/s4s/

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[s4s] (stylized /s4s/ for cup play) is a virtual professional football team representing the Shit 4chan Says board on 4chan. [s4s], as a board, was originally thought to be an April Fools' joke, but is now home to some of the D A N K E S T M E M E S and best GETs on all of 4chan. The team's cup history is long and winding, with [s4s] having played in every level of the cup, ranging from the first ever Babby Cup Qualifiers to the Elite level of play. [s4s]'s most recent cup performance was a 19th-place finish in the 2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup, and as such they will be participating in the 2018 4chan Autumn Babby Cup. GED HYB! :DDD

We now have an Ebin Nice Discord for all you nice fans!

For when we win the cup: Hallelujah - Valinor Quartet

/s4s/
Hodie, Sunt Commemorentur
S4s logo.png
/s4s/ - Shit 4chan Says
Founded May 17, 2013
Manager Huey Lewis
Owner ETi, Inc.
Gippo Dudee
IRL manager Shouganaina !!+HJ7qWns8oA
DoubleNigger !!+4tTJJnz3W+
Fapoleon !!vLW/0AZEhwG
Team colors
HEX color DAA520
 :^) Gold
Ranking 41 (steady)
Highest rank 7th (Post-Spring '15)
Lowest rank 44th (Post-Autumn '13)
Top scorer Patrick Bateman (51)
Top assister Topkek (16)
Captain Patrick Bateman
Website /s4s/ - Shit 4chan Says
Nickname [s4s]quatches
Shitp4sterS
Dubs FC
Home ground Unchecked Dubs Memorial Stadium
Historic performance
W D L TOTAL EFFICIENCY
27 11 23 61 44.26%
GF GA GD
113 105 +8
Biggest win
/s4s/ S4s icon.png 5–0 X icon.png /x/
20 February 2015
Biggest defeat
/ic/ Ic icon.png 5–0 S4s icon.png /s4s/
26 April 2014
First match
/gd/ Gd icon.png 3–1 S4s icon.png /s4s/
12 July 2013
Elite Cup
Appearances 7 (First in 2014 4chan Summer Cup)
Best result 5th, 2015 4chan Winter Cup
Babby Cup
Appearances 5 (First in 2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup)
Best result 5th, 2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup
Team music
Anthem All Star
Group Stage Victory Anthem Jazz Star
RO16 Victory Anthem Romance Star
Keksandra MotM Victory Anthem Boris x Keksandra

Goal horn Hip To Be Square
Alternate goal horn I Need Dubs (Dubs goalhorn and Brace goalhorn)
Alternate goal horn KEK (For Topkek)
Alternate goal horn Hey There Keksandra (Keksandra goalhorn)
Kits
Home kit S4shome wc2015.png
Away kit S4saway-2016sc.png
Third kit S4s kit 4.png
Fourth kit S4s kit 3.png
Fifth kit S4sthird-2016sc.png


Roster

See also:

No. Position Player
  GK
#fortune
Yosho
Dubs
Flube
:^)
ses
Swaglord
Nice Grill
Keksandra
Topkek
Patrick BatemanCaptain
No. Position Player
  GK
youd be suprise
Ass
wew lad
Cowe
snek court
Ebin
Jack Ruselel
Merula
zrg
Introducing
Flowre
Bury Ebil

History

For older history: /s4s/ history

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup

After the disappointment of the previous Autumn, Dubs FC and its supporters were looking towards the upcoming Spring for positive results. Returning this tournament was the Megababby format, [s4s] were drawn into Group B, along with /t/, /c/, /a/ and /jp/. The first group match, against /jp/, went mostly to plan, as a Bateman goal and a kek-worthy Slut Sanae own goal gave [s4s] a 2-0 win. However, :^) was a little too cheeky, and got himself sent off through a straight red card obtained in added time of the first half. The second match, however, did not turn out as well, with the other half of the [a/jp] duo running rampant and winning 2-1. [s4s] led at one point in the match, with Bateman opening the scoring in the 19th minute, but /a/ eventually managed to have some of what would become 12 shots hit the back of the net. The third match, against much-maligned /t/ was what one would call "a punch to the throat". [s4s] went down by a goal twice (with 50 Threads and ThePirateBay scoring at 24 and 55 minutes respectively), and both times were able to draw level, with Bateman responding in the 41st and Keksandra leaving the second equalizer until the 87th minute. However, >uTorrent again flung the Pirates in front at the death, and repeating the feat a third time was simply too much for [s4s]. The fourth and final match against /c/ was a solid 3-1 victory, a back-and-forth match in which [s4s] were able to convert their chances, with Bateman bagging a brace and Keksandra getting a goal of her own two minutes into added time. Dubs FC looked to have done enough to get through to the next round of play with their acquired point tally. Alas, /jp/, having a match in hand, were able to control their own destiny, and they did exactly that, dispatching of /c/ with a 5-2 win, and leaving [s4s] stuck in the Babbies on 6 points for the second Cup in a row.

