2013 4chan Summer Cup Group D

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Summary

Matchday 1

This matchup of two storied Elites ended in a dramatic draw, as poor conditioning on /int/ was matched by spaghetti and missed plays by /tg/ in the first half of the game. /int/'s only good forward, Polandball, scored a goal early in the first half, only to have the moment ruined by the crash of PES. It seemed that we might witness a repeat of /tg/'s friendly match with /v/. A series of minor tweaks and subs by TheDM proved the tactical genius of /tg/'s strategy, with team sponsor Crazy Hassan and cocaine-fueled madman Doomrider tying the match with impressive plays.

Underdog team /u/ completely blew out /fit/ in an orgy of cute girls and bloodletting. In a surprise tweest, both managers were absent during the match, leaving the game entirely to prepared tactics. Shock and awe followed the anthems as /u/ demolished the /fit/ defence and prevented the Elite team from scoring or even challenging their dominance on the field.

Matchday 2

After this game, we can safely say /fit/ is the Sick Man of the 4chan Cup. With an impressive 8.0 performance by /int/ favorite Putin, /int/ secured the death of one of their rival Elites and brought Mother Russia the glory of victory. We fear the day we see a red Polanball, Putin, and Spurdo, for they will surely be unstoppable then.

Against a strong 4-4-2 formation led by ace striker Homuhomu, with their defenders covered in blue conditioning, /tg/ rolled under the skillcheck needed to stop /u/. But hope was not lost, and the purest form of love and COOOOCAAAAIIIIIINNNNNEEEEE found themselves equally motivating as /tg/ and /u/ ended a nail-biting match with a game-tying hat trick by Doomrider.

Matchday 3

With the DEP fix and the game unrigged, /tg/ was unable to overcome the dense /fit/ defense. Zyzz scored a quick goal and took the lead in the match, a match that quickly descended into murderball, with /fit/ player Steroid getting a red card in the second half of the game. Despite a lucky shot by Crazy Hassan, the purple conditioning of Muscle Wizard and /tg/'s offence getting swamped by the super-defensive /fit/ formation meant that there were very few chances for the Fa/tg/uys to shoot. Missed headers, wide shots, and disappointing play by The Whizzard cost /tg/ the game. /fit/ dragged another elite down with them, setting the stage for a brutal revenge match in the Autumn Babby Cup.

Standings

Team Pld W D L GF GA GD Pts
U icon.png /u/ 3 2 1 0 9 4 5 7
Int icon.png /int/ 3 1 1 1 7 5 2 4
Fit icon.png /fit/ 3 1 0 2 3 9 -6 3
Tg icon.png /tg/ 3 0 2 1 6 7 -1 2


/int/ v /tg/

Stadium: Campo de Futbol de Vallecas 16 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1340
Int logo.png /int/ 2–2 /tg/ Tg logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Polandball Goal 15'
Putin Goal 26'
Goal 69' Crazy Hassan
Goal 83' Doomrider



GK 20 Fuck Off, We're Full
RB 9 Yuropoor
CB 15 yDNA Haplogroup Substituted off 66'
CB 10 Pay Debnts
LB 11 Las Malvinas Booked 66'
DM 16 Iranian Furry
DM 4 Non-Country Substituted off 66'
AM 7 >argentina >white
AM 17 Spurdo Sparde
AM 21 Polandball
CF 23 Putin
Substitutions:
CB 6 Master Race Substituted in 66'
DM 13 Muh Heritage Substituted in 66'
Manager:
isa !!EA4m1qko0c/
2013sc group d-int tg.png
GK 33 Tankred Endures
RB 15 Sir Bearington
CB 1 Nigramarines
CB 46 That Guy Substituted off 66'
LB 24 Cultist-chan
DM 64 /tg/ Chess Substituted off 66'
DM 60 Mana Weave Substituted off 66'
CM 11 Creed
RW 16 Muscle Wizard
LW 32 Crazy Hassan
CF 9 Doomrider
Substitutions:
CB 0 Anal Circumference Substituted in 66'
DM 13 O.M. Henderson Substituted in 66'
DM 24 Pun-Pun Substituted in 66'
Manager:
The DM !!4ejBZS7hAn9

Man of the Match:
Doomrider (/tg/)

Match Stats
3 (3) Shots (On Target) 5 (3)
5 (2) Fouls (Offside) 5 (3)
0 Free Kicks 5
0 Free Kicks scored 0
4 Corner Kicks 1
13 Interceptions 21
56% Possession 44%
75% Passes Completed 86%
10 Tackles Won 8
1 Saves 1

Note: PES froze at 17:09, probably because of the excessive /tg/ WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH chants. The streamer decided to crash PES on purpose and restarted the game at the point where it froze, with /int/ leading 1-0 (the score at the time of freezing).

