Wooden Spoon Match History

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At the end of every officially sanctioned tournament since the 2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup, retired legends of the cup congregate together to pit their aged skills against the team cursed with finishing last in the tournament, representing the unholy abomination ineligible board /trash/. Though they may have been iconic and household names in the past, these seniors have lost a lot of the flair and skill that made them famous to begin with. Nonetheless, with the guidance of hundreds of managers barking out messages in the form of memes in the Hitbox Smashcast Cytube chat, these aged heroes are proud to return to the pitch and churn out ninety solid minutes of fighting spirit every three months, though they tend to lose by double digits in each match.

After seventeen matches, /trash/ currently trails in the aggregate scoring by a score of 188-7, having failed to find the back of the net until The Flash scored from the spot against /k/ in Spring 2017. The Flash NEARLY scored against /n/ in Winter 2017, but his shot was cleared off the line. The first goal in PES was scored by Merzthony Bowtano against /mu/ in Summer 2017. The second goal in PES was a bicycle kick into the net from New Thread against /his/ in Spring 2018.

2016 4chan Spring Babby Cup

15 May 2016 /n/ N icon.png 11–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

I Like Trains Goal 9'19'53'
Bepsi Goal 14'17'
Baconrider Goal 22'26'49'58'90+4'
Hipster Fixie Goal 39'
Riggly Field
Attendance: Unknown

2016 4chan Summer Cup

14 August 2016 /pol/ Pol icon.png 17–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

Donald Trump Goal 5'15'25'45+5'55'69'
Moonman Goal 8'86'
Stormfront Goal 31'37'45+3'57'59'73'90+3'
Hitler Goal 44'
Jews Goal 51'
/new/remburg Field
Attendance: Unknown

2016 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

6 November 2016 /i/ I icon.png 14–0 Trash icon.png /trash/
Note: Played on PES 2013
Beatrice Goal 12'43'59'
/i/rene Goal 17'44'65'70'74'76'77'81'83' Booked 50'
Dungeonwaterway Goal 21'
Socket Error Goal 53'
PES 2013
Attendance: Unknown

2017 4chan Winter Cup

19 February 2017 /n/ N icon.png 18–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

Bullet Train Goal 8'12'25'30'34'37'48' Booked 90+2'
Based Tony Martin Goal 14'52'
Cycling Cap Goal 20'28'
User Was Hit By A Car Goal 32'56'79'
Trinidad Strong Goal 76'86'
I Like Trash Goal 83'90+1'
Schettino Booked 35'
Booked 23' Based God
Booked 37' User Was Warned
Booked 51' Kaiji
Red card 90+3' Dead Bart
Riggly Field
Attendance: 601

2017 4chan Spring Babby Cup

21 May 2017 /trash/ Trash icon.png 1–6 K icon.png /k/

Mormon Jesus Red card 6'
The Flash Goal 49' (pen.)
Goal 12'44'54'58'71'85' Zergface Sensible World of Soccer
Attendance: 480

2017 4chan Summer Cup

  • Note: /trash/ took on an Anthony Fantano theme due to him scoring a bizarre own goal and getting sent off in the same match against /d/. Coincidentally, /mu/ went on to finish last, so this game was fun as hell. The game was self-aware as fuck: There was another spaghetti own goal, Merzthony Bowtano scored right before Merzbow got subbed off, and the only /trash/ player who didn't get a rating was Anthony Fantano.
6 August 2017 /trash/ Trash icon.png 1–15 Mu icon.png /mu/

Merzthony Bowtano Goal 89' Goal 4'18'54' Michael Gira
Goal 6'14' Booked 51' MC Ride
Goal 24'45+2'68'71'87' Jeff Mangum
Scored 32' Pagethony Ninetano
Goal 47' Sufjan Stevens
Goal 77' Kanye West
Goal 90+1' Thom Yorke
Goal 90+3' Viper The Rapper
Riggly Field
Attendance: 900~

