/hr/ Roster
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Golds, Silvers, and Other Starters have the appropriate colored background.
Goalkeepers
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
/CEL/ | N/A | With celebrity content making up the majority of the threads on /hr/, it could be said that /hr/ has become /cel/, leaving almost any other content that you might want to see in high resolution blocked out. Hopefully this means he can also block balls from getting into the net. | 190 / 84 / R / #99 | ||
LANDSCAPE | Defensive Goalkeeper | He makes for an impressive vista, and hopefully that width and height will keep balls out of the net. | 182 / 85 / R / #14 | ||
CITYSCAPE | N/A | The sheer size of the city may leave you lost, and hopefully the opposition's hopes for goals will be lost as well. | 185 / 77 / R / #15 |
Center Back
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
ASTRONOMY | N/A | Possibly the only thing posted with regularity outside of celebrity threads and automobiles. his orbital tallness will help keep the center clear of flying balls. | 205 / 75 / R / #11 | P18 | |
USER WAS WARNED | N/A | Though his twin User Was Banned no longer plays for /hr/, he's refused to pick up the slack and is still content to just tell you how you screwed up handling the ball so you can avoid doing it next time. | 185 / 85 / R / #2 | ||
MILA KUNIS | N/A | She's been in a bunch of things you watched, but you just never noticed until you saw huge hot pictures of her. She seems to be hitting her stride lately, on and off the pitch, if you discount how much she works with Seth MacFarlane | 185 / 50 / R / #6 | ||
CELEB FAKES | N/A | You are not a master photoshopper and this is a high resolution board. We can tell. | 185 / 78 / R / #5 | ||
WIKIFEET | N/A | How is this not enough feet for you? | 172 / 78 / L / #4 | P11 |
Left Backs
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
Bully My Dick | Defensive Full-Back | K-pop group T-ara got caught in a Three's Company style bullying scandal. You don't care though, you just wanna oggle that tall girl with the nice long legs. | 181 / 50 / R / #6 | ||
XTREME VAGINA CLOSEUPS | Defensive Full-back | It was pretty much a given somebody would want to post this sooner or later. No, he's not getting an in game face. | 185 / 78 / L / #98 |
Right Backs
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
MOVIE POSTERS | The Instigator | Utilizes the power of orange blue contrast to stun his opponents into turning over the ball. | 176 / 75 / R / #25 | C06, P05 | |
SUMMER GLAU | The Instigator | Some anon is very convinced she needs a daily thread on /hr/, but geek icon status does not make you a stater. | 181 / 74 / R / #9 | C06, P05 |
Defending Midfielders
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
EMMA STONE | The Destroyer | Like Mila, you've seen her in a lot of things, and her on field performance is invigorating. If only she'd pick which hair color to stick with. On the pitch she goes with a classic dark red. | 181 / 52 / R / #22 | C07, P11 | |
CURRENCY | The Destroyer | Do you need more money in resolution so large you can see all the specks of dirt and micro-scratches? Sure, we all do! | 180 / 72 / R / #97 | ||
FOOD PORN | The Destroyer | More innocent than you'd be led to believe, just enjoy some detailed pictures of food that will make your mouth water and maybe, just maybe, give you a boner. | 170 / 65 / R / #23 |
Center Midfielders
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
LORD TAENGOO | Box-to-Box | K-pop star Taeyeon, SNSD stater by request of the fans. | 193 / 72 / R / #24 | C06, P10, P14 | |
NUGU | Box-to-Box | "Who? Get your unknown shit nugu band out of K-pop General!" | 181 / 50 / R / #6 | C06, P10 | |
>1000x1000 | Box-to-Box | The minimum size of images postable to /hr/. His contract forces him to move to /p/ if he gets any smaller. | 175 / 77 / L / #7 | P10 | |
PICTURES OF HITLER | N/A | Look we get that you said World War 2 thread, and those are some very impressive period jeeps you lead off with, but we know you're just fishing for somebody to post high resolution pictures of Hitler. | 169 / 75 / R / #20 |
Attacking Midfielders
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
HAUNTED AREUM | Hole Player | Former member of T-ara. Please stop spreading rumors that she is possessed by spirits. | 185 / 66 / R / #12 | C06, P10, P12 | |
3 GALLONS PER TIT | Dummy Runner | Anon asked how much milk K-pop star Yura had per tit. He received a pretty definitive answer. | 180 / 77 / L / #18 |
Second Strikers
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
EMMA WATSON | N/A | A long time 4chan fixation, Emma is no stranger to the gawking of fans. Able to operate under that kind of pressure, she keeps playing solid but quiet gold midfielding. | 179 / 41 / L / #8 | C01, P03, P08, P13, P19 |
Center Forwards
Name | Image | Playing Style | Description | Height / Weight / Foot / # | Skill cards |
---|---|---|---|---|---|
TAYLOR SWIFT | Fox in the Box | Singer, songwriter, gold second striker. She's all but officially /hr/'s goddess. Pray for goals and to avoid having a song written about how much the rest of the team sucks. | 195 / 61 / R / #13 | C03, C07, P09, P18 |
Former Team Members
Name | Description |
---|---|
not /r/ | Quietly let go from the team after a scandal proved he was also playing for /s/ on the side. |
Yuri's Thighs | Fired for being perfect, 10/10. But seriously, the kpop references needed to be a little less generic than this. |
Victoria Justice | Fired to make room for Bully My Dick, and by fired we mean bullied out of the way. |
>700x700 | Swallowed whole by his bigger brother. |
Wildscreen | Seriously, wtf is was a wildscreen? |
User Was Banned | Player was... you know. |
Max Image Limit | Died a slow death upon reaching page 10. |
>SHE WILL NEVER KNOW | Being a sub of a medal, management forgot he was even on the team. |