/his/

/his/
We Didn't Start the Fire
/his/ - History & Humanities
Founded October 31, 2015 Owner Voltaire IRL manager JunoIvanovich !!pRLnAqrt9vP Team colors Chat color FCD405 Holy Roman Yellow Ranking 18 ( 1) Highest rank 15 (August 19, 2017) Lowest rank 56 (April 17, 2016) Top scorer >Holy>Roman>Empire (28) Top assister Bismarck (8) Captain Charles II Website /his/ - History & Humanities Nickname /his/torians
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY 10 2 11 23 43.48%
GF GA GD 45 44 +1
Biggest win /his/  4–1  /v/ April 15, 2016 Biggest defeat /his/  1–5  /vp/ May 5, 2018 First match /his/  4–1  /v/ April 15, 2016
Elite Cup Appearances 2 (First in Summer 2017) Best result 11th, Summer 2017 Babby Cup Appearances 3 (First in Spring 2016) Best result 13th, Spring 2017
Team music
Anthem Anthem of the Austro-Hungarian Empire Victory Anthem Piotr Ilich Tchaikovsky - 1812 Overture (Finale) Goal horn Unter dem Doppeladler Marsch Mongolian Horse Archer Goalhorn Khuleg Baatar >Holy>Roman>Empire Goalhorn Schei-wi-dei-wi-du Bismarck Goalhorn Preußens Gloria Charles II Goalhorn El Mundo - Chaccaron Maccaron
Kits
Home kit Away kit

The great Emperor Hiroyuki Nishimura answered the calls of the repressed /his/ communities of 4chan and granted them a homeland. This homeland was called /his/; and it was estimated to have been created in 2015AD (but possibly sometime after that because we couldn't be fucked sourcing). The anons of this board have come together to form a team that represents them in the 4chan Cup, in all their historical, humanitarian and philosophical capacity.

After a humiliating defeat in Winterby overwhelming forces of /u/ and /mlp/ the /his/ forces are in full retreat. Now they are preparing for Spring.
By the way, we have a discord server now. Join here!

Exports

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup

• Tactical Export:Tactics
• Aesthetics Export:Aesthetics
• Music Export:Music

Roster

Main Article: /his/ roster

No. Position Player 10   GK Maginot Line 7   LB Diogenes 19   CB Finno-Korean Hyper war 17   CB Charlemagne 18   RB Napoleon 31   DMF Vlad the Implier 4   CMF Monsieur Lindy 43   AMF Bomber Harris 71   SS Bismarck 15   SS Charles II 45   CF >Holy>Roman>Empire

No. Position Player 12   GK Great Wall of China 6   LB Maoist worst nightmare 11   LB Pregnant Anne Frank 16   RB EVERY MAN A KING 14   RB >&Humanities 20   CB The Russian Baltic Fleet 21   CB African paratrooper 1   CB Angry Old Man 99   CMF Mongolian Horse Archer 95   CMF More Wives, Your Grace? 13   CMF Julius Caesar 23   CMF Radical Centrist

From left to right, back row: Maginot Line, >Holy>Roman>Empire, Bomber Harris, Napoleon, Finno-Korean Hyper war, Charles II.
From left to right, front row: Vlad the Implier, Charlemagne, Diogenes, Monsieur Lindy, Bismarck.

Special music

Anthem for /u/: Franz Joseph Haydn, String Quartet No. 62 in C major, Op. 76, No. 3, Hob.III:77, "Emperor"

History

Previous campaigns

2018 Winter Campaign

Step Aside Peasants; his Royal Highness takes to the Field
Strategically, there was little more that could have been done - that was the assertion of the coaching staff come the close of the Summer fighting season. His most Royal Highness Charles II, the King of Spain, Naples, Sardinia, Sicily and Burgundy, disagreed. With vigour and energy his majesty revamped the team to include himself, donned his football boots and strode out into the narrow and blustery winter cup like a colossus.

/his/ v /fit/

The team, all of them petty men, walked beneath his huge legs and basked in the shade of his majestic chin as they began their slow march towards a premiership. /fit/, having been challenged by the presence of the ultimate alpha male, were the first combatants /his/ were to face. The contest was noted in the opening minutes for a lack of control from both /his/ and /fit/, but /his/ would not bow to the aggressive style that /fit/ adopted.

...It's true, they're not really being intimidated by the muscles of /fit/. /fit/ wojak back there... whoever that is - ah, it's 'feelin' fit, buddy' - is basically ripping out of his clothes he's so ripped, but /his/ will not be intimidated.

