Difference between revisions of "/jam/"

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{{BoardInfobox
{{SimpleBoardInfobox
|team= jam
|team= jam
|motto= {{tt|Slam cum optimis vel jam cum ceteris|Slam with the best or jam with the rest}}
|motto= {{tt|Slam cum optimis vel jam cum ceteris|Slam with the best or jam with the rest}}
|name= Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden
|name= Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden
|date= January 22, 2008  
|date= January 22, 2008  
|bgcolor= EF7C18
|bgcolor= E56020
|txtcolor=
|txtcolor= 1D1160
|manager= Chef Boyardee
|manager= Chef Boyardee
|owner= Tale of Game's Studios
|owner= Tale of Game's Studios
|irl={{Anonymous|Goodfellow}}
|color1= E56020
|color1= EF7C18
|color2= 1D1160
|color2= 000000
|hex= E56020
|ranking=
|color= B-Ball Orange
|high_ranking=
|scorer= Michael Jordan
|high_date=
|goals= 7
|low_ranking=  
|assister= Charles Barkley
|low_date=  
|assists= 6
|scorer=  
|goals=  
|assister=  
|assists=  
|captain= Charles Barkley
|captain= Charles Barkley
|hex= EF7C18
|4channel= no
|color= B-Ball Orange
|nickname= The B-Ballers
|home_ground=Charles Barkley Memorial Slamnasium
|w= 3
|d= 1
|l= 3
|gf= 19
|ga= 19
|win_home= balls
|win_away= jam
|win_score_home= 1
|win_score_away= 4
|win_date= August 27, 2023
|lose_home= cats&dogs
|lose_away= jam
|lose_score_home= 5
|lose_score_away= 3
|lose_date= August 31, 2024
|first_home= eggs
|first_away= jam
|first_score_home= 2
|first_score_away= 3
|first_date= August 25, 2023
|anthem= www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWKQiZVBtu4
|anthem= www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWKQiZVBtu4
|a_title= Theme (Space Jam)
|a_title= Theme (Space Jam)
|horn= www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qlNwDRgJPQ
|horn=youtube.com/watch?v=XoMaqxivvKY
|gh_title= Johnathan Taylor Thomas
|gh_title=Johnathan Taylor Thomas
|altgh1_what= Michael Jordan goal horn
|altgh1_what=Michael Jordan
|altgh1= www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBlsgXKHps0
|altgh1_title={{tt|jesus christ the guy from deep purple sang this|Eternity}}
|altgh1_title= {{tt|jesus christ the guy from deep purple sang this|Eternity}}
|althorn1=www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBlsgXKHps0
|altgh2= www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoATtrwzRE4
|altgh2_what=Alternate Goalhorn
|altgh2_title= Zalatar - Precious Pellets
|altgh2_title=Zalatar - Precious Pellets
|altgh3= www.youtube.com/watch?v=n785svhwonM
|althorn2=www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoATtrwzRE4
|altgh3_title= JTT2
|altgh3_what=Alternate Goalhorn
|nickname= The B-Ballers
|altgh3_title=JTT2
|home_ground=Charles Barkley Memorial Slamnasium
|althorn3=www.youtube.com/watch?v=n785svhwonM
}}<span style="font-size:150%">'''WARNING: The wiki page you are about to read is canon.'''</span>
}}<span style="font-size:150%">'''WARNING: The wiki page you are about to read is canon.'''</span>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
'''Tales of Game's Studios Presents Chef Boyardee's Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden, Chapter 1 of the Hoopz Barkley SaGa''' is a {{tt|freeware indie RPG|heavily inspired by Earthbound :^)}} set in post-cyberpocalyptic Neo New York, where basketball has become a capital offense after NBA superstar Charles Barkley performed a verboten Chaos Dunk during a game, inadvertently killing millions. <br> <br>
'''Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden''' is a {{tt|freeware indie RPG|heavily inspired by Earthbound :^)}} set in post-cyberpocalyptic Neo New York, where basketball has become a capital offense after NBA superstar Charles Barkley performed a verboten Chaos Dunk during a game, inadvertently killing millions. <br> <br>
Decades later, an aging Barkley is implicated in a massive conspiracy that leads him and his allies, including his auspicious son Hoopz, on a journey of redemption, hope, terrorism, 2000s internet humor, neo-shekels, and zaubers.
Decades later, an aging Barkley is implicated in a massive conspiracy that leads him and his allies, including his auspicious son Hoopz, on a journey of redemption, hope, terrorism, 2000s internet humor, neo-shekels, and zaubers.
<br><br>
<br><br>
Line 49: Line 65:
{{sq start}}
{{sq start}}
{{sq start player |no=33 |pos=GK |name=Father Larry Bird}}
{{sq start player |no=33 |pos=GK |name=Father Larry Bird}}
{{sq start player |no=61 |pos=LB |name=Ghost Dad}}
{{sq start player |no=55 |pos=CB |name={{tt|BOOM SHAKALAKA|Dikembe Mutombo}}}}
{{sq start player |no=2 |pos=CB |name=The Diabeastie}}
{{sq start player |no=2 |pos=CB |name=The Diabeastie}}
{{sq start player |no=32 |pos=CB |name=Kazaam}}
{{sq start player |no=32 |pos=CB |name=Kazaam}}
{{sq start player |no=59 |pos=RB |name=Nobuo Uematsu}}
{{sq start player |no=100 |pos=CMF |name=Textdump Pump}}
{{sq start player |no=100 |pos=CMF |name=Textdump Pump}}
{{sq silver player |no=22 |pos=CMF |name=Cyberdwarf}}
{{sq silver player |no=22 |pos=CMF |name=Cyberdwarf}}
{{sq silver player |no=6 |pos=AMF |name=Balthios}}
{{sq silver player |no=6 |pos=AMF |name=Balthios}}
{{sq start player |no=15 |pos=SS |name=Vinceborg 2050}}
{{sq silver player |no=1 |pos=SS |name=Hoopz}}
{{sq silver player |no=1 |pos=SS |name=Hoopz}}
{{sq gold player |no=23 |pos=SS |name=Michael Jordan}}
{{sq gold player |no=23 |pos=SS |name=Michael Jordan}}
Line 61: Line 77:
{{sq mid}}
{{sq mid}}
{{sq player |no=60 |pos=GK |name=Wilford Brimley}}
{{sq player |no=60 |pos=GK |name=Wilford Brimley}}
{{sq player |no=99 |pos=LB |name=Chicken Fry}}
{{sq player |no=99 |pos=CB |name=Chicken Fry}}
{{sq player |no=44 |pos=LB |name={{tt|You Have Aspergers|Dr. Allard}}}}
{{sq player |no=44 |pos=CB |name={{tt|You Have Aspergers|Dr. Allard}}}}
{{sq player |no=17 |pos=CB |name=Enslaved Duergar}}
{{sq player |no=17 |pos=CB |name=Enslaved Duergar}}
{{sq player |no=55 |pos=CB |name={{tt|BOOM SHAKALAKA|Dikembe Mutombo}}}}
{{sq player |no=19 |pos=CB |name=Scott Creelman}}
{{sq player |no=19 |pos=CB |name=Scott Creelman}}
{{sq player |no=74 |pos=RB |name=Cuchulainn}}
{{sq player |no=61 |pos=CMF|name=Ghost Dad}}
{{sq player |no=9 |pos=RB |name=Ghastly Darklord}}
{{sq player |no=9 |pos=CMF |name=Ghastly Darklord}}
{{sq player |no=43 |pos=CMF |name=Shadow Barkley}}
{{sq player |no=15 |pos=CMF |name=Vinceborg 2050}}
{{sq player |no=12 |pos=CMF |name=Ivory Latta}}
{{sq player |no=12 |pos=CMF |name=Ivory Latta}}
{{sq player |no=59 |pos=CMF |name=Nobuo Uematsu}}
{{sq player |no=74 |pos=SS |name=Cuchulainn}}
{{sq player |no=13 |pos=SS |name=Barkley 2 Never Ever}}
{{sq player |no=13 |pos=SS |name=Barkley 2 Never Ever}}
{{sq player |no=43 |pos=SS |name=Shadow Barkley}}
{{sq end}}
{{sq end}}


