| The logo competition for the 2025 4chan Winter Cup is now taking submissions. | ||
| The deadline is January 6th, 23:59 UTC. Logos will be placed in this gallery to facilitate discussion. This will be followed by a polling period to determine which logo will be used. Please send all submissions to Potatotron. You must supply a high-res PNG file (5000x5000 limit) and the original multi-layer source file. | ||
| Cloverleaf logo: .png .svg |
|
Cloverball logo: .ai .png .svg |
/tg/ Roster
This is the roster of players for the /tg/ Football Club.
Positions
Goalkeepers
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 52 | Emprah | 
|
He's not scheduled to rule humanity for another 21,000 years, so Tha Emprah's passing the time with sports. Allegations of him being a Tarrasque are treason. The Emprah protects, ave Imperator. | 189 (A. Average) | 125 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 45 | |
| 33 | Tankred | 
|
/tg/'s long-running goalie and former Space Marine, Tankred is currently a interned in a dreadnought. Even in death, he still serves. Indeed, Tankred's endurance is legendary. | 189 (A. Average) | 125 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 36 | |
| 12 | Gazebo | 
|
Gazebo's silhouette haunts the thoughts of many retired adventurers. Though frequently found resting, its vaguely threatening presence makes enemy strikers wary. | 185 (A. Average) | 92 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 42 |
Offense
Center Forward
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 6 | Doomrider | File:Fuckyoutorresyoutookmyfilename.jpg | He rides a possessed bike, he does cocaine, and his head's on fire. Daemon Prince of Slaanesh, /tg/'s highly popular attacking player is part of a dynamic duo with Creed. Despite countless investigations on substance abuse charges, DOOMRIDER remains on /tg/'s team. | 194 (Tall) | 85 | Right | Nike Total 90 Laser IV | (P16 – Fox in the Box) (S01 - 1-touch Play) (S02 – Outside Curve) (S20 – Double Touch) | 62 94 |
Second Striker
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 8 | Creed Ursarkar E. Creed, Lord Castellan |
File:Creed.jpg | Also known as CREEEEEEED. The leader of all Imperial forces on Cadia is one of /tg/'s iconic players and part of a dynamic duo with Doomrider. Creed is a true Tactical Genius known for his ability to make the ball, other attackers, and Baneblades appear out of nowhere. | 175 (Short) | 77 | Left | Nike CTR 360 MAESTRI | (P05 – Mazing Run) (S05 – Speed Merchant) (S08 – Turning Skills) (S14 – Deft Touch Skills) | 82 104 |
Midfield
Left Midfielders
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 60 | Mana Weave | File:Mana-Weave.jpg | If you're not rigging the game, why are you mana weaving? | 175 (Short) | 82 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P08 – Box to Box) (So1 – 1-touch Play) | 57 |
| 18 | DJ Phylactery | 
|
Recently featured in 4chan Banner Magazine, he's got a way with words. Now he plays football. Just hope his rival MC Divine Justice doesn't show up, we're still cleaning up that mess. | 180 (B. Average) | 76 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P08 – Box to Box) | 70 |
| 99 | Pun-Pun | File:Pun-pun.jpg | The ultimate exploit of the rules. There is nothing that Pun-Pun can't do. A kobold, a wizard, a god, and now a football player. Narrowly avoided missing the 2012 summer purge, and is looking to finally demonstrate his football skills. | 165 (Manlet) | 67 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 86 |
Central Midfielders
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 10 | Crazy Hassan | 
|
One of the team's main sponsors. Need a camel? Come on down to Crazy Hassan's! Or else Crazy Hassan will come to you! Free camelskin football with every purchase! | 170 (Very Short) | 79 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P08 – Box to Box) (S01 – 1-touch Play) (S05 – Speed Merchant) | 16 34 |
Right Midfielders
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 64 | /tg/ Chess | 
|
This is not your Slavic grandfather's game of chess. This is /tg/ Chess, where legends are born each and every game. The only agreed-upon point is that only faggot rollplayers play as the Queen. | 180 (A. Average) | 69 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P08 – Box to Box) (S01 – 1-touch Play) | 3 |
| 16 | Muscle Wizard | 
|
He casts FOOT. Created as a result of creative rules applications in D&D 3.5, he has very high strength and constitution, which he uses for spellcasting. | 180 (A. Average) | 95 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P04 – Box to Box) | 1 19 |
| 39 | Haggard | File:Haggard.jpg | One grim day, an ancient scroll was unearthed by a fa/tg/uy, and placed before the board's most learned scholars in an attempt to discover its hidden secrets. For years they laboured at this task, trying and failing again and again to decrypt the scroll. Finally, an epiphany came, the prophecy was unlocked, and Haggard was born. | 180 (B. Average) | 103 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 52 |
Defensive Midfielders
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 15 | Sir Bearington | 
|
A highly distinguished gentleman looking to participate in a jolly game of football. Some rather uncouth individuals refer to him as a "bear", but these allegations are clearly false. | 185 (Tall) | 122 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 88 | |
| 20 | Los Tiburon | 
|
"Shark of the Land," Los Tiburon is a half-orc wrestler that tackles dragons and rivals with unmatched prowess. Watch out for 20s. | 185 (A. Average) | 95 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 27 | |
| 13 | Old Man Henderson | 
|