Match History

Match Date Opponent Competition Result Goal Scorers
July 12, 2013

Gd icon.png /gd/

2013 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies

3-1 L

Shrek Goal 86'

July 20, 2013

B icon.png /b/

2013 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies

1-0 W

Quads Goal 22'

September 21, 2013

An icon.png /an/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies

2-0 L
October 5, 2013

Fa icon.png /fa/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Friendlies

1-0 W

Shrek Goal 36'

October 25, 2013

O icon.png /o/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers

4-2 W

Shrek Goal 13'40'
Patrick Bateman Goal 35'
Top Kek Goal 48'

October 26, 2013

3 icon.png /3/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers

3-0 W

Patrick Bateman Goal 50'
Shrek Goal 70'78'

October 27, 2013

Wsg icon.png /wsg/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers

2-1 W

Shrek Goal 70'77'

October 27, 2013

Lgbt icon.png /lgbt/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers

1-1 D

Shrek Goal 65'

November 16, 2013

Pol icon.png /pol/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

2-1 L

Shrek Goal 34'

November 22, 2013

Cgl icon.png /cgl/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

1-1 D

Shrek Goal 65'

November 24, 2013

R9k icon.png /r9k/

2013 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

4-4 D

Shrek Goal 18'37'52'65'

January 11, 2014

Vg icon.png /vg/

2014 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies

1-0 L
January 19, 2014

Trv icon.png /trv/

2014 4chan Winter Cup Friendlies

1-1 D

Shrek Goal 56'

April 6, 2014

O icon.png /o/

2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

2-1 L

[s4s]-Tan Goal 90+'

April 11, 2014

Tv icon.png /tv/

2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

3-3 D

Patrick Bateman Goal 16'71'
[s4s]-Tan Goal 59'

April 13, 2014

Vr icon.png /vr/

2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

1-0 W Patrick Bateman Goal 42'
April 19, 2014

Hr icon.png /hr/

2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

2-1 W Patrick Bateman Goal 13'70'
April 26, 2014

Ic icon.png /ic/

2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup Round of 16

5-0 L
May 31, 2014

Lgbt icon.png /lgbt/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies

2-1 L Patrick Bateman Goal 33'
June 7, 2014

Hm icon.png /hm/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Friendlies

2-1 W [s4s]-Tan Goal 34'39'
July 19, 2014

Soc icon.png /soc/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

4-2 W Cory Baxter Goal 16'37'
Patrick Bateman Goal 33'
[s4s]-Tan Goal 82'
July 26, 2014

Pol icon.png /pol/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

2-2 D

Cory Baxter Goal 42'
[s4s]-Tan Goal 74'

July 27, 2014

Asp icon.png /asp/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

2-1 L

Topkek Goal 73'

July 27, 2014

X icon.png /x/

2014 4chan Summer Cup Knockout Stages

1(6)-1(5) L

[s4s]-Tan Goal 81'

February 14, 2015

M icon.png /m/

2015 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

3-0 W

Topkek Goal 8'76'
Nice Grill Goal 29'

February 20, 2015

X icon.png /x/

2015 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

5-0 W

Dubs Goal 41'
Patrick Bateman Goal 44'58'60'66'

February 22, 2015

Mlp icon.png /mlp/

2015 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

1-1 D

[s4s]-Tan Goal 3'

February 28, 2015

Sci icon.png /sci/

2015 4chan Winter Cup Round of 16

3-0 W

D A N K M E M E S Goal 13'69'
Patrick Bateman Goal 45+'