==Exports==
==Exports==
<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed">'''/ag/ League 8'''
<div class="mw-collapsible-content">
'''Tactics''' - https://mega.nz/file/U7BikQJQ#DPGCAh0mxQmw_k8D_FspfPs2luJJqbnNzELjcBk_of0 '''(PES19)'''<br>
'''Aesthetics''' - https://mega.nz/file/4uJBXRoR#3ucEPqKa8b5zU-n8hUImYATvPfGpUOhny76nCk3MYyQ<br>
'''Audio''' - https://mega.nz/file/xiAQSRCb#cKAm1jlMwPGRM88I50nHheqzbU__Bl-FTvEmv4dsqak
</div>
<div class="mw-collapsible mw-collapsed">'''/ag/ League 7'''
<div class="mw-collapsible-content">
'''Tactics''' - https://mega.nz/file/1vRCzZBK#kKxBfFZJ9iwFPtEGqb89_mW-8JSjZRiDHhnvfrpTOz8 '''(PES19)'''<br>
'''Aesthetics''' - https://mega.nz/file/wuQRkSaS#sEMXbadrAX59VY-RkU2nBRGTEVOxp7lY-e7W5rLyJ4k <br>
'''Audio''' - https://mega.nz/file/xuAWgAwR#vc5AlMGx3xicb2HJvAqf-0mo0NKNwhtyDcXPkxOtqO0
</div>


