/s4s/
[s4s] (stylized /s4s/ for cup play) is a virtual professional football team representing the Shit 4chan Says board on 4chan. [s4s] was, as a board, originally thought to be an April Fools' joke. However, it was made a permanent fixture on the site by Moot, and is now home to some of the D A N K E S T M E M E S and best GETs on all of 4chan. The team itself has also challenged these labels, both on and off the divegrass pitch.
The team's history is long and winding, with [s4s] having played in every level of the Cup, ranging from the first ever Babby Cup Qualifiers to the Elite level of play. [s4s] just won their first ever cupe in the 2021 4chan World Cup LOLE!!!
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1)
Roster
See also:
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Team Photos
The first [s4s] team photo, for the 2014 4chan Summer Cup.
The [s4s] team photo for the 2015 4chan Winter Cup.
The [s4s] team photo for the 2017 4chan Winter Cup.
The [s4s] team photo for the 2019 4chan Summer Cup.
Team History
For earlier history: /s4s/ history
2021 Summer World Cup
[s4s] went into 2021 with new management, and feeling very fresh. Unfortunately, their first match against /cgl/ made their outlook for the future look very grim. After forgetting their tactical export for the first match, they lost a very boring 0-1 to the autopilot seagulls /cgl/; not very nice. Their next match however was against the favorites to win the goup to many, the giant robots of /m/. A change of tactics was made to run a 3-4-3 after a very bad 4-3-3 did not work, and in the last 10 minutes of the match, Bateman tied it up to end in a draw 2-2 against the robots. This was a much better look for them, but they still had to go against the perverts of /h/ for a chance to make it out of groups. Sticking to the formation change, Bateman and Keksandra ran over the defense of /h/, winning 4-1, a blessing putting them in a very good position to advance. The following match of the group was a close tie 2-2 between /m/ and /cgl/, putting [s4s] ahead on Goal Differential of the seagulls and promoting them to the Round of 32.
In the Round of 32, the dubs loving squad had to face their first match against a newcomer to the cup, /vst/. This match saw [s4s] scoring early with a nice goal from Keksandra, but /vst/ used their tactical genius to quickly retaliate with 2 goals in a row from Nuclear Ghandi shortly after, followed by one more from KANE LIVES (lole) before the end of the first half. The second half was looking slightly better, as Keksandra scored again at the 53 minute mark with only 1 goal to go in 37 minutes remaining. The game came down to a grinding halt, with missed chances from both sides, until finally at the very end of the game Nice Grill equalized with a VERY nice goal at 90+2 to set the game into Extra Time. The extra time saw both teams flounder about, until it was time for benuldies. Both teams put on one of the funniest shows of benuldies to come, with both golds and one silver on each side missing their PK's. The game was decided on the 2nd SDPK for [s4s] with ASS taking it home for the s4squatches.
[s4s] had won the chance to face /mlp/, their friends, in a Quarter-Finals match in which they were the clear underdog. /mlp/ quickly set the pace of the game with a 5 minute goal from >rape, but Bateman brought it right back shortly after to make it 1-1, and then again almost 20 minutes later to make it 2-1. With 10 minutes left before the half, >rape sunk in two more with some 45+1 magic on a very nice header over #fortune. Fortune was on [s4s] side though, as the defense was immaculate from them for this entire match. Bateman brought the game even with a late 83' goal which took the game into extra time, in which Nice Grill again came to the rescue sinking a goal at 101'. The team shifted to a more defensive mind set after this and focused on not letting /mlp/ score for the rest of the game, and they were successful, upsetting one of the giants many thought would win the whole cup.
Again [s4s] were seen as the underdogs heading into the semi-finals, they had to face the spartans of /sp/ in a Semi-Finals match for a chance at the Cup. This match took a much different turn, as Snek Court, a non medal was the first to score for [s4s] on a nice curler to the corner of the net. A bit of spaghetti ensued, as Bateman and Costanza were both seen as off-sides on some excellent goals which ended up not counting. Bateman would score off some spaghetti header off of the Janny of /sp/, and again 9 minutes later to make it a 3-1 game for [s4s]. Le Cut Inside Man would give the /sp/artans a chance, making the game 3-2 as he got a nice shot in for a 2nd non-medal player scoring in this game. [s4s] again swapped to their defensive mindset, choking out the offense of /sp/ (nicely), which resulted in frustration from the /sp/ side, enough to give Keksandra the room to put an exclamation mark on the game ending it 4-2 with a 90+4 goal and ending the run of yet another giant and favorite to win it all.
