/hr/ Roster

Golds, Silvers, and Other Starters have the appropriate colored background.

Goalkeepers

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
CELEB THREADS		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	Easily the majority of threads on /hr/, celebrity threads block out almost any other content that you might want to see in high resolution. Hopefully this means he can also block balls from getting into the net.	190 / 84 / R / #99
LANDSCAPE		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	He makes for an impressive vista, and hopefully that width and height will keep balls out of the net.	182 / 85 / R / #14
WILDSCREEN		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	-	185 / 77 / R / #15

Center Back

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
MEGAPIXEL		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	The humble measurement of how high resolution something truly is.	181 / 75 / L / #32
HIGH REZ ASTRONOMY		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	Possibly the only thing posted with regularity outside of celebrity threads and automobiles. his orbital tallness will help keep the center clear of flying balls.	205 / 75 / R / #11
USER WAS WARNED		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	The more mellow of the rules enforcing twins of /hr/, he's content to tell you how you screwed up handling the ball so you can avoid doing it next time.	185 / 85 / R / #2
USER WAS BANNED		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	This man takes following the rules seriously. Stop posting requests and focus on keeping the damn ball, and maybe you'll get a mod pardon.	185 / 77 / R / #1
CELEB FAKES		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	You are not a master photoshopper and this is a high resolution board. We can tell.	185 / 78 / R / #5
XTREME VAGINA CLOSEUPS		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	It was pretty much a given somebody would want to post this sooner or later. No, he's not getting an in game face.	185 / 78 / L / #98

Defending Midfielders

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
MILA KUNIS		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	She's been in a bunch of things you watched, but you just never noticed until you saw huge hot pictures of her. She seems to be hitting her stride lately, on and off the pitch, if you discount how much she works with Seth MacFarlane	181 / 50 / R / #6	P11
EMMA STONE		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	Like Mila, you've seen her in a lot of things, and her on field performance is invigorating. If only she'd pick which hair color to stick with. On the pitch she goes with a classic dark red.	181 / 52 / R / #22	P11
WIKIFEET		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	How is this not enough feet for you?	172 / 78 / L / #4	P11
SUMMER GLAU		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	Some anon is very convinced she needs a daily thread on /hr/, but geek icon status does not make you a stater.	181 / 74 / R / #9	P11

Attacking Midfielders

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
LORD TAENGOO		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	K-pop star Taeyeon, SNSD stater by request of the fans.	193 / 72 / R / #24	P01, S01, S06
BULLY MY DICK		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	K-pop group T-ara got caught in a Three's Company style bullying scandal. You don't care though, you just wanna oggle that tall girl with the nice long legs.	189 / 66 / R / #12	P01, S01, S06
3 GALLONS PER TIT		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	Anon asked how much milk K-pop star Yura had per tit. He received a pretty definitive answer.	181 / 77 / L / #18

Right Midfielders

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
MOVIE POSTERS		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	Utilizes the power of orange blue contrast to stun his opponents into turning over the ball.	176 / 75 / R / #25	S05
>1000x1000		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	The minimum size of images postable to /hr/. His contract forces him to move to /p/ if he gets any smaller.	175 / 77 / L / #7	S04
MAX IMAGE LIMIT		Nike Mercurial Vapor VIII Teal	You've posted all the Taylor Swift pictures this thread is going to hold. Time to start the next one.	180 / 72 / R / #97

Second Strikers

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
EMMA WATSON		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	A long time 4chan fixation, Emma is no stranger to the gawking of fans. Able to operate under that kind of pressure, she keeps playing solid but quiet gold midfielding.	169 / 41 / L / #8	P03, P05, S05, S07
PICTURES OF HITLER		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	Look we get that you said World War 2 thread, and those are some very impressive period jeeps you lead off with, but we know you're just fishing for somebody to post high resolution pictures of Hitler.	175 / 75 / R / #20

Center Forwards

Name	Image	Boots	Description	Height / Weight / Foot / #	Skill cards
TAYLOR SWIFT		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	Singer, songwriter, gold second striker. She's all but officially /hr/'s goddess. Pray for goals and to avoid having a song written about how much the rest of the team sucks.	195 / 61 / R / #13	P12, S01, S02, S06
>SHE WILL NEVER KNOW		Nike Total 90 Laser IV Volt Red	Your celeb waifu? She will never know you exist. Probably because you're just a sub for a gold player.	170 / 65 / R / #23

Former Team Members

Name	Description
not /r/	Quietly let go from the team after a scandal proved he was also playing for /s/ on the side.
Yuri's Thighs	Fired for being perfect, 10/10. But seriously, the kpop references needed to be a little less generic than this.
Victoria Justice	Fired to make room for Bully My Dick, and by fired we mean bullied out of the way.
>700x700	Swallowed whole by his bigger brother.