/sg/

Syria General - /sg/ is the /pol/ General that follows the Syrian war against terrorism, as well as all the conflicts taking place all around the world. Syria General sees the bigger picture behind all this: the global geopolitical struggle of the the USA and the Russia-led anti-western axis, be it in Iraq, Yemen, Ukraine, Lybia or Afghanistan. Also, we talk about Arab grammar, Levantine cuties and Mediterranean breakfasts.

With the based Syrian Arab Army retaking their country village by village, /sg/ is hoping to make some GAINZ in the world of divegrass too.

/sg/
ALLAH SOURIA BASHAR OU BAS
/sg/ - Syria General
Founded 28 September 1961 Manager Qasem "The Shadow Commader" Soleimani Owner Assad Bakeries & Co. IRL manager MS Team colors Chat color CE1126 Ba'athist Red Top scorer () Top assister N/A (N/A) Captain Assad Wins Again Website /sg/ - Syria General Nickname Arab Secularists
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY 0 0 0 0 0%
GF GA GD 0 0 0
Biggest win TBD  –  TBD Biggest defeat TBD  –  TBD First match TBD  –  TBD 8 July, 2017
Team music
Anthem Good Morning Syria Victory Anthem Ali Madad, Ali Bakarat Assad Wins Again MOTM victory anthem Syrian national anthem Russian Liberator MOTM victory anthem Katyusha - Red army choir Goal horn Syrian circulation GH when facing /ptg/ We will strike a blow at Tel Aviv Assad Wins Again horn Ya Bashar Russian Liberator horn Russian national anthem The Fabulous Tiger hat-trick horn Eye of the Tiger
Kits

Team

No. Position Player   GK The Druze Beast   CB ISIS Airforce   CB Mosul Meatgrinder   CB Do it for Dima   DMF SAAnime   CMF Assad Wins Again   LMF Barrelbomb   RMF Doctor MANPADS   AMF Russian Liberator   SS MAD GAINZ   CF The Fabulous Tiger

No. Position Player   GK SOON   CB Muh 4-D Chess   CB Last Bakery   CB >Ukrainian """""Military"""""   CB Jihadi Julian   CB Erdogan's Hopes and Dreams   DMF Hezbollah Pepe   DMF Miss me yet?   LMF Kurdish Armored Infantry   LMF Tochka Houthis   RMF Idlib Express   RMF Eagles of Whirlwind

Sub

Starter

Silver

Gold

Goalkeepers

Pos.	Name	Picture	Description
GK	The Druze Beast		Issam Zahreddine, the legendary defender of Deir-ez-Eor and all-round alpha-male Druze beast. Eats ISIS jihadis for breakfast and feasts on ruined Coalition dreams of partition as they fail daily to wrest DeZ from the iron grip of Issam and his Republican Guards
GK	SOON		A phrase often shouted on /sg/, as it heralds future gains, offensives and campaigns by the SAA and their allies. Not only that, but it's also said when there's potential happenings in other places in the MENA region, such as the coup in Turkroachistan and the Qatar crisis. Posters usually ask whether something will happen in the future by saying "X WHEN?" and almost instantly get a reply: "S O O N". "SOON" has proven to have prophetic properties, since /sg/ managed to predict events such as the liberation of Aleppo, Palmyra, Latakia and many other strategic locations. IDLIB AND DEZ SOON!

Defenders

Pos.	Name	Picture	Description
CB	ISIS Air Force		So advanced it strikes from the ground (VBIED) only sometimes taking flight, usually from it's safest airfields near Tel Aviv.
CB	Mosul meatgrinder		The tough and steely determination of the Iraqi PMUs. They ground ISIS down across Iraq and they'll grind your offensives too.
CB	Do it for Dima		The waifu of /sg/. All who's hearts are not gained by Suheil are surely swept away by Dima. Surely there is no better waifu to fight for?
CB	Muh 4-D Chess		They always insist on it whenever they show up in /sg/, somehow the latest 59 Tomahawk missiles are all part of 'muh 4-D chess' by Trump to somehow stick to his anti-intervention promises of the election campaign. Sadly, while /ptg/ remain the general of blind optimism, /sg/ is the general of realism where many have since lost the hope and optimism of November 9th 2016 marking a new era in geopolitics
CB	Last Bakery		No bakery can survive Assad's reign of barrel-bombing terror, but it appears one slipped through the net. During the Aleppo campaign alone there was an average of 1 last bakery left every day, accodrding to credible western and opposition sources - all bombed to smithereens by Assad from his private helicopter, along with the occasional hospital, school or kitten sanctuary
CB	>Ukrainian """Military"""		A remnant from the good old days when /ug/ Ukraine General was still a thing. The Hohol (Ukrainian) army is notorious for being almost Arab-tier in terms of getting BTFO by miners, mechanics, a car-washing dwarf and a tall Abkhasian guy with a funny nickname (and maybe some Russian Liberator help). We have all seen plenty of videos showcasing the incompetence of the Hohol army both whilst fighting and whilst being away from the front line. Seeing as both Ukrainian and Syrian conflicts are geopolitically connected and are notorious for how shitty the forces of the participants are, we'd like to honor the general that is considered to be the daddy of /sg/
CB	Jihadi Julian		Notorious German Liberal Islamist who works for the BILD propaganda magazine, who is known for supporting the most ruthless Islamist factions in the Syrian civil war, including ISIS, whilst also being suppportive of western liberal values, especially gay rights. It is our theory that Jihadi Julian has a personality disorder and that his blind hate for Russia and Assad makes him support all this Salafii scum, seeing as he always goes out of his way to prove to everyone that all harm caused by non-Assad forces is accidental, whilst Assad kills for pleasure (Don't try arguing with him though, he'll block you). /sg/ hs a lot of fun trolling him with dank maymays and by registering his email on gay porn and islamist websites.
CB	Erdogan's Hopes and Dreams		The Roach Emperor is ready, after his false-flagged coup, to be officially declared Sultan. Hell-bent on recreating the Ottoman Empire, his diplomatic schizophrenia and personal moderate jihadists© are however making this task a lot harder. The question remains: what the hell does "cCc amk cCc" mean?

