| "The holy Bible may preach peace, but when it is Christendom itself that is threatened, it is every Christian's duty to defend all that is holy. As a philosopher, I am sometimes asked, 'Why are we here?' The answer is often complicated, but today I can say, 'We are here to kill those bastards!' When the history of our people is written, we will be honoured as men! Or as Orc, Ogre, Elf, or even Chinese! Our enemies are many, but our equals, none. There stands the otaku horde ready to fight. They have been lulled into a false sense of security by a few lines of defenders, as if that will protect them. Many times I have faced this enemy and many times I have beaten them. When we win today, this victory will be yours as much as mine. And remember, they may have the Moon People on their side, but we have lovely hats! Those hats will shield us from their fiercesome shots!
Welcome to the Pitch, gentlemen. I will not lie, the fight ahead is hard, but you have my word I will use my technical gifts to ensure your passes are given unto the team's benefit. This is the greatest reward, more than even gold, for the fate of your roster status are an eternal concern. Now come, fetch me this trophy again, I ask not for my own selfish ego but for the good of Creative Assembly."
- wegh, as recorded (and possibly embellished) by a nearby squire
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