Difference between revisions of "/asp/ Roster"
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|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''VACANT''' | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''VACANT''' | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:VACANT.png|300px]] | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:VACANT.png|300px]] | ||
|style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center" |Many time world champion across many different federations, including the | |style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center" |Many time world champion across many different federations, including singlehandedly winning the 2012 Summer Cup. How does he keep doing it? | ||
|- | |- | ||
|align="center" | {{Position|GK}} | |align="center" | {{Position|GK}} | ||
|align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''Zorb''' | ||
|align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:Zorb.png|300px|]] | ||
|align="center" | | |align="center" | I'M JUST A ZORBY BOY<br>zorby booooooooy<br>IT'S NOT A KIDS TOY<br>kiiiiiiids tooooooooy | ||
|- | |- | ||
|} | |} | ||
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|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Big Poppa Pump''' | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Big Poppa Pump''' | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Big Poppa Pump.jpg|300px]] | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:Big Poppa Pump.jpg|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | You know they say that all men are created equal, but you look at me and you look at Samoa Joe and you can see that statement is not true. See, normally if you go one on one with another wrestler, you got a 50/50 chance of winning. But I'm a genetic freak and I'm not normal! So you got a 25%, AT BEST, at beat me. Then you add Kurt Angle to the mix? Your chances of winning drastic go down. See the 3 way, at Sacrifice, you got a 33 1/3 chance of winning. But I! I got a 66 and 2/3 chance of winning, because Kurt Angle KNOWS he can't beat me and he's not even gonna try! So Samoa Joe, you take your 33 1/3 chance, minus my 25% chance, and you got an 8 1/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. But then you take my 75% chance of winning, if we was to go one on one, and then add 66 2/3 per cents, I got 141 2/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. Senior Joe? The numbers don't lie, and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice. | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | You know they say that all men are created equal, but you look at me and you look at Samoa Joe and you can see that statement is not true. See, normally if you go one on one with another wrestler, you got a 50/50 chance of winning. But I'm a genetic freak and I'm not normal! So you got a 25%, AT BEST, at beat me. Then you add Kurt Angle to the mix? Your chances of winning drastic go down. See the 3 way, at Sacrifice, you got a 33 1/3 chance of winning. But I! I got a 66 and 2/3 chance of winning, because Kurt Angle KNOWS he can't beat me and he's not even gonna try! So Samoa Joe, you take your 33 1/3 chance, minus my 25% chance, and you got an 8 1/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. But then you take my 75% chance of winning, if we was to go one on one, and then add 66 2/3 per cents, I got 141 2/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. Senior Joe? The numbers don't lie, and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | ''' | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Take a Bump''' | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"| [[File: | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"| [[File:Take a Bump.png|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | 4CC, get in the ring, take a bump. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | ''' | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Bruce Lee''' | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File: | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center"| [[File:Bruce Lee.jpg|300px]] | ||
|style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center" | | |style="background:#C3D69B;" align="center"| Arguably the most famous martial artist who ever lived and a longtime /asp/ regular, Bruce Lee's deft skills with his feet will no doubt come in handy on the field.<br/><br/>Flow like water, my friend. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|LB}} | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|LB}} | ||
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|align="center" | [[File:Rakesh Kumar Orton.png|300px]] | |align="center" | [[File:Rakesh Kumar Orton.png|300px]] | ||
|align="center" | /asp/ is generally not the biggest fans of Randy Orton. He's boring, stale, slow, and rarely puts any effort in. Rakesh Kumar Orton, however, is a different story. One of the main attractions of Indian backstreet independent promotion AngaarTV, Rakesh is an unquestioned improvement on the original. He may look like a twig, but you better not underestimate him. | |align="center" | /asp/ is generally not the biggest fans of Randy Orton. He's boring, stale, slow, and rarely puts any effort in. Rakesh Kumar Orton, however, is a different story. One of the main attractions of Indian backstreet independent promotion AngaarTV, Rakesh is an unquestioned improvement on the original. He may look like a twig, but you better not underestimate him. | ||
|- | |||
|align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | |||
|align="center" | '''Jannetty''' | |||
|align="center" | [[File:Marty Jannetty.jpg|300px]] | |||
