2013 4chan Summer Cup Group H

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Summary

Matchday 1

Proving that unusual formations only work sometimes, fan underdog /ck/ blew out fascist dictator favorite /pol/ in a hard-fought match that saw /ck/'s clean sheet anthem played for the first time. The predicted ultra-elite /pol/ found itself completely shut down by /ck/'s cast iron defense, with even Doom Paul incapable of making it happen.

Poor-form /co/ and continual disappointment /sci/ met today in a long, tiresome game punctuated by amazingly-close misses and some stunning goals. Captain /co/lette's purple and Tucker's blue conditioning kept /co/ from capitalizing on many of their opportunities, while /sci/ used the arcane electrical science of Nikola Tesla to take an early lead. But /co/ pulled ahead with a surprising, shocking, and wonderful free kick goal at the 92" minute thanks to Bill Nye fouling it up just outside the /sci/ box. Beating the odds and winning a game, /co/ has restored our faith in superheroes. Meanwhile, /sci/ proved that they still hadn't found a way to keep their experiments in divegrass from blowing up in their faces.

Matchday 2

Belief in superheroes and miracles paid off as /co/ secured their position in the knockout stage and Winter Cup as they defeated /pol/ in their home stadium. Despite the home court advantage and vastly superior conditions, /pol/ threw away the first half of the match on a defensive strategy that allowed The Flash and Archer, with assistance from /co/lette to score two uncontested goals. Doom Paul gave /pol/ some consolation at the close of the game, but it was too little, too late. /pol/ lost, and were now dependent on a /sci/ victory to keep them in contention.

Unfortunately for /pol/ and /sci/, Group H ended with /co/ and /ck/ on top and in the cup. Despite some terrible conditions for both teams, and Carl Sagan's lecture giving /sci/ a very early one goal lead, /ck/'s forwards overcame the blue defenders of /sci/ to cement their return to a major cup. Impressive performances by ace striker Nachos and a purple Perfect Coffee gave /ck/ the edge it needed to dice /sci/'s exhausted defense.

Matchday 3

With the group already decided, /co/ and /ck/ decided to rest two of its medal players and prepare for their games next weekend. Despite this, they were still able to score three impressive goals against a /ck/ team that seemed incapable of shooting on target or holding them back.

Played on probably the best pitch in the cup, this >just for fun match saw the return of the Bill formation and the 8-1-1 /pol/ blitzkrieg. Bill scored his first and last goal of the cup in this meaningless match. This match also cemented the death of /pol/ as a team, placing it on the same level as /tv/, /g/, and /c/.

Standings

Team Pld W D L GF GA GD Pts
Co icon.png /co/ 3 3 0 0 7 2 5 9
Ck icon.png /ck/ 3 2 0 1 7 4 3 6
Sci icon.png /sci/ 3 1 0 2 3 7 -4 3
Pol icon.png /pol/ 3 0 0 3 1 5 -4 0


/pol/ v /ck/

Stadium: Stadio Olimpico 17 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1691
Pol logo.png /pol/ 0–2 /ck/ Ck logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Goal 60'90+' Nachos



GK 1 JIDF
RB 23 Austrian Economics
CB 2 Red Pill
LB 13 Statist
DM 4 Mark O'Mara Substituted off 90+'
DM 27 Breivik Substituted off 90+'
RM 10 Jews
CM 29 Daily Reminder Booked 66' Substituted off 90+'
LM 88 Hitler
AM 14 Stormfront
CF 16 Doom Paul
Substitutions:
CM 17 Free Market Will Fix It Substituted in 90+'
DM 15 Kiker-chan Substituted in 90+'
DM 7 Nigel Farage Substituted in 90+'
Manager:
Cozmo !!7bij/P7BcwR
2013sc group h-pol ck.png
GK 1 Cast-Iron Skillet
RB 2 Roadkill Thread Booked 23'
CB 5 Milk Jar Substituted off 66'
LB 4 Vertical Recipes Substituted off 66'
DM 16 Masaokis
RM 18 Fridge Ketchup
AM 8 /ck/ Challenge
AM 11 Perfect Coffee Booked 11'
LM 3 Iron Chef Substituted off 66'
SS 9 Pink Himalayan Salt
CF 10 Nachos
Substitutions:
LB 14 Chicken Nugger Substituted in 66'
CB 15 Packet Ramen Substituted in 66'
LM 7 Gordon Ramsay Substituted in 66'
Manager:
TunaMerchant !!+U8b1gCk0rk

Man of the Match:
Nachos (/ck/)