[s4s] had made it to the finals, this time to face their "older brother" so to say in the name of /b/. Topkek quickly came to life in this game, making his appearance felt for the first time all cup with a quick curler into the net at the 6 minute mark. Bateman would get a long through ball which he ran a good portion of the pitch himself, but at the very end, made a selfless pass to Nice Grill who had more space for her to sink it, they were up 2-0 in the finals of the 2021 4chan World Cup. The game continued onwards with more amazing defensive plays and saves from the likes of #fortune, godly luck was indeed on the side of [s4s]. Longcat would score in the 74th minute of the game off a header from a corner, to #fortunes surprise, but yet again [s4s] had decided it was time to go into full defense mode. /b/ tried and tried as they continued with their aggression, but it was thwarted and again with an exclamation mark, Bateman scored off of a header from a corner to end the game for sure at 90+2, with the final score being 3-1. [s4s] had won their first cup, fortune and dubs were on their side on this amazing run with #fortune winning the golden glove for most saves at 22(check'em), and multiple star players making goals on repeating digits. They were rewarded with a star to their name and a sticky on their board, probably from the likes of based Swaglord; only he knows what's in store for the future of these kek lovers.
Match History
| Match Date | Opponent | Competition | Result | Goal Scorers | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| July 12, 2013 | 3-1 L |
Shrek | |||
| July 20, 2013 | 1-0 W |
Quads | |||
| September 21, 2013 | 2-0 L | ||||
| October 5, 2013 | 1-0 W |
Shrek | |||
| October 25, 2013 | 4-2 W |
Shrek | |||
| October 26, 2013 | 3-0 W |
Patrick Bateman | |||
| October 27, 2013 | 2-1 W |
Shrek | |||
| October 27, 2013 | 1-1 D |
Shrek | |||
| November 16, 2013 | 2-1 L |
Shrek | |||
| November 22, 2013 | 1-1 D |
Shrek | |||
| November 24, 2013 | 4-4 D |
Shrek | |||
| January 11, 2014 | 1-0 L | ||||
| January 19, 2014 | 1-1 D |
Shrek | |||
| April 6, 2014 | 2-1 L |
[s4s]-Tan | |||
| April 11, 2014 | 3-3 D |
Patrick Bateman | |||
| April 13, 2014 | 1-0 W | Patrick Bateman  42'
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| April 19, 2014 | 2-1 W | Patrick Bateman 13', 70'
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| April 26, 2014 | 5-0 L | ||||
| May 31, 2014 | 2-1 L | Patrick Bateman 33'
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| June 7, 2014 | 2-1 W | [s4s]-Tan 34', 39'
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| July 19, 2014 | 4-2 W | Cory Baxter 16', 37' Patrick Bateman 33'[s4s]-Tan 82'
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| July 26, 2014 | 2-2 D |
Cory Baxter | |||
| July 27, 2014 | 2-1 L |
Topkek | |||
| July 27, 2014 | 1(6)-1(5) L |
[s4s]-Tan | |||
| February 14, 2015 | 3-0 W |
Topkek | |||
| February 20, 2015 | 5-0 W |
Dubs | |||
| February 22, 2015 | 1-1 D |
[s4s]-Tan | |||
| February 28, 2015 | 3-0 W |
D A N K M E M E S | |||
| March 1, 2015 | 3-2 L |
Patrick Bateman | |||
| July 31, 2015 | 1-1 D | Patrick Bateman 65'
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| August 2, 2015 | 4-1 W | [s4s]-Tan 4', 74', 83' Patrick Bateman 34'
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| August 8, 2015 | 4-3 L | Patrick Bateman 13', 44', 70'
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| October 24, 2015 | 1-0 W | Patrick Bateman 34'
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| October 30, 2015 | 3-1 L | Patrick Bateman 71'
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| November 1, 2015 | 4-3 W | Patrick Bateman 4', 90+' [s4s]-Tan 30'Ebin 42'
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| November 8, 2015 | 2-1 W | [s4s]-Tan 18' Patrick Bateman 87'
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| November 14, 2015 | 4-3 W (a.e.t.) | Patrick Bateman 31', 78' Topkek 40'Snek Court 111'
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| November 15, 2015 | 2-0 L | ||||
| February 20, 2016 | 4-0 W | Patrick Bateman 7', 73', 85' [s4s]-Tan 29'
