K logo.png Congratulations /k/! K logo.png
Winners of the 2024 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

/r9k/

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Revision as of 06:34, 6 October 2014 by Shuckle (talk | contribs) (added my name/trip to IRL Manager)
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/r9k/
>tfw no gf ;_;
R9k logo.png
/r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Founded c. Winter 2011-2012
IRL manager El Negrito !!0FiEhZGyS/D
Shuckle !!QKW7kiLRIvE
Team colors
Chat color 480008
Maroon
Ranking 41 (increase 7)
Highest rank 18 ((October, 2012))
Lowest rank 33 (-)
Top scorer Robot9001 (20)
Top assister (N/A)
Captain ROBOT9001
Website /r9k/ - ROBOT9001
Nickname The Neckbears,
Arcanines,
Robots
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY
13 8 14 35 37.14%
GF GA GD
0 0 0
Biggest win
/r9k/ R9k icon.png 5–0 Cm icon.png /cm/
21 October, 2012
Biggest defeat
/r9k/ R9k icon.png 0–6 Co icon.png /co/
2 June 2012
First match
/r9k/ R9k icon.png 1–1 Soc icon.png /soc/
12 February, 2012
Elite Cup
Appearances N/A (First in N/A)
Best result N/A, N/A
Babby Cup
Appearances N/A (First in N/A)
Best result N/A, N/A
Team music
Anthem ParaPark

Goal horn Grand Finale - Forever Alone feat. Alex Theesfield
Kits


The team anticipates the chance to be alpha as fuck and meet many waifus who will be willing to b-back that ass up at El Monumental. Will they take on the field or will they finally drown on their own tear-filled basements? This team actually lacks pretty much half their physical energy due to their fapping addiction.


Tactics

Team colors: Maroon - (128,0,0) White - (255,255,255)

Roster

No. Position Player
1
  GK
WHITE KNIGHT
9
  LB
FOREVER ALONE
4
  CB
FEMINAZI
6
  CB
INNOCENT PEDOPHILE
12
  RB
LONER ANGER
5
  DMF
NECKBEARD
18
  CMF
>TFW NO GF
15
  CMF
SPAGHETTI
22
  AMF
SADFROG
21
  AMF
KISSLESS VIRGIN
23
  SS
/r9k/ player 23
No. Position Player
3
  GK
MOOTBLOXX
2
  GK
ASDF
10
  LB
DEGENERATE
11
  LB
POKEMONPROMDATE
7
  CB
POOP JUG
8
  CB
BETA AS FUCK
13
  RB
NORMALFAG
14
  RB
WIZARD
17
  DMF
MISOGYNIST
16
  DMF
GREENTEXT
19
  CMF
CHAD THUNDERCOCK
20
  CMF
OMEGLE

Goal Horns

When tfwnogf scores: >tfw no gf

When Spaghetti scores: Mom's Spaghetti

On an /r9k/ win: CRAWLIN'

Formations

Will appear once Winter occurs.

Rivalries

/r9k/ vs. /adv/: The Beta Bowl

U-umm... We're b-both too scared to pass the ball around. S-so our matches are usually 0 g-goal thrillers...

Cup History

Early managerless era

In 2012, /r9k/ had the honor of facing the debuting >gold defender in /hr/.

Due to not having a manager, /r9k/'s players could not do much to prove that they are not as beta as the board they represent. Despite not having any momentum going into the 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup, The Robots managed to find their first win ever, and it was against /mlp/. Sadly, this was not enough to qualify for the Summer Cup. While trying to recover from this heartbreak, /r9k/ finished the Summer season with a 6-0 loss to /co/, the biggest defeat in the team's history.

A rise (of hatred from others) to the finals

In the 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup, Tr4pD00r !!Riz8Z+kuSO7 took /r9k/ to new heights, but like many other events in the cup, it did not happen without controversy. The group stage saw /r9k/ get 9 points after beating some questionable competition: /u/, a team copying /sp/'s Summer Cup tactics, /vg/, a team that was using tactics given to them by /u/'s manager at the time, and /b/, a team that was rigged.