Match Stats
3 (1) Shots (On Target) 5 (2)
2 (0) Fouls (Offside) 3 (1)
3 Free Kicks 2
0 Free Kicks scored 0
0 Corner Kicks 1
24 Interceptions 18
49% Possession 51%
83% Passes Completed 80%
8 Tackles Won 11
0 Saves 0

/co/ v /sci/

Stadium: Wembley Stadium 17 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1436
Co logo.png /co/ 2–1 /sci/ Sci logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
The Flash Goal 89'
Tucker Goal 90+5'
Goal 30' Nikola Tesla



GK 5 The Boulder
RB 16 Spider-man
CB 7 Hope Corgi Substituted off 64'
LB 13 Doom
CM 18 Dead Parents
CM 8 Sexism Substituted off 78'
CM 10 Coulson Substituted off 78'
RM 1 The Flash
AM 3 /co/lette
LM 21 Archer
CF 9 Tucker
Substitutions:
CB 0 Aku Substituted in 64'
CM 4 Your Favourite Series Substituted in 78'
CM 12 Brock Samson Substituted in 78'
Manager:
DocSax !!CZDGJzT39aK
Mantis !!JQtP16lnumY
2013sc group h-co sci.png
GK 16 Stephen Hawking
RB 6 >biology >hard science
CB 20 Sun of Fire/Ice
LB 21 God-Tier Major
DM 18 Richard Dawkins
DM 8 Carl Sagan
RM 13 Putnam Math Substituted off 64'
LM 7 Koala Face
AM 2 Not Science
AM 10 Nikola Tesla
CF 1 Bill Nye
Substitutions:
RM 14 Epicurus Substituted in 64'
Manager:
Aitor Karanka !!CmJjMKBhYyd

Man of the Match:
Tucker (/co/)

Match Stats
8 (6) Shots (On Target) 8 (4)
0 (0) Fouls (Offside) 5 (1)
5 Free Kicks 0
1 Free Kicks scored 0
6 Corner Kicks 2
19 Interceptions 26
47% Possession 53%
76% Passes Completed 82%
7 Tackles Won 7
3 Saves 3

/pol/ v /co/

Stadium: Stadio Olimpico 23 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1442
Pol logo.png /pol/ 1–2 /co/ Co logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Doompaul Goal 89' Goal 28' The Flash
Goal 34' Archer



GK 1 JIDF
RB 18 Fox News
CB 2 Red Pill Substituted off 86'
LB 23 Austrian Economics
DM 7 Nigel Farage
DM 27 Breivik Substituted off 68'
RM 10 Jews
CM 5 Penn Jillette Substituted off 71'
LM 88 Hitler
SS 14 Stormfront
CF 16 Doom Paul
Substitutions:
DM 15 Kiker Chan Substituted in 68'
CM 29 Daily Reminder Substituted in 71'
CB 28 Ben Garrison Substituted in 86'
Manager:
Cozmo !!7bij/P7BcwR
2013sc group h-pol co.png
GK 15 Jake The Dog
RB 13 Doom Substituted off 86'
CB 7 Hope Corgi Booked 53' Substituted off 68'
CB 16 Spider-Man Substituted off 86'
LB 10 Coulson
RM 4 Your Favourite Series (Cancelled)
CM 12 Brock Samson
CM 1 The Flash
LM 3 /co/lette
AM 8 Archer
CF 9 Tucker
Substitutions:
CB 0 Aku Substituted in 68'
RB 11 Frank Substituted in 86'
CB 2 Cyclops Substituted in 86'
Manager:
DocSax !!CZDGJzT39aK
Mantis !!JQtP16lnumY

Man of the Match:
Archer (/co/)

Match Stats
6 (4) Shots (On Target) 5 (3)
4 (0) Fouls (Offside) 3 (0)
3 Free Kicks 4
0 Free Kicks scored 0
3 Corner Kicks 0
21 Interceptions 19
51% Possession 49%
82% Passes Completed 78%
12 Tackles Won 11
1 Saves 1

/ck/ v /sci/

Stadium: Konami Stadium 23 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1330
Ck logo.png /ck/ 5–1 /sci/ Sci logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Nachos Goal 15'90'
Perfect Coffee Goal 19'34'
Pink Himalayan Salt Goal 54'
Goal 3' Nikola Tesla



