/hr/ Roster

Golds, Silvers, and Other Starters have the appropriate colored background.

Goalkeepers

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
CELEB THREADS		Hypervenom Phantom	Easily the majority of threads on /hr/, celebrity threads block out almost any other content that you might want to see in high resolution. Hopefully this means he can also block balls from getting into the net.	190 / 84 / R / #99
LANDSCAPE		Hypervenom Phantom	He makes for an impressive vista, and hopefully that width and height will keep balls out of the net.	182 / 85 / R / #14
MEGAPIXEL		Hypervenom Phantom	-	185 / 77 / R / #15

Center Back

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
ASTRONOMY		Morelia Neo	Possibly the only thing posted with regularity outside of celebrity threads and automobiles. his orbital tallness will help keep the center clear of flying balls.	205 / 75 / R / #11
USER WAS WARNED		Morelia Neo	Though his twin User Was Banned no longer plays for /hr/, he's refused to pick up the slack and is still content to just tell you how you screwed up handling the ball so you can avoid doing it next time.	185 / 85 / R / #2
MILA KUNIS		Morelia Neo	She's been in a bunch of things you watched, but you just never noticed until you saw huge hot pictures of her. She seems to be hitting her stride lately, on and off the pitch, if you discount how much she works with Seth MacFarlane	181 / 50 / R / #6	P11
CELEB FAKES		Morelia Neo	You are not a master photoshopper and this is a high resolution board. We can tell.	185 / 78 / R / #5

Left Backs

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
Bully My Dick		Morelia Neo	K-pop group T-ara got caught in a Three's Company style bullying scandal. You don't care though, you just wanna oggle that tall girl with the nice long legs.	181 / 50 / R / #6	P11
XTREME VAGINA CLOSEUPS		Morelia Neo	It was pretty much a given somebody would want to post this sooner or later. No, he's not getting an in game face.	185 / 78 / L / #98

Right Backs

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
MOVIE POSTERS		Morelia Neo	Utilizes the power of orange blue contrast to stun his opponents into turning over the ball.	176 / 75 / R / #25	S05
SUMMER GLAU		Morelia Neo	Some anon is very convinced she needs a daily thread on /hr/, but geek icon status does not make you a stater.	181 / 74 / R / #9	P11

Defending Midfielders

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
NUGU		Morelia Neo	She's been in a bunch of things you watched, but you just never noticed until you saw huge hot pictures of her. She seems to be hitting her stride lately, on and off the pitch, if you discount how much she works with Seth MacFarlane	181 / 50 / R / #6	P11
EMMA STONE		Morelia Neo	Like Mila, you've seen her in a lot of things, and her on field performance is invigorating. If only she'd pick which hair color to stick with. On the pitch she goes with a classic dark red.	181 / 52 / R / #22	P11
>1000x1000		Morelia Neo	The minimum size of images postable to /hr/. His contract forces him to move to /p/ if he gets any smaller.	175 / 77 / L / #7	S04
WIKIFEET		Morelia Neo	How is this not enough feet for you?	172 / 78 / L / #4	P11
CURRENCY		Morelia Neo	Do you need more money in resolution so large you can see all the specks of dirt and micro-scratches? Sure, we all do!	180 / 72 / R / #97

Attacking Midfielders

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
LORD TAENGOO		evoSPEED 1.2	K-pop star Taeyeon, SNSD stater by request of the fans.	193 / 72 / R / #24	P01, S01, S06
HAUNTED AREUM		evoSPEED 1.2	Former member of T-ara. Please stop spreading rumors that she is possessed by spirits.	189 / 66 / R / #12	P01, S01, S06
3 GALLONS PER TIT		Morelia Neo	Anon asked how much milk K-pop star Yura had per tit. He received a pretty definitive answer.	181 / 77 / L / #18

Second Strikers

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
EMMA WATSON		evoSPEED 1.2	A long time 4chan fixation, Emma is no stranger to the gawking of fans. Able to operate under that kind of pressure, she keeps playing solid but quiet gold midfielding.	169 / 41 / L / #8	P03, P05, S05, S07
PICTURES OF HITLER		Morelia Neo	Look we get that you said World War 2 thread, and those are some very impressive period jeeps you lead off with, but we know you're just fishing for somebody to post high resolution pictures of Hitler.	175 / 75 / R / #20

Center Forwards

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
TAYLOR SWIFT		evoSPEED 1.2	Singer, songwriter, gold second striker. She's all but officially /hr/'s goddess. Pray for goals and to avoid having a song written about how much the rest of the team sucks.	195 / 61 / R / #13	P12, S01, S02, S06
>SHE WILL NEVER KNOW		Morelia Neo	Your celeb waifu? She will never know you exist. Probably because you're just a sub for a gold player.	170 / 65 / R / #23

Former Team Members

Name	Description
not /r/	Quietly let go from the team after a scandal proved he was also playing for /s/ on the side.
Yuri's Thighs	Fired for being perfect, 10/10. But seriously, the kpop references needed to be a little less generic than this.
Victoria Justice	Fired to make room for Bully My Dick, and by fired we mean bullied out of the way.
>700x700	Swallowed whole by his bigger brother.
Wildscreen	Seriously, wtf is was a wildscreen?
User Was Banned	Player was... you know.
Max Image Limit	Died a slow death after reaching page 10.