An eccentric old man who won Call of Cthulhu. Has joined the /tg/ team in order to locate some or all of his lost lawn gnomes, or, as he calls them, his "WEE MEN." Having thoroughly searched the goal box for gnomes, he has been moved out to Defense so he can search for gnomes (and balls) there. | 180 (B. Average) | 83 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 47 | |
| 24 | Cultist-Chan | 
|
One of /tg/'s many waifus, with the distinction of being EXTRA heretical and extra-annoying. Hwee Kaptoored Eet Fhor Kay-oss! Let's hope Old Man Henderson doesn't realize that she's a cultist. | 175 (Short) | 72 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 72 | |
| 0 | Noh | 
|
Steadfastly refuses to let anyone get past her, and won't let anyone take the ball away from her. "Can we take this ball?" "No." | 170 (Very Short) | 61 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P01 - Classic No.10) | 35 |
Defense
Centre Backs
| Number | Name | Image | Description | Height (cm) | Weight (kg) | Footedness | Boots | Skill cards | Celebration |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Nigramarines | 
|
Nigramarines is from a Space Marine chapter created on /b/ before the existence of /tg/. One of the oldest players, and currently captain, Nigramarines still remembers Warhammer Wednesdays and the battles fought to keep the pool closed in order to protect Imperial citizens from Nurgle's corrupting plague. | 205 (Fuckhuge) | 125 | Right | Mizuno Morelia Neo | (P17 – Offensive Sideback) (S01 – 1-touch Play) (S24 – Lunging Tackle) | 74 |
| 2 | Thin Your Paints | 
|
Forget what you've been told, this is the golden rule. Its physical avatar has donned the blue and orange, taking the field for his home club. His face is cursed as a grim reminder of thick paints and the evils they work. | 194 (Tall) | 125 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 50 | |
| 7 | Atlas | 
|
With a recognizable assault-class tonnage of 100, this stalwart gentleman towers over the battlefield and unleashes a special brand of pain down from a nigh-untouchable fortress. | 199 (Very Tall) | 100 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 79 | |
| 90 | Anal Circumference | 
|
Get those d100s out and get ready to roll for Anal Circumference. Just figure out your modifiers first, and remember that babbies are considered "infants" and take a -90 to the roll. | 185 (A. Average) | 83 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 96 | |
| 4 | Deep Rot | 
|
One of the many agents controlled by the inter-planar undead supercomputer. Deep Rot is one of /tg/'s sponsors, providing necro-computational power. | 180 (B. Average) | 72 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 101 | |
| 46 | That Guy | 
|
You hate him, I hate him, everyone hates him - but he just keeps on turning up. That Fucking Guy. He didn't even bring snacks for the team. | 180 (B. Average) | 90 | Left | Mizuno Morelia Neo | 1 |
Former Players
2012 Winter Cup Era
/tg/'s roster underwent very little changes after its first cup competition.
The most fabled dish of /tg/ cuisine, regarded as the Orkiest of all possible meals a fa/tg/uy could consume. It's meat with bread. Cut in an effort to slim down, and to make room for others.
2012 Summer Cup Era
After a difficult run through the 2012 4chan Summer Cup, /tg/ voted to overhaul the roster, cutting several players from the team.
- Transparent Orange Chainsaw
Despite being an apt player, an Administratum investigation revealed that T.O. Chainsaw was included on the /tg/ team in place of Amazo the Wonder Golem as a result of a Classic Blunder. The oversight was corrected, and Transparent Orange Chainsaw was transferred to /toy/ (under the name Orange Transparent Chainsaw).
Did not renew contract, claimed to be looking forward to having more time just to himself.
- Special Snowflake
Dropped for being too special, but not special enough. Picked up by /lgbt/ in Spring 2013, currently a starting striker on their squad.
Retired to playtest the astral plane.
Retired to a villa in Italy after a good run. Maids claims that she will still support /tg/, but this time on the sidelines.
Everything went according to keikaku, and Just As Planned's contract has concluded to the satisfaction of all involved parties.
- Black Lotus
Prohibitive resigning costs prompted management to trade Black Lotus for Mana Weave.
2013 Winter Cup Era
A disappointingly early exit from the 2013 4chan Winter Cup did not result in a complete overhaul of the roster, rather only small tweaks were made.
- Quest Quest
Quest Quest was well-liked in the /tg/ clubhouse, but her countless retarded cousins were not. She was cut from the roster as a result.
- Bloody Magpies
Renewed interest from the Blood Ravens football association caused Bloody Magpies to gift himself back to his home club.
- Do You Catan?
During his sojourn with the club, he had seen infinity and truly experienced love. He retired after the 2013 Winter Cup, in order to properly channel his efforts toward the unreachable unknown.
- Coasters
Coasters was quietly released from the team after a heated argument about the condition of the manager's coffee table.
2013 Summer Cup Era
After a historically-poor finish in the 2013 4chan Summer Cup and the club's relegation, a slew of changes were made to the team roster.
- Kromgol
Kromgol did not get much opportunity, only participating in one cup with the club. Nevertheless, the team cut him loose and Kromgol returned to his first love, getting drunk and hitting things.
- The Whizzard
Another casualty after only one cup, the Whizzard did not mesh with his teammates in the locker room, creating to an uncomfortable and unnerving atmosphere with his “jokes”.