independent female characters SEXY AS HELL A player all fans can identify with. Sexism rose through the ranks of the youth squads and was even a member of the Red Hood Supporter's Club.
4
  CB
Superdickery Superdickery.jpg Comes from Silver Age comic covers featuring Superman being a dick out of context. Basically pre-internet clickbait. JIMMY, this gift you got me for FATHER'S DAY makes me sorry I ever adopted you as my son. I'll have to DESTROY IT to teach you A LESSON!
21
  CB
That's My Purse Mypurse.jpg Line from a King of the Hill episode where Bobby enrolls in a woman's self defense course. Hilarity ensures I DON'T KNOW YOU
34
  RB
Donald Donald.jpg Comes from a thread where OP confuses Arthur for "Donald". This was the height of comedy in 2014. /co/ continues to repeat this joke every few months while oldfags cringe and wish tourists didn't fall for this shit bait
3
  RB
Win O' Thread Win o thread.jpg A weekly thread where /co/mardes come to dump the latest issues of new comics in an easily to download format. Win O'Thread is a popular player known for his good relations with /co/'s supporter group. Though gifted with natural talent he's been accused of not doing enough to support the industr…err team.

Midfield

No. Pos Name Picture Origin Description
Frank
  DMF
>My Frank When My frank when.png Ancient /co/ meme where someone cropped a face from Steve Dillon's art of The Punisher (properly called Frank Face) and typed >My Frank When >My Frank When
40
  CMF
40 Cakes 40 cakes.jpg A meme originating from a DC dictionary for kids. 40 Cakes has stolen 40 balls from opponents. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.
7
  CMF
/co/lette Colette.jpg /co/ original creation. A mix of traits from /co/'s different waifus Showing fantastic leadership and skill behind the scenes and during the off season, /co/lette has taken on the role of the club's new central striker. She is still /co/'s perfect brown waifu and looks forward to bringing JUSTICE to the pitch with the rest of the club's players at her side.
11
  AMF
Doom Captain Doom.jpg Main antagonist savior of the Fantastic Four series from Marvel. Doctor Doom is adored by fans, but rarely ever reciprocates any emotion. Known for his signature "Richards" shout as a goal celebration, many up and coming athletes admire him for his discipline and perseverance. After a failure of a team for multiple cups in a row, Doom has finally taken the team into his own hands.
19
  DMF
Mr. Meeseeks Mr meeseeks.png Character from Rick and Morty, whose purpose is to fulfill a single request from its creator and then disappear immediately. Apparently /co/ has a slave army of these things. I'M MR. MEESEEKS. LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
16
  DMF
CalArts Style Cal arts.jpg Recent Omnipresent trend in style of cartoons named after the animation school of CalArts, involves very noodly limbs, simplistic styles, thin lines, and bean mouths First became a meme in 2016 when the Powerpuff Girls reboot raped your childhood, then again in 2018 after Thundercats Roar raped another demographic of childhoods. As of 2022 the trend shows no sign of stopping, extending even to 3D animation. However, "CalArts Style" as a criticism is functionally meaningless due to the endless variety of shows it is labelled with to the point where any show with rounded character designs or a bright color palette is now CalArts is the cancer that is killing /co/ and is destroying everything we once held dear. God help us.
17
  DMF
Literally Me Literally me.jpg Originated from "ITT: Characters that are literally you" threads on /co/. Every thread had this image This player has been described as intelligent, nihilistic and with a wicked sense of humor
13
  CMF
Bad News He's bad news.jpg Titular character from newspaper comic called Heathcliff. Comics are [spoiler]LOL[/spoiler] tier funny He's bad news
5
  CMF
Archer Archer.jpg Titular character of FX animated show Archer Archer's arrival onto the squad coincided with the Dragongate scandal. Rumors are going around that ISIS sent him to investigate for the 4chan cup for undiscovered Dragonfag identities. Oddly, he doesn't deny it and openly gloats about how he's an agent while hitting on his female squad mates. Having once a top college lacrosse player, Archer translates those abilities to onto the pitch as a dangerous addition to the squad. Other teams should call Kenny Loggins, they'll soon be entering the danger zone.

Forwards

No. Pos Name Picture Origin Description
10
  SS
The Flash The flash.jpg It's the fucking Flash. The fastest man alive is... well not so fast anymore. After a horrendous cup performance being brought back in as /co/'s striker, Wally West was eventually sacked for Barry Allan. He has already been told to lay off the speed and just focus on helping the team in the midfield
9
  CF
Tucker Tucker.jpg Comes from a "Hey Arnold" episode where Tucker's dad, a basketball coach, orders all players to give the ball to Tucker despite his bad performance. Although he's gold now so that doesn't matter. This is Tucker. Why is a basketball player on a football team? He would've been last year's league MVP if it wasn't for >>rigging. Now for all intents and purposes, /co/'s strategy will consist of thus; give the ball to Tucker.