|align="center" | The not-Shawn Michaels half of The Rockers. He is the poster child for /asp/'s fascination with analyzing the individual members of tag teams in various forms of media and trying to find out which one is destined for stardom, and which one will be left in the dust, AKA the Jannetty. | |||
|- | |- | ||
|align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | |align="center" | {{Position|CB}} | ||
|align="center" | '''{{greentext|airshit}}''' | |align="center" | '''{{greentext|airshit}}''' | ||
|align="center"| [[File:Airshit.jpg| | |align="center" | [[File:Airshit.jpg|300px]] | ||
|align="center"| While the team around him has slowly grown more and more wrestling-centric over time, Airshit still remains a familiar face in the backline of the defense, doing what he can to help the team win with his tacticool genes guiding the influx of new players | |align="center" | While the team around him has slowly grown more and more wrestling-centric over time, Airshit still remains a familiar face in the backline of the defense, doing what he can to help the team win with his tacticool genes guiding the influx of new players. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| align="center" | {{Position| | |align="center" | {{Position|LB}} | ||
| align="center" | '''Big | |align="center" | '''Big Knife Manju''' | ||
| align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:Big Knife Manju.png|300px]] | ||
| align="center" | | |align="center" | An avid fan of The Big Dog, Manju was hired to take his place on the backline. With his big knife in hand, no one will get past him <br><br> (no it isn't a fucking tear in the fabric it's his knife are you blind?) | ||
|- | |- | ||
|align="center" | {{Position|LB}} | |||
|align="center" | '''Krispen Wah''' | |||
|align="center" | [[File:KrispenWah.jpg|300px]] | |||
|align="center" | Who is this Krispen Wah guy? Never heard of him. He is definitely not a former World Champion and Royal Rumble winner. | |||
|} | |} | ||
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|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|DMF}} | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | {{Position|DMF}} | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Bork Lazer''' | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | '''Bork Lazer''' | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:BorkLazer.png| | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | [[File:BorkLazer.png|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | | |style="background: #C3D69B" align="center" | A year-plus long reign as champion has finally come to an end, but this hasn't stopped Bork. With his unique position as both an active WWE wrestler and a UFC heavyweight contender, Bork is one of the few remaining roster members representing both the new and classic eras of /asp/, at least for now. Whether he'll remain relevant after his fight with Daniel Cormier remains to be seen. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | |style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | ||
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | ''' | |style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | '''Big Bible AJ''' | ||
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | [[File: | |style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | [[File:Big Bible AJ.png|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | | |style="background: #EDDA74" align="center" | A long-time champion of the show that secured a several-billion dollar broadcasting deal with FOX, it could be argued that AJ Styles is the biggest dime-drawer in modern WWE today. The power of God, dimes, and his files has propelled AJ into being the star of both Smackdown and the /asp/ roster. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | '''DEAN''' | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | [[File:DEAN.jpg|300px]] | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" |DEAN, TELL ME ABOUT HOW YOUR FATHER SODOMIZED YOU WITH A PITCHFORK IN YOUR TEENS AND DROVE YOU TO DRINK, DEAN. GIVE IT TO THE PEOPLE, IT'S WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | {{Position|AMF}} | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | {{Position|AMF}} | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | ''' | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''Dimes''' | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File: | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:Dimes.png|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | HOLY FUCKING DIMES. <br><br> The true mark of any great wrestler is how many dimes you can draw. It is the ultimate status symbol in the industry. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| align="center" | {{Position|DMF}} | |align="center" | {{Position|DMF}} | ||
| align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''BRAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN''' | ||
| align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:BRAAAAUUUUUUUNN.png|300px]] | ||
| align="center" | | |align="center" |It's been an interesting period for Braun Strowman over the past few months. While he's been able to win some illustrious prizes like the Greatest Royal Rumble, the Raw Tag Team Championships, and the Money in the Bank briefcase, he's still been stymied by Roman Reigns when it comes to getting the grand prize. With a renewed aggression, his anger will help secure the deep middle of the pitch. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | |align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | ||