/fit/ v /u/

Stadium: Wembley Stadium 16 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1324
Fit logo.png /fit/ 0–4 /u/ U logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Goal 39' Purest Form Of Love
Goal 52' Homuhomu
Goal 60'67' Teru Time



GK 1 Scooby
RB 5 Do You Even Lift
CB 3 Muh Gains
CB 15 6'4
LB 12 Squatz Substituted off 73'
RM 11 Tinytrip
CM 13 Gomad Substituted off 71'
CM 19 Insecurity Substituted off 73'
LM 6 No Homo
CF 20 Jeff Seid
CF 9 Zyzz
Substitutions:
CM 4 Dmitry Klokov Substituted in 71'
CM 8 Ottermode Substituted in 73'
LB 24 Steroids Substituted in 73'
Manager:
/fit/zlsperger !!PUUQhs84Yb3
2013sc group d-fit u.png
GK 13 Madokami
RB 9 Ume-Tentei
CB 16 Goggles
CB 17 Onee-sama
LB 10 Science Babies
CM 8 Bitchnatsu Substituted off 63'
CM 1 Macarons Substituted off 64'
RM 7 Teru Time
AM 19 Purest Form of Love
LM 6 Akkarin Booked 63'
CF 69 Homuhomu
Substitutions:
CM 5 Archery Club Substituted in 63'
CM 9 Erica Hartmann Substituted in 64'
Manager:
retortelement !!sDQQboD5H1f

Man of the Match:
Teru Time (/u/)

Match Stats
5 (3) Shots (On Target) 6 (5)
0 (0) Fouls (Offside) 2 (0)
2 Free Kicks 0
0 Free Kicks scored 0
3 Corner Kicks 1
15 Interceptions 18
54% Possession 46%
85% Passes Completed 83%
7 Tackles Won 15
1 Saves 3

/int/ v /fit/

Stadium: Konami Stadium 18 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1510
Int logo.png /int/ 4–1 /fit/ Fit logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Putin Goal 22'34'65'
Spurdo Spadre Goal 78'
Goal 69' Muh Gains



GK 5 The Janitor
RB 9 Yuropoor Booked 69'
CB 15 yDNA Haplogroup Substituted off 78'
CB 22 Hilo Latino
LB 11 Las Malvinas
DM 13 Muh Heritage Booked 25' Substituted off 84'
DM 12 /int/erpals Substituted off 84'
AM 7 >argentina >white
AM 21 Polandball
AM 17 Spurdo Spadre
CF 23 Putin
Substitutions:
CB 6 Master Race Substituted in 78'
DM 16 Iranian Furry Substituted in 84'
DM 19 Rare Flag Substituted in 84'
Manager:
isa !!EA4m1qko0c/
2013sc group d-int fit.png
GK 1 Scooby
RB 16 Oatz
CB 2 Gyno
CB 3 Muh Gains
LB 12 Squatz
RM 11 Tinytrip
CM 19 Insecurity Substituted off 78'
CM 7 Manlet Booked 59'
LM 6 No Homo
CF 20 Jeff Seid
CF 9 Zyzz
Substitutions:
CM 4 Dmitry Klokov Substituted in 78'
Manager:
/fit/zlsperger !!PUUQhs84Yb3

Man of the Match:
Putin (/int/)

Match Stats
7 (6) Shots (On Target) 4 (1)
4 (0) Fouls (Offside) 2 (0)
2 Free Kicks 4
0 Free Kicks scored 0
1 Corner Kicks 1
27 Interceptions 20
50% Possession 50%
76% Passes Completed 76%
10 Tackles Won 8
0 Saves 2

/tg/ v /u/

Stadium: Alpha Complex 18 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1519
Tg logo.png /tg/ 3–3 /u/ U logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Doomrider Goal 19'35'72' Goal 16'42' Homuhomu
Goal 52' Teru Time