--Marqod

Contrary to this, in fact, /his/ dominated the half in both possession and territory (63% possession with 4 shots on goal), though they were unable to capitalize immediately due to a tightly-packed defence. >Holy>Roman>Empire continued to apply pressure, starting in the 25th minute with a pass to an on-side Charles II, but despite a mighty chin swing from his majesty READ THE FUCKING STICKY made a solid save to keep the scores nil-all. Barely a minute later, a penalty conceded by Gains Goblin allowed Bismarck an attempt, but again the /fit/ goalkeeper was competent, and in such a way the game continued at an impasse until the 35th minute - where a daring chip into territory by Bismarck met an aerial strike by Charles II, which hit the post and then the back of the goalkeeper's head to award /his/ their first goal of the season (albiet not one they scored). /fit/'s strategy shift into counterattack was immediate, and a header by /fit/ striker Zyzz into the top-left pocket was saved comfortably by the new /his/ Goalkeeper, Maginot Line, to end the half 1-0.

The second half began with reasonable /fit/ offensive maneuvers, but a sudden breakthrough by >Holy>Roman>Empire to beat three offenders kept them honest, forcing the goalie into an alarming dive to save a blooter. The resulting corner gave a rare opportunity to Lutheran Shitposter, who struck well, but yet-a-fucking-gain /fit/'s goalie bore the brunt of the attack with a good save.

I saw the book moving at about the right speed - that was a power header for a non-medal [player]!

--Marqod, referring to Lutheran Shitposter's playermodel (a bible)

/fit/ scrambled to assemble a proper countermeasure, finally taking it to the /his/ defensive line in the 68th minute - a potential shot on goal by Squatz was pounced on by the Maginot Line. Occasional moments of glory emerged to keep /fit/ aggression at bay, with Gauled utterly deleting two defenders in the 75th minute to keep the ball aggressively postured. Moments later, Bomber Harris sensed the presence of the eternal g*rman and dropped a bomb that cannoned into the back of Bismarck's head, who was then also fouled for being offside. The turnabout took the ball back into /his/'s defensive half, and gave opportunity afresh to /fit/, but ultimate several brilliant and not-at-all-reflected-in-real-life defences by the Maginot Line rendered the attack inert, and the /his/torians emerged 1-0 and victorious in their first match for the season.

/his/ v /u/; Featuring 'That Goal'

"...[A] magnificent joint anthem. We're into this comfy match."

--Doyes, after the dual /his/-/u/ Anthem

It was a dignified affair at the /u/ home stadium of St. Michael's, but those on the /his/ side who were old enough to remember the previous year remembered the indignities suffered at the hands of /u/, who would go on to place second in the Summer Cup of 2017. So too were the battle lines drawn for a chance to score a revenge and pillage a few lesbians.

An honest and decent contention was made in the attack and defence of both teams; who both ran 3/5/2 to open the play - but the outcome of this was that the Macaron (/u/'s ball) remained squarely in the /his/ defensive half. A foul at the 13th minute committed by the Russian Baltic Fleet gave /u/ a threatening chance to score, but the Maginot line saved competantly. The order of attack down the /his/ line was, in much the same way as th fleet itself, also similarly mired in communication issues - /his/ could not manage to crack the /u/ seige. Matters were complicated further when Bomber Harris reaped the proverbial whirlwind a bit too hard - he recieved a yellow card for a personal foul on Friending. He left the field amid howls of frustration from the /his/ 4CC discord and fans. Moments later, the Maginot Line was subject to attack from Feito-chan, which it rebuked - but barely a few seconds had passed before Feito-chan scored a goal from a very thin angle to the Line's right-hand side.

The response to aggress was instant; with Gen. Ivanovich observing that there was too much danger to allowing /u/ unmitigated access to their half. /his/ had not offered a single strike on goal.

"Their [/his/'s] offence can't get it very far, like - they get to the midfield, and then they get the ball stolen almost immediately."

--Doyes

From here until the end of the first half ran a more contested state of play, albiet not one without substantial note from the commentary box that /u/ were contesting it all too well. >Holy>Roman>Empire attempted to put /his/ on the board with a shot in the 45th - but it was lackluster, and largely muffled by /u/ defender Black Sunshine to the point where PES did not even consider it a shot on goal. The stats told the story: /u/ had managed 4 shots, all on target at that juncture, versus /his/'s zero - all the while maintaining a two-point deficit on possession (/u/ 48%-52% /his/).

At the start of the second half, a sneak attack yielded an opportunity for Bismarck, but he was cleared confidently by /u/ defenders. The resulting momentum was sharply reverted as the ball was cleared to Purest Form of Love at the halfway mark, who utterly annihilated three /his/ defenders, making a last-second cross to Akkarin. The /u/ striker took another incredibly sharp-angled goal past the Maginot line to take the score to 2-0.