| align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''SEETHING''' | ||
| align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:SEETHING.jpg|300px]] | ||
| align="center" | | |align="center" | The biggest sin you could commit on /asp/ is to work yourself into a SEETHING shoot. It's just wrestling, anon. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | |align="center" | {{Position|CMF}} | ||
|align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''Ding-Dong Diddly''' | ||
|align="center"| [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:Ding-Dong Diddly.png|300px]] | ||
|align="center"| | |align="center" | What was originally intended to be a word filter for "finna" has now become a permanent part of /asp/ lingo. Ding-dong diddly BASED. | ||
|- | |- | ||
| align="center" | {{Position| | |align="center" | {{Position|RMF}} | ||
| align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''Tony Hawk''' | ||
| align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:Tony Hawk.jpg|300px]] | ||
| align="center" | | |align="center" | When you think of skateboarding, the first thing that comes to mind is how long ago the 90's were. But the second thing that comes to mind is Tony Hawk, one of the pioneers of the sport that brought it into its golden age and made it popular in the first place. While he's been retired from actively competing for quite some time now, he still remains the most famous skateboarder of all time and the icon of the industry. [https://twitter.com/tonyhawk/status/5184156673?lang=en Too bad people at airports keep forgetting he exists.] | ||
|- | |- | ||
| align="center" | {{Position| | |align="center" | {{Position|LMF}} | ||
| align="center" | ''' | |align="center" | '''Jimmy Ocean''' | ||
| align="center" | [[File: | |align="center" | [[File:Jimmy Ocean.jpg|300px]] | ||
| align="center" | | |align="center" | A recurring general on /asp/ is dedicated to the exploits of WAW, a British independent federation filled with your favorite slags, geezers, and pork faggot recipes. Featuring stars like Sonny Smasher, Malky Taggart, and even Mr. Anderson, Gentleman Jimmy is here to carry the torch for his homeland. | ||
|} | |} | ||
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|- | |- | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | {{Position|CF}} | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | {{Position|CF}} | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | ''' | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | '''Hollywood John''' | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File: | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | [[File:CENAWINSLOL2.jpg|300px]] | ||
|style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" | | |style="background: #C0C0C0" align="center" |He is a record tying 13-time WWE champion, 3-time World Heavyweight champion, 2-time Royal Rumble winner, 8-time WWE Slammy Award winner and a numerous time holder of some unimportant championships. He is the most divisive player in WWE and 4CC history. He is the ultimate underdog. He...actually hasn't been around for awhile. Still, regardless of how long it's been since he's been in the ring, John Cena IS /asp/. Powered by a mixture of sheer willpower and Fruity Pebbles, he is here to add some divegrass trophies to his list of accolades. Who wins LOL?<br>CENAWINSLOL. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | {{Position|SS}} | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | '''Undercarder''' | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | [[File:Undercarder.jpg|300px]] | ||
|style="background: # | |style="background: #CD7F32" align="center" | There are few things that are truly badass. There's me, the Undercarder, the American Badass. There's Big Bible AJ, mmmmm you don't wanna mess with him. There's the Cenas, the Dimes, the DEANs. And then there are those who play divegrass in the 4chan Cup. To the man, they're bad to the bone. | ||
|- | |- | ||
|align="center" | {{Position|SS}} | |||
|align="center" | '''Kemonito''' | |||
|align="center" | [[File:Kemonito.jpg|300px]] | |||
|align="center" | ¡Ay, Dios mio! ¡Es Senor Dimes, Kemonito!<br>You've probably seen that one gif of the blue midget monkey getting dropkicked out of the ring. That's Kemonito. Willing to put his body on the line for los tecnicos, Kemonito is one of the main reasons to start watching CMLL. | |||
|} | |||
[[Category:Official team rosters|asp]] | [[Category:Official team rosters|asp]] |
Revision as of 21:56, 6 September 2018
Sub | Starter | Silver | Gold |
Goalkeepers
Defenders
Pos. | Name | Picture | Description | ||
|
Big Poppa Pump | You know they say that all men are created equal, but you look at me and you look at Samoa Joe and you can see that statement is not true. See, normally if you go one on one with another wrestler, you got a 50/50 chance of winning. But I'm a genetic freak and I'm not normal! So you got a 25%, AT BEST, at beat me. Then you add Kurt Angle to the mix? Your chances of winning drastic go down. See the 3 way, at Sacrifice, you got a 33 1/3 chance of winning. But I! I got a 66 and 2/3 chance of winning, because Kurt Angle KNOWS he can't beat me and he's not even gonna try! So Samoa Joe, you take your 33 1/3 chance, minus my 25% chance, and you got an 8 1/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. But then you take my 75% chance of winning, if we was to go one on one, and then add 66 2/3 per cents, I got 141 2/3 chance of winning at Sacrifice. Senior Joe? The numbers don't lie, and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice. | |||
|
Take a Bump | 4CC, get in the ring, take a bump. | |||
|