At the Round of 16, /cm/ quickly crumbled against /r9k/ in a 5-0 loss where The Neckbears had a 4-0 lead at half time. Fans went from being simply shocked with /r9k/'s winning streak to hating the team after the Beta Bowl in the quarterfinals. Despite /adv/'s defense having three purple defenders, /r9k/ couldn't break through that weak defense and only had one shot on target. /adv/'s offense was not better and after over 120 minutes of dull football, and whiny commentary, it was time for penalty kicks. In the end, it came down to who could spill less spaghetti in their shots, and /r9k/ won 3-2 in the penalty shoot-out after /adv/ missed three shots. Numerous people have gone on to call this the worst match in cup history.

Up next in the semifinals, /tv/ was hoping for an easy win against a tired /r9k/ side, but Japanese Lettuce Hardcore and Sadfrog's doubles took /r9k/ to the finals. The viewers were upset at a cup favorite being eliminated by a hated team, but would get some pleasure out of the final. /wg/'s attack easily breached /r9k/'s tired defense as their fatigue finally caught up with them. A great run came to a pitiful end with a 5-1 loss.

A miserable run summed up in one image.

Winter 2013: The losing streak gets rolling

After a failed friendly rematch against /wg/, Tr4d00r surprisingly quit his job as /r9k/'s manager. He would go on to make an autistic confession about being Lo/lit/a some time later, and so his return to /r9k/ management was (and still is) unlikely at best.

Moose !ct1wZnSHeM took over the team for the 2013 4chan Winter Cup, and proceeded to go missing for two of the three group stage matches. Despite this, /sp/ surprisingly struggled against them, but managed to win 2-1 against the Autumn Babby Cup finalists. In the following match, /cm/ got their revenge on /r9k/ with a 4-0 blowout win. Since /x/ had also lost to /sp/ on the same match day, /cm/ and /sp/ both had 6 points, thus sending /r9k/ back to a Babby Cup before the group stage was over.

Both relegated teams had a mediocre match where /x/ got a consolation win over an /r9k/ side that went from being a cup finalist to being a punching bag for everyone. After the Winter Cup was over, it was pointed out on a /vg/ thread that Moose was a /sp/artan and he would be accused of sabotaging the team. Not much came from this because he already wanted to quit after such a bad run in the Winter Cup.

Another failed manager and Arab money

>tfw !!fjYpRE2R+u2 became /r9k/'s manager for the Spring season. After losing 4-2 to /diy/ in a game where /r9k/'s early 2-0 lead meant nothing, and becoming the first team to ever lose to /c/, some wondered if /r9k/ would ever break the losing streak. After /o/ won 3-2 against /r9k/, a single fan finally lost patience with the team. He would go around on Skype offering money to 4chan Cup managers so that they would manage /r9k/, and would name himself Muzzy !vceFUCKYOU on the /vg/ threads. This man would go on to explain that the money being paid would be a "microscopic portion" of inheritance money, and that despite not being from Saudi Arabia, he is, in fact, Arabic.

No one took him up on the offer, and /r9k/ continued to lose until the group stage was over.

Dual management for Autumn

The team's manager for the 2013 Spring Babby Cup misteriously disappeared after Dragongate, and because no one felt like challenging /r9k/, the team became inactive in the Summer. Eventually, /fit/zlsperger !!PUUQhs84Yb3 took over the team and changed his name to Ronery Robot after a failed run in the 2013 4chan Summer Cup. El Negrito !!0FiEhZGyS/D joined him to help out with tactical decisions, and at first, it seemed like success was in /r9k/'s future. In the Autumn Babby Cup friendlies, /r9k/ finally broke the losing streak and started a winning streak with wins against /g/ and /3/.