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| February 26, 2015 | 1-1 D | Patrick Bateman 25'
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| February 28, 2016 | 4-0 L | ||||
| March 5, 2016 | 2(4)-2(3) W | Nice Grill 41' Patrick Bateman 59'
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| March 6, 2016 | 3-2 L | Topkek 14' Patrick Bateman 45+3'
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| August 6, 2016 | 2-2 D | Topkek 38' Patrick Bateman 61'
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| August 12, 2016 | 2-1 W | Topkek 35' Patrick Bateman 42'
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| August 14, 2016 | 2-1 W | Patrick Bateman 30' Nice Grill 53'
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| August 20, 2016 | 3-0 L | ||||
| February 11, 2017 | 3-1 W | Topkek 21' Patrick Bateman 53', 80'
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| February 17, 2017 | 1-0 L | ||||
| February 19, 2017 | 2-1 W | Topkek 38', 43'
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| February 25, 2017 | 5-2 L | Patrick Bateman 45+0', 58'
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| July 28, 2017 | 3-2 L | Patrick Bateman 18' Keksandra 90+2'
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| July 30, 2017 | 3-3 D | Patrick Bateman 48', 90+0' Keksandra 7'
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| August 5, 2017 | 1-2 L | Keksandra 90+2'
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| October 27, 2017 | 1-3 L | Patrick Bateman 45+0'
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| October 29, 2017 | 1-2 W | Patrick Bateman 21', 90+0'
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| October 29, 2017 | 2-1 W | TOPKEK 15', 59'
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| May 4,2018 | 2-0 W | Patrick Bateman 23' Slut Sanae  30'
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| May 6,2018 | 1-2 L | Patrick Bateman 19'
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| May 11,2018 | 2-3 L | Patrick Bateman 41' Keksandra 87'
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| May 14, 2018 | 3-1 W | Patrick Bateman 8', 53' Keksandra 90+2'
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| October 26, 2018 | 2-0 W | Topkek 51' Patrick Bateman 69' (pen.)
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| October 28, 2018 | 3-1 W | Nice Grill 13' Topkek 33' Patrick Bateman 52'
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| November 3, 2018 | 5-1 W | Nice Grill 10' Keksandra 45+4', 90+7' Topkek 49' Flowre 85'
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| November 10, 2018 | 1(4)-1(3) L | Patrick Bateman 59'
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| February 16, 2018 | 5-2 W | Topkek 11', 28' Patrick Bateman 52', 87' Keksandra 66'
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| February 22, 2019 | 5-2 L | Keksandra 18' Patrick Bateman 81'
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| February 24, 2019 | 7-3 W | Topkek 6', 37' Patrick Bateman 58' Keksandra 50', 62', 61', 77'
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| March 2, 2019 | 5-4 W (a.e.t.) | Patrick Bateman 22', 41', 51' Topkek 105+2', 117'
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| March 3, 2019 | 3-1 W | Patrick Bateman 47' Keksandra 68' Topkek 88'
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| March 3, 2019 | 1-2 L (a.e.t.) | Topkek 38'
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| March 3, 2019 | 4-3 W | Keksandra 13', 18' Patrick Bateman 83' Nice Grill 90+1'
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| July 20, 2019 | 0-1 L | ||||
| July 26, 2019 | 0-4 L | ||||
| July 28, 2019 | 1-1 D | Patrick Bateman 22'
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| October 25, 2019 | 1-5 L | Keksandra 43'
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| October 27, 2019 | 0-1 L | ||||
| November 2, 2019 | 3-3 D | Keksandra 51', 90+3' Patrick Bateman 67'
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| April 11, 2020 | 3-1 W | Nice Grill 38' Patrick Bateman 73', 83'