2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

5 November 2017 /ck/ Ck icon.png 18–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

Cock Sauce Goal 2'11'47'
(winning is a) /ck/ Challenge Goal 6'16'32'45+5'
Punished Coffee Goal 24'39'49'55'82'
Vegan Relegate Goal 37'
Fastfood Chocking Goal 45+1'53'64'70'
Sweet Sundae Relegation Goal 87'
Booked 45+1' New Thread Big Rig's Bar
Attendance: 856

2018 4chan Winter Cup

  • Note: /wg/ is the first and only team to earn a point in the group stages and play /trash/ in the same tournament.
25 February 2018 /wg/ Wg icon.png 13–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

Helios Goal 4'
Descartes Goal 13'19'
Comfy Goal 22'45+2'48'90+2'
Cunt Destroyer Goal 26'30'
Boss Nigger Goal 28'
Dank Papes Goal 36'
Orgy Dog Goal 57'78'
Headphone Girl Booked 57'
Booked 83' /wg/'s entire roster that spelled ROXANNE WINS FUCK YOU Mont Cervin
Attendance: Unknown

2018 4chan Spring Babby Cup

  • Note: In one of the most surreal Wooden Spoon matches ever, /trash/ actually managed to score in PES again, with New Thread bicycling it into the net to free himself. This success was popularly attributed to the /trash/ management setting their team formation to a big T, making /t/ (who had recently just been promoted) the captain, and putting Cory Baxter in the net.
20 May 2018 /trash/ Trash icon.png 1–13 His icon.png /his/

New Thread Goal 49' Goal 2'17'20'23' >Holy>Roman>Empire
Goal 12'27'31'34' Mongolian Horse Archer
Goal 15' Julius Caesar
Goal 63'71' Napoleon
Goal 79'90+1' Maoist Worst Nightmare
Riggly Field
Attendance: 303

2018 4chan Summer Cup

5 August 2018 /trash/ Trash icon.png 0–12 U icon.png /u/
Note: Played on PES 2015
Goal 6'27'37'49'52' Madokami
Goal 32'90+1' Black Sunshine
Goal 40'56'69' Teru Time
Goal 81'86' Purest Form of Love
Fuck you /mlp/ lol
Attendance: 384

2018 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

9 November 2018 /trash/ Trash icon.png Toy icon.png /toy/
Note: Played on PES 13. /trash/ won by summoning Exodia

2019 4chan Spring Babby Cup

2 June 2019 /trash/ Trash icon.png 0–10 Adv icon.png /adv/
Note: Played on PES 17.
Goal 16'38'44'73' Ask the Opposite Gender
Goal 20'57' Femanon
Goal 42'45+2'53' Suicide
Goal 89' How do I get gf?
Sad Panda Communal Faphouse
Attendance: 234

2019 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

8 November 2019 /aco/ Aco icon.png 5–0 Trash icon.png /trash/

Demencia Goal 54'
Janny Wakeman Goal 58'
Raven Goal 74'
Moomy Mercy Goal 85'89'
Signal Iduna Park

2020 4chan Spring Babby Cup

8 May 2020 /trash/ Trash icon.png 0–9 Trv icon.png /trv/

Goal 5'76'84' Couchsurfer Rapist
Goal 9'28'56'71' Rick Steves
Goal 13'48' Sex Tourist
Booked 34' Karl Pilkington
Emirates Stadium
Attendance: 246

2020 4chan Summer Cup

31 July 2020 /trash/ Trash icon.png G icon.png /g/

2020 4chan Autumn Babby Cup

6 November 2020 /trash/ Trash icon.png 4–10 K icon.png /k/

/wg/'s entire roster that spelled ROXANNE WINS FUCK YOU Goal 40'
F. Bertoglio Goal 57'90+2'
Placeholder Goal 86'
Goal 4'29'45' Zergface
Goal 35' Arkan and the Tigers
Goal 43' Lauri Törni
Goal 48'75'84' Cheeki Breeki
Goal 54' Jack Wilson
Goal 67' Simo Häyhä
Attendance: Unknown

2021 4chan Winter Cup

12 February 2021 /trash/ Trash icon.png 0–5 3 icon.png /3/

Goal 42'45'54' No >YOUR< Program Sucks
Goal 57' >blender
Goal 88' Muh Maya
Attendance: 292