'''Tactics''' - https://mega.nz/file/FnRAlK5L#Hg79A7J3tNIMvZZQoGLKKJBVtkzuTQsJJdsI-f3uNW0 '''(invitational slot 27)'''<br>
== Match History ==
'''Aesthetics''' - https://mega.nz/file/wuQRkSaS#sEMXbadrAX59VY-RkU2nBRGTEVOxp7lY-e7W5rLyJ4k <br>
{| class="wikitable" width=75%
'''Audio''' - https://mega.nz/file/xuAWgAwR#vc5AlMGx3xicb2HJvAqf-0mo0NKNwhtyDcXPkxOtqO0<br>
|-
!style="background:#E56020;color:#FFFFFF"| Date
!style="background:#1D1160;color:#FFFFFF"| Opponent
!style="background:#E56020;color:#FFFFFF"| Competition
!style="background:#1D1160;color:#FFFFFF"| Result
!style="background:#E56020;color:#FFFFFF"| Scorers
|-bgcolor="ccffcc"
| August 25, 2023
| {{team away|eggs}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League:_The_7_Deadly_Sans|/ag/ League 7]]
| align=center| 2-3 W
|{{goal|8}} Balthios<br>{{goal|22}} Charles Barkley<br>{{goal|86}} Hoopz<br>{{yel|75}} Balthios</small>
|-bgcolor="ccffcc"
| August 27, 2023
| {{team away|balls}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League:_The_7_Deadly_Sans|/ag/ League 7]]
| align=center| 1&ndash;4 W
|{{goal|52||63}} Hoopz<br>{{goal|73}} Enslaved Duergar<br>{{goal|88}} Michael Jordan<br>{{yel|60}} Balthios
|-bgcolor="ffcccc"
| September 3, 2023
| {{team away|slam}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League:_The_7_Deadly_Sans|/ag/ League 7]]
| align=center| 2&ndash;3 L
|{{goal|34||88}} Charles Barkley
|-bgcolor="ffcccc"
| September 7, 2023
| {{Vaughan fhg away}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League:_The_7_Deadly_Sans|/ag/ League 7]]
| align=center| 2&ndash;3 L
|{{goal|52}} Charles Barkley <br>{{goal|79}} Michael Jordan
|-bgcolor="ffcccc"
| August 31, 2024
| {{team away|cats&dogs}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League_8_Crazy_Nights|/ag/ League 8]]
| align=center| 5&ndash;3 L
|{{goal|14||48}} Michael Jordan <br>{{goal|61}} Shadow Barkley
|-bgcolor="ffffcc"
| September 1, 2024
| {{team away|bootleg}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League_8_Crazy_Nights|/ag/ League 8]]
| align=center| 2&ndash;2 D
|{{goal|45+2||84}} Michael Jordan
|-bgcolor="ccffcc"
| September 7, 2024
| {{team away|ytmnd}}
| align=center|[[/ag/_League_8_Crazy_Nights|/ag/ League 8]]
| align=center| 3-2 W
|{{goal|42}} Charles Barkley<br>{{goal|78}} Michael Jordan<br>{{goal|87}} Hoopz
|}

Latest revision as of 19:23, 14 September 2024

/jam/
Slam cum optimis vel jam cum ceteris
Jam logo.png
/jam/ - Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden
Founded January 22, 2008
Manager Chef Boyardee
Owner Tale of Game's Studios
IRL manager Managerless
Team colors
Chat color E56020
B-Ball Orange
Top scorer Michael Jordan (7)
Top assister Charles Barkley (6)
Captain Charles Barkley
Website /jam/ - Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden
Nickname The B-Ballers
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY
3 1 3 7 42.86%
GF GA GD
19 19 0
Biggest win
/balls/ Balls icon.png 1–4 Jam icon.png /jam/
August 27, 2023
Biggest defeat
/cats&dogs/ Cats&dogs icon.png 5–3 Jam icon.png /jam/
August 31, 2024
First match
/eggs/ Eggs icon.png 2–3 Jam icon.png /jam/
August 25, 2023
Team music
Anthem Theme (Space Jam)
Goal horn Johnathan Taylor Thomas
Michael Jordan jesus christ the guy from deep purple sang this
Alternate Goalhorn Zalatar - Precious Pellets
Alternate Goalhorn JTT2
Kits

WARNING: The wiki page you are about to read is canon.