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| April 11, 2020 | 1-1 D | Patrick Bateman 18'
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| April 12, 2020 | 2-2 D | ses 17' Patrick Bateman 66'
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| April 24, 2020 | 1-0 W | Patrick Bateman 6'
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| April 26, 2020 | 3-1 W | Patrick Bateman 18' Patrick Bateman 29' Keksandra 48'
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| May 2, 2020 | 7-3 W | Patrick Bateman 14', 61' Keksandra 64', 68', 74' Nice Grill 45+3' Flowre 85'
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| May 9, 2020 | 4-1 W | ses 18' Flowre 52' Keksandra 66' Patrick Bateman 72'
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| May 10, 2020 | 2-0 L | ||||
| July 17, 2020 | 4-3 L | Keksandra 18, 71, 90+3'
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| July 19, 2020 | 1-1 D | Patrick Bateman 37'
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| July 25, 2020 | 2-1 L | Keksandra 75'
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| October 23 2020 | 3-2 L | Keksandra 20' Topkek 48'
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| October 25, 2020 | 3-2 L | Keksandra 8,48'
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| October 31 2020 | 2-1 L | Keksandra 33'
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Tournament History
| Competition | Win | Draw | Loss | End result | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| All friendlies | 4 | 1 | 6 | >friendliest team >lose most of your friendlies | |
 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers |
3 | 1 | 0 | 1st - Qualified | >""""winning"""" a fetus |
 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
0 | 2 | 1 | 25th - Relegated | >almost losing to autopilot /cgl/ >letting it slip against /r9k/ |
 2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup |
2 | 1 | 2 | 16th - Promoted | >getting blown the fuck out by OaB /ic/ |
 2014 4chan Summer Cup |
1 | 1 | 2 | 10th - Held Promotion | First Elite Cup; The Cup of Cory |
 2015 4chan Winter Cup |
3 | 1 | 1 | 5th - Held Promotion | Almost made it to the semifinals. Fucking /tg/. |
 2015 4chan Summer Cup |
1 | 1 | 1 | 17th - Relegated | 
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 2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
4 | 0 | 2 | 5th - Promoted | >SACKING THE MANAGER FOR FINISHING 5TH |
 2016 4chan Winter Cup |
2 | 1 | 2 | 7th - Held Promotion | >lost 3-2 in the quarterfinals again |
 2016 4chan Summer Cup |
2 | 1 | 1 | 15th - Held Promotion | Killed in the Ro16 by /adv/. |
 2017 4chan Winter Cup |
2 | 0 | 2 | 15th - Held Promotion | THAT. FUCKING. KAT. |
 2017 4chan Summer Cup |
0 | 1 | 2 | 28th - Relegated | The Dark Era begins. |
 2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
2 | 0 | 1 | 17th - Failed to Promote | The first of two 6-Point Hells. |
 2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup |
2 | 0 | 1 | 19th - Failed to Promote | YOU GOT BEAT BY /t/. The second of the aforementioned Hells. |
 2018 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
3 | 0 | 1 | 11th - Promoted | Freed from Hell, Lost in the Ro16 (again) thanks to Patrick "Flowre" Bateman. Nice dubs though. |
 2019 4chan Winter Cup |
4 | 0 | 2 | 3rd Place - Held Promotion | WON THE THIRD PLACE TROPHY. |
 2019 4chan Summer Cup |
0 | 1 | 2 | 29th Place - Relegated | Third Place curse strikes |
 2019 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
0 | 1 | 2 | 30th Place - Failed to Promote | rude autopilot |
 2020 4chan Spring Babby Cup Qualifiers |
1 | 2 | 0 | 2nd Place - Qualified | Escaped the uterus |
| 2020 4chan Spring Babby Cup |
4 | 0 | 1 | 7th Place - Promoted | 9 point curse (lost in Quarter Finals) |
 2020 4chan Summer Cup |
0 | 1 | 2 | 28th Place - Relegated | not nice |
 2020 4chan Autumn Babby Cup |
0 | 0 | 3 | 28th Place - Relegated | barely avoided the spoon lole |
 2021 4chan World Cup |
5 | 2 | 1 | 1st Place - Champions | HALLELUJAH |
Statistics and Honors
Player Statistics
Note: players in italics are no longer active.