This run of good form did not continue in the actual 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup. On the first match for The Robots, /r9k/ could only get a 1-0 win over a managerless /cgl/. Next, /pol/ continued their resurrection with a 4-2 win over /r9k/ where /pol/ scored three goals in under twenty minutes. The spaghetti would continue to flow in the match against /s4s/. At one point, /s4s/ was up 4-2, but /r9k/ came back to draw 4-4. This memorable comeback would only be turned into a heartbreaking end for /r9k/: /cgl/ won the match that followed against /pol/ 4-3 when the Seagulls only needed to win by one goal to take second place and crush /r9k/'s dreams. Upon the culmination of the group, Ronery Robot officially announced his retirement, saddened at not being able to take The Robots to the Winter Cup, but nonetheless glad at helping turn around what was once the laughingstock of the 4chan Cup. This will leave El Negrito in charge of /r9k/ for the future.

Spring Babby Cup Preparations

Players sport the new /r9k/ home and away kit, respectively.

Upon the resignation of his co-manager, El Negrito !!0FiEhZGyS/D signed a 6 (six) season deal to remain as manager of /r9k/ after outperforming expectations (aka not fall to fetus.) This coincided with the implementation of PES 2014, giving him the chance to recreate the team that he envisioned for the future. Being the tactical mastermind he is, his first order of business was to keep all players that were called up in the Autumn babbies and reuse the standard /r9k/ formation that brought them success. The team was embroiled in an early scandal after El Negrito allowed the players access to the team credit card and a popular camwhore site. With no money on hand for required new kits, the owner was forced to infuse capital or else the team would play with old kits from San Lorenzo, a small team a few miles south. Ongoing restrictions were still in place since Arab-gate that did not allow the team a sponsor, but the manager finally scrounged up the funds to purchase basic kits for the team’s two winter friendlies against /hr/ and /sp/, a win and a draw respectively.

Hope and Despair: 2014 Spring Babby Cup

A successful set of friendlies before the 2014 Spring Babby Cup gave the team high hopes that El Negrito could lead them to victory. In fact, many fans placed /r9k/ on their lists as the team to succeed from the group and finally be able to escape the tight grip the Babby Cup has held on them for more than a year. The first two matches, against /gd/ and /g/, /r9k/ was able to scramble for nil-nil draws to the disappointment and boredom of the fans, and even caused one manager to lose his cool at the press conference, insinuating that the team's tactics were broken and boring.

The defense finally wavered and allowed a goal against /ic/ in the third match, the offensive side simply unable to connect with anything. This match also forced /r9k/ into a tough spot of hoping other matches would go their way, allowing the team to remain viable to escape. The final match saw /r9k/'s offense finally show power, winning against /3/ by 2-1, but other matches did not go their way, effectively dooming the team to another season of pain and feel threads in the Babby Cups