"I mean, I do question /his/ putting what is essentially a meme in the goal - *stifles laughter* - it's like, 'hey, what'd be a good player to represent our goalkeeper? The maginot line! Brilliant."

--Paval, not quite getting the joke

A preset change later to a defensive-oriented aspect left many scratching their heads. Gen. Ivanovich later admitted it was designed to lure /u/ into a false sense of security, an act that was swiftly justified. A long ball from near /his/' goal box from Diogenes found its way to >Holy>Roman>Empire, who promptly dazzled an attacker and crossed into Charles II in the centre - and oh lord, his most gracious majesty would not disappoint. In a summary of what this team really fucking means, he leapt into the air above and ahead of no less than four /u/ defenders and delivered an explosive bicycle kick from well beyond the box; rocketing the coveted Macaron into the back of the net at a blinding pace that not even the well-experienced /u/ goalkeeper Madokami could match. It was /his/' first goal scored for the cup.

He does not need wings to fly.

...Incredible. I am completely at a loss for words.

--Doyes

Spectacular... what an absolutely ludicrious cross.

--Paval

If you thought /his/ was buried, you're dead wrong.

--MBa

Suffice it to say that after that point, the commentary box was substantially less critical of the /his/ attack.

Subs were introduced at 65:00, with African Paratrooper and Caesar taking the field to replace Napoleon and Anne Frank respectively. Elsewhere, energy and fitness ran high, and /his/ was considerably more aggressive and dangerous as they moved into the last quarter.

A threatening corner from /u/, to briefly switch the flow, led to a series of repelled attacks; only one of which reached the Maginot line and was deflected. Tension and nerves ran high on the /u/ side of things, and Feito-chan was booked for a foul on Caesar in the 75th - an offence that would remove her from play from the next game (it being her second in two games). The opportunity was there. But no amount of /his/ attack could finish the job, and under immense pressure, /u/ refused to break despite a blooter from Charles that scraped the left goalpost. In the end, a strategic retreat was ordered. /his/ had taken their best and given a few moments of magic, and possession remained competitive at 50% each, but /u/ proved far more competent, and the match ended in their favour 2-1. /u/ would later go on to forge a hard-earned finals victory to claim their first star; and in this way it is worth pointing out that the relatively new /his/ could keep their head held high, even in loss that threatened to relegate them.

Match Log

Recent & Upcoming Official Matches

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers	Video
May 5, 2018	/vp/	2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup - Group G	1-5 L	>Holy>Roman>Empire  32'
May 11, 2018	/trv/	2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup - Group G	TBD
May 13, 2018	/lit/	2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup - Group G	TBD
May 20, 2018	/b/	2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup - Group G	TBD

Previous Official Matches

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers	Video
April 15, 2016	/v/	2016 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group B	4-1 W	>Holy>Roman>Empire  45+1', 56', 73' Bismarck  64'
April 16, 2016	/co/	2016 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group B	4-1 W	>Holy>Roman>Empire  17', 66' Bismarck  33' Vlad the Implier  36'
April 17, 2016	/toy/	2016 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group B	1-3 L	>Holy>Roman>Empire  64'
May 6, 2016	/lit/	2016 Spring Babby Cup - Group C	5-6 L	>Holy>Roman>Empire  44', 45', 49', 54', 73'
May 8, 2016	/o/	2016 Spring Babby Cup - Group C	0-1 L
May 14, 2016	/cm/	2016 Spring Babby Cup - Group C	3-2 W	Bismarck  30' >Holy>Roman>Empire  43', 66'
October 29, 2016	/p/	2016 Autumn Babby Cup - Group H	4-5 L	>Holy>Roman>Empire  8', 31' Napoleon  73' Bismarck  90+4'
November 4, 2016	/int/	2016 Autumn Babby Cup - Group H	1-1 D	>Holy>Roman>Empire  68'
November 6, 2016	/wg/	2016 Autumn Babby Cup - Group H	0-3 L
April 28, 2017	/lgbt/	2017 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group A	3-2 W	Bismarck  21', 30' >Holy >Roman >Empire  68'
April 29, 2017	/wsg/	2017 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group A	3-0 W	13', 76' >Holy >Roman >Empire  89' Napoleon
April 30, 2017	/tg/	2017 Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers - Group A	1-1 D	>Holy >Roman >Empire  89'
May 12, 2017	/mlp/	2017 Spring Babby Cup - Group B	2-1 W	12', 71' >Holy>Roman>Empire	Video
May 14, 2017	/sci/	2017 Spring Babby Cup - Group B	4-3 W	Vlad The Implier  5' >Holy>Roman>Empire  45+0' Bismarck  74', 90+5'	Video
May 20, 2017	/n/	2017 Spring Babby Cup - Group B	2-3 L	87' Bomber Harris  90+6' Anarcho-Memeism	Video
May 27, 2017	/tg/	2017 Spring Babby Cup - Knockouts	0-2 L		Video
July 28, 2017	/s4s/	2017 4chan Summer Cup - Group C	3-2 W	7', 29' Bismarck  22' >Holy>Roman>Empire	Video
July 30, 2017	/wg/	2017 4chan Summer Cup - Group C	1-2 L	69' >Holy>Roman>Empire	Video
August 5, 2017	/asp/	2017 4chan Summer Cup - Group C	2-0 W	42' Bomber Harris  52' >Holy>Roman>Empire	Video
August 12, 2017	/u/	2017 4chan Summer Cup - Knockouts	2-3 L	8' >Holy>Roman>Empire  90+2' Bomber Harris	Video
17 February, 2018	/fit/	2018 4chan Winter Cup - Group G	1-0 W	Read the Fucking Sticky  36'	Video
23 February, 2018	/u/	2018 4chan Winter Cup - Group G	1-2 L	Charles II  59'	Video
25 February, 2018	/mlp/	2018 4chan Winter Cup - Group G	0-2 L		Video