Bruce Lee | Arguably the most famous martial artist who ever lived and a longtime /asp/ regular, Bruce Lee's deft skills with his feet will no doubt come in handy on the field. Flow like water, my friend. | |||
|
Worked Into a Shoot | Goodnight HULKAMANIACS and jabronie marks without a life that don't know it a work when you work a work and work yourself into a shoot,marks | |||
|
Rakesh Kumar Orton | /asp/ is generally not the biggest fans of Randy Orton. He's boring, stale, slow, and rarely puts any effort in. Rakesh Kumar Orton, however, is a different story. One of the main attractions of Indian backstreet independent promotion AngaarTV, Rakesh is an unquestioned improvement on the original. He may look like a twig, but you better not underestimate him. | |||
|
Jannetty | The not-Shawn Michaels half of The Rockers. He is the poster child for /asp/'s fascination with analyzing the individual members of tag teams in various forms of media and trying to find out which one is destined for stardom, and which one will be left in the dust, AKA the Jannetty. | |||
|
>airshit | While the team around him has slowly grown more and more wrestling-centric over time, Airshit still remains a familiar face in the backline of the defense, doing what he can to help the team win with his tacticool genes guiding the influx of new players. | |||
|
Big Knife Manju | An avid fan of The Big Dog, Manju was hired to take his place on the backline. With his big knife in hand, no one will get past him (no it isn't a fucking tear in the fabric it's his knife are you blind?) | |||
|
Krispen Wah | Who is this Krispen Wah guy? Never heard of him. He is definitely not a former World Champion and Royal Rumble winner. |
Midfielders
Pos. | Name | Picture | Description | ||
|
Bork Lazer | A year-plus long reign as champion has finally come to an end, but this hasn't stopped Bork. With his unique position as both an active WWE wrestler and a UFC heavyweight contender, Bork is one of the few remaining roster members representing both the new and classic eras of /asp/, at least for now. Whether he'll remain relevant after his fight with Daniel Cormier remains to be seen. | |||
|
Big Bible AJ | A long-time champion of the show that secured a several-billion dollar broadcasting deal with FOX, it could be argued that AJ Styles is the biggest dime-drawer in modern WWE today. The power of God, dimes, and his files has propelled AJ into being the star of both Smackdown and the /asp/ roster. | |||
|
DEAN | DEAN, TELL ME ABOUT HOW YOUR FATHER SODOMIZED YOU WITH A PITCHFORK IN YOUR TEENS AND DROVE YOU TO DRINK, DEAN. GIVE IT TO THE PEOPLE, IT'S WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR. | |||
|
Dimes | HOLY FUCKING DIMES. The true mark of any great wrestler is how many dimes you can draw. It is the ultimate status symbol in the industry. | |||
|
BRAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN | It's been an interesting period for Braun Strowman over the past few months. While he's been able to win some illustrious prizes like the Greatest Royal Rumble, the Raw Tag Team Championships, and the Money in the Bank briefcase, he's still been stymied by Roman Reigns when it comes to getting the grand prize. With a renewed aggression, his anger will help secure the deep middle of the pitch. | |||
|
SEETHING | The biggest sin you could commit on /asp/ is to work yourself into a SEETHING shoot. It's just wrestling, anon. | |||
|
Ding-Dong Diddly | What was originally intended to be a word filter for "finna" has now become a permanent part of /asp/ lingo. Ding-dong diddly BASED. | |||
|
Tony Hawk | When you think of skateboarding, the first thing that comes to mind is how long ago the 90's were. But the second thing that comes to mind is Tony Hawk, one of the pioneers of the sport that brought it into its golden age and made it popular in the first place. While he's been retired from actively competing for quite some time now, he still remains the most famous skateboarder of all time and the icon of the industry. Too bad people at airports keep forgetting he exists. | |||
|
Jimmy Ocean | A recurring general on /asp/ is dedicated to the exploits of WAW, a British independent federation filled with your favorite slags, geezers, and pork faggot recipes. Featuring stars like Sonny Smasher, Malky Taggart, and even Mr. Anderson, Gentleman Jimmy is here to carry the torch for his homeland. |
Attackers
Pos. | Name | Picture | Description | ||
|
Hollywood John | He is a record tying 13-time WWE champion, 3-time World Heavyweight champion, 2-time Royal Rumble winner, 8-time WWE Slammy Award winner and a numerous time holder of some unimportant championships. He is the most divisive player in WWE and 4CC history. He is the ultimate underdog. He...actually hasn't been around for awhile. Still, regardless of how long it's been since he's been in the ring, John Cena IS /asp/. Powered by a mixture of sheer willpower and Fruity Pebbles, he is here to add some divegrass trophies to his list of accolades. Who wins LOL? CENAWINSLOL. | |||
|
Undercarder | There are few things that are truly badass. There's me, the Undercarder, the American Badass. There's Big Bible AJ, mmmmm you don't wanna mess with him. There's the Cenas, the Dimes, the DEANs. And then there are those who play divegrass in the 4chan Cup. To the man, they're bad to the bone. | |||
|
Kemonito | ¡Ay, Dios mio! ¡Es Senor Dimes, Kemonito! You've probably seen that one gif of the blue midget monkey getting dropkicked out of the ring. That's Kemonito. Willing to put his body on the line for los tecnicos, Kemonito is one of the main reasons to start watching CMLL. |