GK 12 Sad Crab
RB 2 Roadkill Thread
CB 5 Milk Jar
LB 4 Vertical Recipes
DM 6 Alton Brown Substituted off 90+'
RM 3 Iron Chef Substituted off 69'
LM 7 Gordon Ramsay
AM 11 Perfect Coffee
AM 8 /ck/ Challenge
AM 9 Pink Himalayan Salt
CF 10 Nachos
Substitutions:
RM 22 Cooking With Dog Substituted in 69'
DM 17 Frugal Mode Substituted in 90+'
Manager:
TunaMerchant !!+U8b1gCk0rk
2013sc group h-ck sci.png
GK 16 Stephen Hawking
RB 20 Sun of Fire/Ice
CB 6 >biology >hard science
CB 11 Transhumanism
LB 18 Richard Dawkins
DM 9 Aquatic Hamster
DM 8 Carl Sagan
RM 14 Epicurus Substituted off 45'
AM 2 Not Science
LM 10 Nikola Tesla
CF 1 Bill Nye
Substitutions:
RM 13 Putnam Math Substituted in 45'
Manager:
Aitor Karanka !!CmJjMKBhYyd

Man of the Match:
Pink Himalayan Salt (/ck/)

Match Stats
14 (13) Shots (On Target) 8 (3)
2 (2) Fouls (Offside) 3 (0)
3 Free Kicks 2
0 Free Kicks scored 0
1 Corner Kicks 2
18 Interceptions 22
48% Possession 52%
75% Passes Completed 82%
4 Tackles Won 6
4 Saves 6

/co/ v /ck/

Stadium: Wembley Stadium 25 August 2013, 20:00 UTC Attendance: 1389
Co logo.png /co/ 3–0 /ck/ Ck logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Tucker Goal 58'
Colette Goal 68'
Cape Movie Hype Goal 74'



GK 5 The Boulder
RB 13 Doom
CB 0 Aku
LB 16 Spider-Man
CM 10 Coulson
CM 8 Sexism Substituted off 68'
CM 19 40 Cakes
RM 1 The Flash Substituted off 68'
AM 3 /co/lette
LM 21 Archer Substituted off 68'
CF 9 Tucker Booked 59'
Substitutions:
RM 17 Cape Movie Hype Substituted in 68'
LM 6 Alan Moore Substituted in 68'
CM 20 Win O' Thread Substituted in 68'
Manager:
DocSax !!CZDGJzT39aK
Mantis !!JQtP16lnumY
2013sc group h-co ck.png
GK 23 Vegan Shitstorm
RB 14 Chicken Nugger
CB 15 Packet Ramen Booked 51'
LB 4 Vertical Recipes
DM 16 Masaokis
RM 7 Gordon Ramsay
AM 18 Fridge Ketchup
AM 19 Sriracha Substituted off 68'
LM 20 Steak Thread
SS 9 Pink Himalayan Salt
CF 10 Nachos
Substitutions:
AM 8 /ck/ Challenge Substituted in 68'
Manager:
TunaMerchant !!+U8b1gCk0rk

Man of the Match:
/co/lette (/co/)

Match Stats
11 (8) Shots (On Target) 2 (0)
2 (0) Fouls (Offside) 2 (1)
2 Free Kicks 2
0 Free Kicks scored 0
2 Corner Kicks 0
26 Interceptions 25
50% Possession 50%
77% Passes Completed 74%
14 Tackles Won 5
0 Saves 5

/sci/ v /pol/

Stadium: Stadio Olimpico 25 August 2013, 20:30 UTC Attendance: 1394
Sci logo.png /sci/ 1–0 /pol/ Pol logo.png Scoreboard overlay.png
Bill Nye Goal 73'



GK 15 Secret Italian Supercat
RB 17 Saged Homework Booked 54'
CB 6 >biology >hard science
LB 20 Sun of Fire/Ice
CM 18 Richard Dawkins Substituted off 55'
CM 13 Putnam Math
AM 8 Carl Sagan
AM 2 Not Science
AM 9 Aquatic Hamster
SS 1 Bill Nye
CF 10 Nikola Tesla
Substitutions:
CF 7 Koala Face Substituted in 55'
Manager:
Aitor Karanka !!CmJjMKBhYyd
2013sc group h-sci pol.png
GK 3 Dorner
RB 28 Ben Garrison
CB 23 Austrian Economics
LB 13 Statist
DM 20 Obongo
RM 5 Penn Jillette
CM 14 Stormfront
LM 27 Breivik
RW 10 Jews
CF 16 Doom Paul
LW 88 Hitler
Substitutions:
None
Manager:
Cozmo !!7bij/P7BcwR

Man of the Match:
Bill Nye (/sci/)

Match Stats
6 (1) Shots (On Target) 1 (0)
1 (0) Fouls (Offside) 4 (1)
4 Free Kicks 1
0 Free Kicks scored 0
4 Corner Kicks 1
17 Interceptions 20
55% Possession 45%
81% Passes Completed 78%
10 Tackles Won 8
1 Saves 0