Unofficial Matches

Date	Opponent	Competition	Result	Scorers
January 30, 2016	/trash/	2016 Winter Cup Unfriendlies	2-3 L	Rasputin's Dick  21' Bismarck  43'
January 7, 2017	/vg/	2017 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies	1-3 L	Bismarck  30'
May 6, 2017	/block/	Invite challenge	4-5 L
January 19, 2018	/pol/	2018 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies	1-3 L	88' Bismarck
January 20, 2018	/vg/	2018 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies	2-5 L	Charles II  54', 63'

Team Statistics

Italics denote retired players

Goalscorers

Who /his/ here?

Player	Goals	Assists
>Holy>Roman>Empire	28	4
Bismarck	11	8
Napoleon	4	7
Vlad the Implier	2	3
Mongolian Horse Archer	0	2
Bomber Harris	3	3
Lutheran Shitposter	0	1
Charlemagne	0	1
Charles II	1	0
Shitposting Cossack	1	0
Anarco-Memeism	1	0
Empire for Sale	0	1
>Marxism	0	1
Eternal Anglo	0	1
Carl von Clausewitz	0	1

Goalkeepers

Player	Starts	Saves	Clean Sheets
Maginot Line	3	12	1
Great Wall of China	7	14	0
Julius Caesar	3	5	0
Christian Dark Ages	10	23	3

Records

Holder	Date	Record	Match
/his/ (Tied)	May 6, 2016	Most goals scored in a single match for the losing team with 5.	/his/  5 - 6  /lit/
>Holy>Roman>Empire	May 6, 2016	Fastest brace, scoring in 44' and 45' (1 minute).	/his/  5 - 6  /lit/
>Holy>Roman>Empire	May 6, 2016	Fastest hattrick, scoring in 44', 45', and 49' (5 minutes).	/his/  5 - 6  /lit/
>Holy>Roman>Empire	May 6, 2016	Fastest double brace, scoring in 44', 45', 49', and 54' (10 minutes).	/his/  5 - 6  /lit/
/his/	July 28, 2017	Most free kicks awarded to a single team with 10.	/s4s/  2 - 3  /his/

Rivalries

The Spooker Bowl Both boards like dusty old books, but whose are better? In a /his/toric first Babby match, the goals poured in for /lit/ until >HRE fought back to turn what would have been a humiliating defeat into a narrow 5-6 loss.

0-0-1

The Edgelord Derby Most people got tired of /pol/'s right-wing shitposting. Based Hiro heard our call and created /his/, where in a (mostly) civil matter, anons discuss history and the humanities. The edgelords of /pol/ are now contained in their conspiratard safe space, free to jerk off to Donald Trump and other wingnuts. What cucks. Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

0-0-0

Team photos

• 

  Summer 2017 squad

Gallery

"Alright, consider me convinced. /his/ is actually a good team."

— DrBorisG, 2016 Spring Qualifiers

• 

  L'capitan dribbling up the pitch

• 

  Born to feel

• 

  >Propoganda following the /his/ vs. /lit/ match

• 

  Julius Caesar contemplating his life choices.

• 

  Anarco-Memeism scores during the /n/ match.

• 

  Napoleon gets bumped by a lesbian sweet