Tales of Game's Studios Presents Chef Boyardee's Barkley, Shut Up and Jam: Gaiden, Chapter 1 of the Hoopz Barkley SaGa is a freeware indie RPG set in post-cyberpocalyptic Neo New York, where basketball has become a capital offense after NBA superstar Charles Barkley performed a verboten Chaos Dunk during a game, inadvertently killing millions.

Decades later, an aging Barkley is implicated in a massive conspiracy that leads him and his allies, including his auspicious son Hoopz, on a journey of redemption, hope, terrorism, 2000s internet humor, neo-shekels, and zaubers.

The game can be downloaded here. There was also a Kickstarter for a sequel that collapsed after 9 years in development (it was not worth the weight). Its scrapped remains are downloadable here.

Roster

No. Position Player
33
  GK
Father Larry Bird
55
  CB
BOOM SHAKALAKA
2
  CB
The Diabeastie
32
  CB
Kazaam
100
  CMF
Textdump Pump
22
  CMF
Cyberdwarf
6
  AMF
Balthios
15
  SS
Vinceborg 2050
1
  SS
Hoopz
23
  SS
Michael Jordan
34
  CF
Charles Barkley Captain
No. Position Player
60
  GK
Wilford Brimley
99
  CB
Chicken Fry
44
  CB
You Have Aspergers
17
  CB
Enslaved Duergar
19
  CB
Scott Creelman
61
  CMF
Ghost Dad
9
  CMF
Ghastly Darklord
12
  CMF
Ivory Latta
59
  CMF
Nobuo Uematsu
74
  SS
Cuchulainn
13
  SS
Barkley 2 Never Ever
43
  SS
Shadow Barkley

Exports

/ag/ League 8

Tactics - https://mega.nz/file/U7BikQJQ#DPGCAh0mxQmw_k8D_FspfPs2luJJqbnNzELjcBk_of0 (PES19)
Aesthetics - https://mega.nz/file/4uJBXRoR#3ucEPqKa8b5zU-n8hUImYATvPfGpUOhny76nCk3MYyQ
Audio - https://mega.nz/file/xiAQSRCb#cKAm1jlMwPGRM88I50nHheqzbU__Bl-FTvEmv4dsqak

/ag/ League 7

Tactics - https://mega.nz/file/1vRCzZBK#kKxBfFZJ9iwFPtEGqb89_mW-8JSjZRiDHhnvfrpTOz8 (PES19)
Aesthetics - https://mega.nz/file/wuQRkSaS#sEMXbadrAX59VY-RkU2nBRGTEVOxp7lY-e7W5rLyJ4k
Audio - https://mega.nz/file/xuAWgAwR#vc5AlMGx3xicb2HJvAqf-0mo0NKNwhtyDcXPkxOtqO0

Match History

Date Opponent Competition Result Scorers
August 25, 2023 Eggs icon.png /eggs/ /ag/ League 7 2-3 W Goal 8' Balthios
Goal 22' Charles Barkley
Goal 86' Hoopz
Booked 75' Balthios
August 27, 2023 Balls icon.png /balls/ /ag/ League 7 1–4 W Goal 52', 63' Hoopz
Goal 73' Enslaved Duergar
Goal 88' Michael Jordan
Booked 60' Balthios
September 3, 2023 Slam icon.png /slam/ /ag/ League 7 2–3 L Goal 34', 88' Charles Barkley
September 7, 2023 Vaughan fhg no border icon.png /fhg/ /ag/ League 7 2–3 L Goal 52' Charles Barkley
Goal 79' Michael Jordan
August 31, 2024 Cats&dogs icon.png /cats&dogs/ /ag/ League 8 5–3 L Goal 14', 48' Michael Jordan
Goal 61' Shadow Barkley
September 1, 2024 Bootleg icon.png /bootleg/ /ag/ League 8 2–2 D Goal 45+2', 84' Michael Jordan
September 7, 2024 Ytmnd icon.png /ytmnd/ /ag/ League 8 3-2 W Goal 42' Charles Barkley
Goal 78' Michael Jordan
Goal 87' Hoopz
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