| Player | Goals |
|---|---|
| Patrick Bateman | 86 |
| Keksandra | 53 |
| Topkek | 26 |
| Shrek | 17 |
| Nice Grill | 12 |
| Flowre | 3 |
| Cory Baxter | 3 |
| D A N K M E M E S | 2 |
| ses | 2 |
| Snek Court | 2 |
| Ebin | 1 |
| Player | Assists |
|---|---|
| Keksandra | 31 |
| Topkek | 30 |
| Patrick Bateman | 29 |
| Nice Grill | 19 |
| Ebin | 9 |
| :^) | 7 |
| Shrek | 4 |
| D A N K M E M E S | 3 |
| Ses | 3 |
| Jack Ruselel | 2 |
| Snek Court | 2 |
| Cory Baxter | 2 |
| Ass | 1 |
| Bury Smolhead | 1 |
| Gippo Dudee | 1 |
| Cowe | 1 |
| Yosho | 1 |
| Youd Be Surprise | 1 |
| Awoo~ | 1 |
| Me On The Left | 1 |
| Ojamajo Doremi | 1 |
| Shiggi Donatello | 1 |
| Fignewton | 1 |
| Quints | 1 |
| Yee | 1 |
| zrg | 1 |
| Spikeman | 1 |
| Player | Saves |
|---|---|
| Walruse | 95 |
| #fortune | 67 |
| Doge | 46 |
| Kogasa | 27 |
| Swaglord | 24 |
| Youd Be Suprise | 7 |
| Le Purple Palmtree Man | 5 |
| My OC | 4 |
| Slowpoke | 3 |
| Donut Man | 2 |
Individual Honors
2013 Autumn Fetus
Golden Boot:
Shrek, 7 goals2013 Autumn Fetus
Joint Golden Ball:
Patrick Bateman, 5 assists
2014 Summer Cup
Goal of the Tournament:
Cory Baxter, vs. /pol/
2015 Winter Cup
Joint Golden Ball:
Ebin, Nice Grill2015 Winter Cup
Player of the Tournament:
Patrick Bateman
2019 Winter Cup
Joint Best Player2019 Winter Cup
Goal of the Tournament
Nice Grill
2021 World Cup
Golden Glove
#fortune
Team Honors
2015 Winter Cup
Match of the Tournament
[s4s] - /tg/2015 Winter Cup
Best Matches
2015 Summer Cup
Match of the Tournament
/gd/ - [s4s]
2015 4chan Autumn Babby
Match of the Tournament
[s4s] - /sp/2019 Winter Cup
3rd Place
2021 World Cup
1st Place
Rivalries
You'd think the nicest team in the 4chan Cup wouldn't have rivalries, but youd be suprise :^)
Board Rivalries
Sh*tpost Bowl: 
/s4s/ v. /b/ 
Newfigs to [s4s] consider it to be a "new /b/", in that they're both filled with ironic shitposting funposting, dubs threads, and useless content OC, but everyone knows [s4s] is better, both as a board and as a team. These teams have met twice, the first time was [s4s] second match ever, in which the s4squatches won 1-0. The second time they met was in the FINALS of the 2021 4chan World Cup, which [s4s] WON 3-1 for their first ever 1st place finish and a STAR. 2W - 0D - 0L
Dumb Frogposting Bowl: /s4s/ v. /r9k/ 
Although Pepes and Sadfrogs are some of the most commonly-posted images on /r9k/, they are looked down upon on [s4s], and anyone who posts one of these images will be referred to as a "dumb frogposter". [s4s] and /r9k/ do share one similarity, however: they were, at one point, the only boards on 4chan's header board list that resided in brackets by themselves. This rivalry sat at 2 draws up until Autumn 2017, when [s4s] pulled ahead with a win, being the only team to beat /r9k/ that entire cup. 1W - 2D - 0L
Meta Rivalries
THE ETERNAL RIVALRY IS GETTING BETTER: /s4s/ v. /gd/ 
Thanks to a 3-1 win in the 2020 4chan Spring Babby Cup, [s4s] finally got their first win against the grpahics dudes and THAT FUCKING CAT Let's hope it will soon go our way :^^). 1W - 0D - 4L
Checkb Owl: /s4s/ v. /lgbt/ 
In this matchup of two provisionals, something always ends up getting checked. If [s4s] win, you check these dubs, and if /lgbt/ win, you check your FUCKING PRIVILEGE, YOU WHITE CIS SCUM. This rivalry has seen two matchups, a 1-1 draw in the 2013 Autumn Fetus, and a 2-1 /lgbt/ win in the 2014 Summer Friendlies. 0W - 1D - 1L
Friendshipb Owl aka Together Forever, Jr.: /s4s/ v. /mlp/ 