March 1, 2015

Tg icon.png /tg/

2015 4chan Winter Cup Quarterfinals

3-2 L

Patrick Bateman Goal 15'
Nice Grill Goal 25'

July 31, 2015

Mu icon.png /mu/

2015 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

1-1 D Patrick Bateman Goal 65'
August 2, 2015

Sci icon.png /sci/

2015 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

4-1 W [s4s]-Tan Goal 4'74'83'
Patrick Bateman Goal 34'
August 8, 2015

Gd icon.png /gd/

2015 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

4-3 L Patrick Bateman Goal 13'44'70'
October 24, 2015

3 icon.png /3/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

1-0 W Patrick Bateman Goal 34'
October 30, 2015

A icon.png /a/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

3-1 L Patrick Bateman Goal 71'
November 1, 2015

Toy icon.png /toy/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

4-3 W Patrick Bateman Goal 4'90+'
[s4s]-Tan Goal 30'
Ebin Goal 42'
November 8, 2015

Adv icon.png /adv/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

2-1 W [s4s]-Tan Goal 18'
Patrick Bateman Goal 87'
November 14, 2015

Sp icon.png /sp/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Round of 16

4-3 W Patrick Bateman Goal 31'78'
Topkek Goal 40'
Snek Court Goal 111'
November 15, 2015

Pol icon.png /pol/

2015 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Quarterfinals

2-0 L
February 20, 2016

G icon.png /g/

2016 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

4-0 W Patrick Bateman Goal 7'73'85'
[s4s]-Tan Goal 29'
February 26, 2015

R9k icon.png /r9k/

2016 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

1-1 D Patrick Bateman Goal 25'
February 28, 2016

Gd icon.png /gd/

2016 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

4-0 L
March 5, 2016

Asp icon.png /asp/

2016 4chan Winter Cup Round of 16

2(4)-2(3) W Nice Grill Goal 41'
Patrick Bateman Goal 59'
March 6, 2016

Mu icon.png /mu/

2016 4chan Winter Cup Quarterfinals

3-2 L Topkek Goal 14'
Patrick Bateman Goal 45+3'
August 6, 2016

M icon.png /m/

2016 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

2-2 D Topkek Goal 38'
Patrick Bateman Goal 61'
August 12, 2016

Tv icon.png /tv/

2016 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

2-1 W Topkek Goal 35'
Patrick Bateman Goal 42'
August 14, 2016

Biz icon.png /biz/

2016 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

2-1 W Patrick Bateman Goal 30'
Nice Grill Goal 53'
August 20, 2016

Adv icon.png /adv/

2016 4chan Summer Cup Round of 16

3-0 L
February 11, 2017

N icon.png /n/

2017 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

3-1 W Topkek Goal 21'
Patrick Bateman Goal 53'80'
February 17, 2017

Asp icon.png /asp/

2017 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

1-0 L
February 19, 2017

U icon.png /u/

2017 4chan Winter Cup Group Stages

2-1 W Topkek Goal 38'43'
February 25, 2017

Gd icon.png /gd/

2017 4chan Winter Cup Round of 16

5-2 L Patrick Bateman Goal 45+0'58'
July 28, 2017

His icon.png /his/

2017 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

3-2 L Patrick Bateman Goal 18'
Keksandra Goal 90+2'
July 30, 2017

Asp icon.png /asp/

2017 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

3-3 D Patrick Bateman Goal 48'90+0'
Keksandra Goal 7'
August 5, 2017

Wg icon.png /wg/

2017 4chan Summer Cup Group Stages

1-2 L Keksandra Goal 90+2'
October 27, 2017

A icon.png /a/

2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

1-3 L Patrick Bateman Goal 45+0'
October 29, 2017

Vp icon.png /vp/

2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

1-2 W Patrick Bateman Goal 21'90+0'
October 29, 2017

R9k icon.png /r9k/

2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Group Stages

2-1 W TOPKEK Goal 15'59'
May 4,2018

Jp icon.png /jp/

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

2-0 W Patrick Bateman Goal 23'
Slut Sanae Scored 30'
May 6,2018

A icon.png /a/

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

1-2 L Patrick Bateman Goal 19'
May 11,2018

T icon.png /t/

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

2-3 L Patrick Bateman Goal 41'
Keksandra Goal 87'
May 14,2018

C icon.png /c/

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup Group Stages

3-1 W Patrick Bateman Goal 8'53'
Keksandra Goal 90+2'

Export

Current Exports

2018 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

Legacy Exports

Honors/Statistics

Individual Honors

Team Honors

Player Stats

Note: players in italic are no longer on the team.