Match History

Official Matches

Date Opponent Competition Result Scorers
February 12, 2012 Soc icon.png /soc/ 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup Friendlies 1-1 D Unknown
February 25, 2012 Adv icon.png /adv/ 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup Friendlies 1-3 L Unknown
March 23, 2012 Sci icon.png /sci/ 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup 1-1 D Goal 90+2' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
March 24, 2012 Pol icon.png /pol/ 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup 3-0 L
March 25, 2012 Mlp icon.png /mlp/ 2012 4chan Spring Babby Cup 2-0 W Goal 54' Kissless Virgin
Goal 80' Robot9001
May 12, 2012 Adv icon.png /adv/ 2012 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies 0-2 L
May 16, 2012 S icon.png /s/ 2012 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies 1-0 W Goal 78' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
June 2, 2012 Co icon.png /co/ 2012 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies 6-0 L
August 19, 2012 Ck icon.png /ck/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies 3-1 L Goal 78' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
September 2, 2012 Hr icon.png /hr/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies 1-1 D Goal 26' Robot9001
September 9, 2012 Cgl icon.png /cgl/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies 1-0 W Goal 22' Robot9001
October 13, 2012 U icon.png /u/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 3-2 W Goal 31' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
Scored 37' Feito-chan
Goal 86' Robot9001
October 19, 2012 B icon.png /b/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 2-1 W Goal 6'67' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
October 20, 2012 Vg icon.png /vg/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 3-2 W Goal 53'60' Robot9001
Goal 81' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
October 21, 2012 Cm icon.png /cm/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 5-0 W Goal 2'11'16' Robot9001
Goal 25' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
Goal 77' Sadfrog
October 21, 2012 Adv icon.png /adv/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 0-0 W 3-2 W on penalties
October 21, 2012 Tv icon.png /tv/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 4-2 W Goal 26'90+2' Sadfrog
Goal 36'87' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
October 21, 2012 Wg icon.png /wg/ 2012 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 1-5 L Goal 25' Japanese Lettuce Hardcore
December 8, 2012 Wg icon.png /wg/ 2013 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies 1-2 L Goal 80' Robot9001
February 9, 2013 Sp icon.png /sp/ 2013 4chan Winter Cup 1-2 L Goal 82' Shores
February 15, 2013 Cm icon.png /cm/ 2013 4chan Winter Cup 0-4 L
February 17, 2013 X icon.png /x/ 2013 4chan Winter Cup 1-2 L Goal 87' >tfw no gf
April 5, 2013 Diy icon.png /diy/ 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup Friendlies 2-4 L Goal 1'7' Robot9001
April 13, 2013 C icon.png /c/ 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup Friendlies 1-4 L Goal 34' Robot9001
May 4, 2013 O icon.png /o/ 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup 2-3 L Goal 61' Robot9001
Goal 84' >tfw no gf
May 10, 2013 U icon.png /u/ 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup 0-3 L
May 12, 2013 Mlp icon.png /mlp/ 2013 4chan Spring Babby Cup 1-2 L Goal 6' >tfw no gf
September 28, 2013 G icon.png /g/ 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies 0-1 W Goal 58' Kissless Virgin
October 5, 2013 3 icon.png /3/ 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies 1-3 W Goal 2' (pen.)57' Robot9001
Goal 90' Sadfrog
November 16, 2013 Cgl icon.png /cgl/ 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 1-0 W Goal 38' Chad Thundercock
November 22, 2013 Pol icon.png /pol/ 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 4-2 L Goal 6' >tfw no gf
Goal 21' Robot9001
November 24, 2013 S4s icon.png /s4s/ 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup 4-4 D Goal 2'67'77' Robot9001
Goal 30' Kissless Virgin
January 18, 2014 Hr icon.png /hr/ 2014 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies 2-0 W Goal 47' >tfw no gf
Goal 90+' Robot9001
January 26, 2014 Sp icon.png /sp/ 2014 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies 2-2 D Goal 28' Robot9001
Goal 44' Kissless Virgin
April 5, 2014 Gd icon.png /gd/ 2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup 0-0 D
April 11, 2014 G icon.png /g/ 2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup 0-0 D
April 12, 2014 Ic icon.png /ic/ 2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup 1-0 L
April 18, 2014 3 icon.png /3/ 2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup 2-1 W Goal 9' Sadfrog
Goal 74' Kissless Virgin
May 30, 2014 Mu icon.png /mu/ 2014 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies 1-2 L Goal 27' Robot9001
June 1, 2014 Sci icon.png /sci/ 2014 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies 1-1 D Goal 42' Sadfrog
October 18, 2014 A icon.png /a/ 2014 4chan Autumn Babby Cup
October 19, 2014 Ck icon.png /ck/ 2014 4chan Autumn Babby Cup
October 25, 2014 Out icon.png /out/ 2014 4chan Autumn Babby Cup
October 31, 2014 N icon.png /n/ 2014 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

Hall of Fame

Class of 2014