Midfielders

Pos.	Name	Picture	Description
DMF	SAAnime		needs entry
CMF	Assad Wins Again		Bashar al-Assad, the un-Mossaded one and rightful President of Syria. Everyone tries to get rid of him, everyone says 'Assad must go' but yet he survives it all. Many a foreign leader has fallen to the Curse of Assad after they utter those cursed words and still he remains. A living testament for all that you can't Mossad the Assad
LMF	Barrelbomb		Slayer of hospitals, children’s hospitals, doctors clinics, bakeries and kitten and puppy farms. Assad's barrel bombs ALWAYS find their way to the most heart-wrenching and distressing target without fail
RMF	Doctor MANPADS		Holywood's favourite humanitarian workers, by day they rescue innocent survivors of the super evil regime's hospital-seeking barrel bombs and endless gas attacks to the admiration of the Western media. But by night they dust out their anti-aircraft missiles and show us all what their real talents. Don't ask them about their offers on beheaded children
DMF	Hezbollah Pepe		The Middle East's finest merchant removal specialists. They have everything to be smug about having humiliated the IDF in 2006 and for their role in saving Assad from the powers of destruction on countless occasions. Ya Ali! Ya Zeinab! Ya Nasrallah!
DMF	Miss me yet?		This counts for all those ebil dictators the Neocons removed from power in their Israeli-advocated ZOG wars, such as Saddam, Ghaddaffi or Mohammad Najibullah. Now the nations they left behind lie in ruin and are being overrun by jihadi sand apes, which the USA either neglects or even sometimes arms in order to fight other jihadis. The people want them back, but would the US want them back too?
LMF	Kurdish Armoured Infantry		Kurdish 'tanks' roll all over the plains of Northern Syria. No-one quite knows how they function and no-one quite knows how they've come so far with them
LMF	Tochka Houthis		The legendary Houthi missile savants, no Saudi fighter or overpriced Western military hardware is safe from the unparalleled missile skills of /ourguys/ in Yemen. Houthis will find and destroy you with their missiles no matter how many proxies you hide behind.
RMF	Idlib Express		The green bus is the moderate jihadist's ultimate weapon once their pocket gets overrun by the SAA. Thanks to the power of NGO's and UN institutions these militants can freely move out of liberated territories and drive straight to Idlib where FSA factions are free to slaughter each other while displaying feats of takfirism that would put ISIS to shame. Assad personally chooses the driver amongst the trustiest /sg/ regulars
RMF	Eagles of Whirlwind		The Syrian Social-Nationalist Party, whose goal is to establish a Greater Syrian nation, directly colludes with the Ba'athist party when it comes to their core ideology. Nonetheless, both share ideals of secularism, nationalism, and anti-imperialism, which explains their decision to fight on the side of the government rather than the moderate jihadists'. With one of the most aesthetic flags in the Middle East and a support base consisting in large part of college upper-class Syrian qt's, they are a force to be reckoned in the conflict
AMF	Russian Liberator		Assad's guardian angel from Moscow. Just as everyone thought Assad was -actually- finished this time a light appeared from the north in 2015 and the Russians put an end to crush the rebels and end ISIS's dreams of further expansion. Truly the liberators Syria and what could have become another neocon'd failed state

Strikers

Pos.	Name	Picture	Description
SS	MAD GAINZ		The very fuel that keeps /sg/ going from day-to-day. There's nothing like an /sg/ bread when gainz are happening. Maybe it's a familiarity with map-painting games or just that we all have dangerously addictive personalities - gainz the crack coacaine of /sg/ that keeps everyone hooked and coming back for more. Expect huge gainz on the pitch from now on as /sg/ joins the fray. Your goal is not safe from our gainz
CF	The Fabulous Tiger		Suheil al-Hassan, the fabulous, poetic and immaculately well-groomed commander of /sg/'s favourite living meme; the Tiger Forces. The Tiger has proven himself over several years as one of Syria's finest generals, the bane of ISIS and crusher of rebel dreams. There is no greater meme unit than the Tigers when it comes to destroying jihadis of the name of Assad nor any more reliable provider our gainz fix. He has stolen not only victory from the jaws of defeat on many a front, but the hearts of many a handsome young Levantine twink

Match History

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers
8 July 2017	/TBD/	/pol/eague Group stage	TBD
9 July 2017	/TBD/	/pol/eague Group stage	TBD
9 July 2017	/TBD/	/pol/eague Group stage	TBD

Rivalries

/ptg/ - The 59 Missiles Derby /sg/ used to be cautiously optimistic towards Trump, hoping he'll de-escalate the situation in the Middle East. Then Trump broke all his promises and launched 59 missiles at the Shayrat airbase, and since /ptg/ are gullible fools that kept justifying the unjustifiable, /sg/ developped a hatred that quickly evolved into the pity one feels for a mentally impaired relative. Should /sg/ meet /ptg/ on the field, they'll prove the superiority of the helicopter-dropped barrel bomb over the uselessly expensive jewllistic missile.

0-0-0