Goals and Assists

Player Goals Assists
Patrick Bateman 51 14
Keksandra 18 12
Shrek 17 4
Topkek 14 16
Nice Grill 4 8
Cory Baxter 3 1
D A N K M E M E S 2 5
Ebin 1 7
Snek Court 1 3
Quads 1 0
:^) 0 4
Awoo~ 0 1
Me On The Left 0 1
Yee 0 1
Youd Be Surprise 0 1
Cowe 0 1
Ojamajo Doremi 0 1

Saves

Player Saves
Walruse 50
Doge 28
Eh? You've Never Seen a Pair of Breasts Before? 27
Swaglord 20
#fortune 11
Le Purple Palmtree Man 5
My OC 4
Slowpoke 3
Donut Man 2

Past Cup Performances

Rivalries

You'd think the nicest team in the 4chan Cup wouldn't have rivalries, but youd be suprise :^)

Board-Based Rivalries

Sh*tpost Bowl: S4s icon.png /s4s/ v. /b/ B icon.png

Newfigs to [s4s] consider it to be a "new /b/", in that they're both filled with ironic shitposting funposting, dubs threads, and useless content OC, but everyone knows [s4s] is better, both as a board and as a team. The only official Cup match these two teams have ever played against each other was [s4s]'s second ever, and it ended in a 1-0 win for [s4s].

1W - 0D - 0L

Dumb Frogposting Bowl: S4s icon.png /s4s/ v. /r9k/ R9k icon.png

Although Pepes and Sadfrogs are some of the most commonly-posted images on /r9k/, they are looked down upon on [s4s], and anyone who posts one of these images will be referred to as a "dumb frogposter". [s4s] and /r9k/ do share one similarity, however: they were, at one point, the only boards on 4chan's header board list that resided in brackets by themselves. This rivalry sat at 2 draws up until Autumn 2017, when [s4s] pulled ahead with a win, being the only team to beat /r9k/ that entire cup.

1W - 2D - 0L

Meta Rivalries

"Seriously Guys It's Not Funny Anymore": S4s icon.png /s4s/ v. /gd/ Gd icon.png

NEVER EVER.

0W - 0D - 4L

Checkb Owl: S4s icon.png /s4s/ v. /lgbt/ Lgbt icon.png

In this matchup of two provisionals, something always ends up getting checked. If [s4s] win, you check these dubs, and if /lgbt/ win, you check your FUCKING PRIVILEGE, YOU WHITE CIS SCUM. This rivalry has seen two matchups, a 1-1 draw in the 2013 Autumn Fetus, and a 2-1 /lgbt/ win in the 2014 Summer Friendlies.

0W - 1D - 1L

Quotes

"But yeah seriously, /s4s/ is pretty good."
DrBorisG, on his favorite team in the cup :^)


"IT CAN'T BE, IT FUCKING CAN'T BE! OH MY GOD, IT'S FOUR FOR BATEMAN!"
DrBorisG, after Patrick Bateman scored his fourth goal - and [s4s]'s 5th of the match - against /x/ in the 2015 4chan Winter Cup


"BATEMAN! BATEMAN SENDS [S4S] TO WINTER!"
Old Man Sou, after Patrick Bateman scored in the 87th minute to secure a 2-1 victory over /adv/ and a berth in the 2016 4chan Winter Cup.


Photo Gallery

Trivia/Fun Facts

  • In '87, Huey released this; Fore!, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip To Be Square". A song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity and the importance of trends. It's also a personal statement about the band itself.
  • There have been two times that a single [s4s] player has scored 4 goals in a match: Shrek against /r9k/ in Autumn '13, and Bateman against /x/ in Summer '15. However, only one of these matches ended in an [s4s] victory: The latter match.
  • [s4s]'s largest victory and worst loss are both currently by 5 goals to 0 (victory: over /x/, loss: against /ic/).