Fitting to the rivalry's name, their first face-off ended in the friendliest of results, a 1-1 draw in the 2015 4chan Winter Cup that saw both teams continue through to the knockout stages. Their second, however, was slightly less amicable, as Dubs FC pulled ahead with a 3-1 victory in the 2018 4chan Autumn Babby Cup. Despite this, both teams again advanced. >rape and the rest of the pastel ponies grabbed their first win of the rivalry in the third matchup, with a 5-2 win in the 2019 4chan Winter Cup. Yet again, both [s4s] and /mlp/ qualified for the knockout rounds. The rivalry currently stands at [s4s] being ahead after knocking out the pones in a grueling Quarter Finals of the 2021 4chan World Cup which was arguably the best match of the cup 3W - 1D - 2L
Gallery
The [s4s]-/x/ match from Winter 2015 summed up in one image.
[s4s] doing what only [s4s] can.
Keksandra rusing /adv/ defender s/adv/irgin after he allows an 87th minute Patrick Bateman goal.
[s4s]'s Summer 2017 medals enjoying a photo op en route to their first match.
Keksandra embracing the Third Place Trophy™ she and the rest of Dubs FC claimed after the 2019 Winter Cup.
[s4s] celebrating Nice Grill's 90+2 goal to tie their Round of 32 match 3-3 vs /vst/ during the 2021 4chan World Cup.
Quotes
- "But yeah seriously, /s4s/ is pretty good."
- — DrBorisG
- — DrBorisG
On his favorite team in the cup :^)
- "IT CAN'T BE, IT FUCKING CAN'T BE! OH MY GOD, IT'S FOUR FOR BATEMAN!"
- — DrBorisG
- — DrBorisG
After Patrick Bateman scored the final of five [s4s] goals against /x/ in the 2015 4chan Winter Cup.
- "BATEMAN! BATEMAN SENDS [S4S] TO WINTER!"
- — Old Man Sou
- — Old Man Sou
After Patrick Bateman scored in the 87th minute to secure a 2-1 victory over /adv/ and a berth in the 2016 4chan Winter Cup.
- "Ninety plus four, Ses on a corner kick, here we go!"
- — DrBorisG
- — DrBorisG
- "Seeeess..."
- — Jack
- — Jack
- "Here comes that pause abuse, he already got one assist on it--"
- — Kekkels
- — Kekkels
- "Nah, not unless, n--OH, OH YEAH, MAYBE, OKAY! NICE GRILL, NICE GAME! Nice Grill on the Squat Toilet! I got nothin' for this."
- — DrBorisG
- — DrBorisG
- "Well, I think we know what Goal of the Tournament is going to be."
- — Blinky
- — Blinky
The commentary booth's reaction to Nice Grill's improbable last-gasp volley against to win the 2019 4chan Winter Cup Third Place Match against /vg/.
- "Oh no, not ASS, if this ends with ASS... IT DOES, ASS WINS THE GAME FOR [s4s]!"
- — DrBorisG
- — DrBorisG
- "ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS"
- — Ken Ashcorp
- — Ken Ashcorp
Bors and Ken on the thrilling end to one of the best penalty shootouts from the 2021 World Cup
Trivia
- In '87, Huey released this; Fore!, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip To Be Square". A song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity and the importance of trends. It's also a personal statement about the band itself.
- There have been three times that one [s4s] player has scored 4 goals in a match: Shrek against /r9k/ in Autumn '13, Bateman against /x/ in Summer '15, and Keksandra against /sp/ in Winter '19. Despite this, not every match was an [s4s] victory: Shrek's double brace was not enough to take all 3 points, as a ROBOT9001 hat trick meant the game ended 4-all.
| Achievements | ||
|---|---|---|
| Elite Cups | ||
| Inaugural Champions | World Champions 2021 |
Incumbent |
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