GK 33 Tankred
RB 6 Kromgol
CB 1 Nigramarines Substituted off 83'
CB 0 Anal Circumference
LB 20 Los Tiburon Substituted off 66'
DM 64 /tg/ Chess
DM 10 Pun-Pun Substituted off 66'
CM 11 Creed
RM 32 Crazy Hassan
LM 9 Doomrider
CF 16 Muscle Wizard
Substitutions:
CB 19 Deep Rot Substituted in 66'
DM 13 O.M. Henderson Substituted in 66'
LB 3 Atlas Substituted in 83'
Manager:
The DM !!4ejBZS7hAn9
2013sc group d-tg u.png
GK 22 Reo Kawamura
RB 31 Kigo
CB 44 Angst and Drama
CB 2 Namori
LB 21 Feito-chan
RM 12 Teru Time
CM 4 Bitchnatsu Substituted off 66'
CM 55 Symmetrical Docking Substituted off 66'
LM 14 Akkarin
CF 10 Homuhomu
CF 11 Purest Form of Love
Substitutions:
CM 50 Houkago Tea Time Substituted in 66'
CM 5 Archery Club Substituted in 66'
Manager:
retortelement !!sDQQboD5H1f

Man of the Match:
Doomrider (/tg/)

Match Stats
9 (6) Shots (On Target) 9 (7)
1 (0) Fouls (Offside) 2 (0)
2 Free Kicks 1
0 Free Kicks scored 0
1 Corner Kicks 2
18 Interceptions 20
51% Possession 49%
78% Passes Completed 80%
9 Tackles Won 13
3 Saves 3

/fit/ v /tg/

Stadium: Alpha Complex 24 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1192
Fit logo.png /fit/ 2–1 /tg/ Tg logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Zyzz Goal 9'34' Goal 39' Crazy Hassan



GK 22 Hodgetwins
RB 16 Oatz
CB 21 T-Rex
CB 18 Rippletits
LB 10 Bear Mode Substituted off 70'
RM 11 Tinytrip Booked 47'
CM 7 Manlet
CM 8 Ottermode Booked 54'
LM 6 No Homo
CF 20 Jeff Seid
CF 9 Zyzz
Substitutions:
LB 14 Steroids Substituted in 70' Red card 72'
Manager:
/fit/zlsperger !!PUUQhs84Yb3
2013sc group d-fit tg.png
GK 18 The Whizzard
RB 15 Sir Bearington
CB 24 Cultist-chan
LB 3 Atlas Booked 8' Substituted off 70'
DM 20 Los Tiburon
DM 19 Deep Rot Booked 52' Substituted off 70'
AM 64 /tg/ Chess
AM 11 Creed Booked 13'
RW 32 Crazy Hassan
CF 9 Doomrider
LW 16 Muscle Wizard
Substitutions:
RM 0 Anal Circumference Substituted in 70'
DM 60 Mana Weave Substituted in 70'
Manager:
The DM !!4ejBZS7hAn9

Man of the Match:
Zyzz (/fit/)

Match Stats
5 (3) Shots (On Target) 6 (3)
5 (0) Fouls (Offside) 6 (1)
6 Free Kicks 5
0 Free Kicks scored 0
2 Corner Kicks 1
15 Interceptions 22
53% Possession 47%
81% Passes Completed 81%
12 Tackles Won 10
3 Saves 0

/u/ v /int/

Stadium: Alpha Complex 24 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1178
U logo.png /u/ 2–1 /int/ Int logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Homuhomu Goal 14' (pen.)75' Goal 89' Putin



GK 33 Spitting Distance
RB 31 Kigo Substituted off 66'
CB 23 Goggles
CB 2 Namori
LB 28 Science Babies Substituted off 66'
DM 4 Bitchnatsu Substituted off 66'
DM 55 Symmetrical Docking
RM 12 Teru Time
AM 11 Purest Form of Love
LM 14 Akkarin
CF 10 Homuhomu
Substitutions:
LB 39 Shiznat Substituted in 66'
RB 20 Befriending Substituted in 66'
DM 5 Archery Club Substituted in 66'
Manager:
retortelement !!sDQQboD5H1f
2013sc group d-u int.png
GK 20 Fuck Off We're Full
RB 18 Remove Kebab Red card 45+'
CB 3 Huehuehuehuehue
CB 22 Hilo Latino
LB 1 Engrish
DM 16 Iranian Furry Substituted off 66'
DM 13 Muh Heritage Booked 32' Substituted off 45'
CM 7 >argentina >white
AM 21 Polandball
AM 17 Spurdo Spadre
CF 23 Putin
Substitutions:
DM 9 Yuropoor Substituted in 45'
DM 19 Rare Flag Substituted in 66' Booked 74'
Manager:
isa !!EA4m1qko0c/

Man of the Match:
Akkarin (/u/)

Match Stats
7 (4) Shots (On Target) 5 (4)
1 (0) Fouls (Offside) 5 (0)
4 Free Kicks 1
0 Free Kicks scored 0
1 Corner Kicks 3
24 Interceptions 20
51% Possession 49%
78% Passes Completed 74%
9 Tackles Won 12
3 Saves 2