2014 4chan Winter Cup Group G

Summary

Matchday 1

A match dominated offensively by /wg/, but with some great counter-goals by /ck/'s well-supported forwards that highlighted the differences between a team-based offense with much passing and styling and a player-based offense where one or two speedy fuckers break through the defensive line and beat the goalie. /ck/ took an early lead with the cheese-stained shoes of Nachos, but Cunt Destroyer proved that he was still capable of destroying cunts by immediately equalizing and seizing the lead. The match would go back and forth through the second half, with impressive goals by Space Cat and Perfect Coffee as /ck/'s defense fell apart and >Tipping proved he didn't deserve any tips after all. Still, a 3-3 tie game seemed like the final result, until Boss Nigger scored a one-in-a-million goal at 91' with three minutes to go, and /wg/ shutting down /ck/'s attempts to equalize. A well-fought match between two very strong teams.

/vr/ seemed like it would be a challenge to play against, taking the first goal of the game and keeping up strong offensive pressure through the first half. Unfortunately, their poor conditioning told in the second half as Couchsurfer Rapist ran right through their defense and took the first hat trick and double brace of the cup. /vr/ had a few good scoring chances spoiled by posts and Darien Gap, while 7000 Skeletons proved that you shouldn't send an undead to do a man's job. A complete defeat on the part of /vr/, it's hard to see /ck/ overcoming /trv/ in their matchup.

Matchday 2

Once a cup champion, /wg/ has found itself struggling for quite some time. And in this match, against a /trv/ that has been climbing up the ranks, they were found wanting. /wg/ forwards Cunt Destroyer and Desktop Thread made some early shots in the first half, but found themselves stopped by the impassable reaches of Darien Gap. A complete blowout of this once-storied team was led by Superpornowat Farangabang at 24', when Couchsurfer Rapist managed to get a thruball to the newhalf striker. Throughout the game, /wg/ found itself struggling for possession of the ball and /wg/'s only decent goalie, Bliss, in Blue conditioning, could do nothing to stop /trv/'s shots. /wg/ survives thank to their last-minute victory over /ck/ last week, and could return to the Round of 16 if /ck/ loses to /trv/ next week, a victory which seems sure to happen.

Two teams took to the field with a field of blues, greens, and purple, with shit conditions limiting the ability of both /ck/ and /vr/, but moreso on /ck/, to sub their players and alter their strategy. A sleepy first half, accompanied by a sleepy commentator, ended with /ck/ captain Nachos styling around 4 defenders and scoring a last-minute goal in injury time after being denied by /vr/'s half-Red defensive line earlier in the game. Fellow /ck/ forward Pink Himalayan Salt would get another goal for /ck/ at 59'. While /vr/ would answer with their own point midway through the second half, /ck/'s Perfect Coffee sealed their fate with a third goal for /ck/.

Matchday 3

Though there was a sliver of possibility that /trv/ could be knocked out of the sky, it was highly unlikely that /ck/ with a Red Darien Gap in the goal. Still, a terrible misstep by /ck/ saw a Purple Cast Iron Skillet sit in and give up a goal, prompting an immediate sub for Fatty McAutism despite the poor conditioning of Couchsurfer Rapist. With that goal essentially handed to /trv/, Sex Tourist's exploitation of a trollposting rebound and a panicking Fatty put /trv/ two up at the half. Darien Gap proved impassable to Pink Himalayan Salt, Nachos, and Perfect Coffee through the first half, but finally saw their efforts pay off as Perfect Coffee's caffeine content finally energized /ck/. Pink Himalayan Salt tied the game with twenty-five minutes to go, but the stimulation wasn't enough, and /trv/'s domination of Group G would be confirmed. This tie threw /vr/ out of contention, but /ck/'s fates would rest on /vr/'s victory.

A forced restart by a crashing PES2014 led to a complete scrambling of conditions that would lead to a major advantage for /wg/. With new conditions, /wg/ dominates a game they were expected to dominate, and knock /ck/ out of the Cup with their victory.

Table

Team	Pld	W	D	L	GF	GA	GD	Pts
/trv/	3	2	1	0	9	3	6	7
/wg/	3	2	0	1	6	6	0	6
/ck/	3	1	1	1	8	7	1	4
/vr/	3	0	0	3	2	9	-7	0

/wg/ v /ck/

Stadium: El Monumental

15 February 2014, 19:40 UTC

Attendance: 742

/wg/ 4–3 /ck/

Cunt Destroyer  32', 53' Spacecat  71' Boss Nigger  90+1'		29' Nachos  59' /ck/ Challenge  81' Perfect Coffee
	Assists
Rainmeter  32' Spacecat  53', 90+1' Cunt Destroyer  71'		29', 81' Pink Himalayan Salt

Kit: Dolla Dolla Bill Y'all Fuckscapes  67' Dark Side of the Moon  67' Minimalistic Rainmeter  67' Boss Nigger Desktop Thread Headphone Girl Descartes Cunt Destroyer Spacecat Substitutions: GRAHHHNBBBLAHAH  67' Ronald Raygun  67' Once There Was A Tree  67' Manager: StoneyDucky !!DYDlR77coGn

Kit: >tipping Vertical Recipes Al/ck/oholic Milksteak Alton Brown  67' Sriracha Perfect Coffee  35' /ck/ Challenge Cooking With Dog Pink Himalayan Salt Nachos Substitutions: Masaokis  67' Manager: AntacidCanada !!bxgf5+DXvbZ

Man of the Match: Cunt Destroyer (/wg/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 57 43 Shots (on target) 12 4 (10) (3) Fouls (offside) 3 1 (3) (0) Corner Kicks 2 1 Free Kicks 1 3 Passes completed (%) 85 88 Crosses 4 1 Interceptions 7 7 Tackles 5 2 Saves 0 4

/trv/ v /vr/

Stadium: Estadio Urbano Caldeira

15 February 2014, 20:20 UTC

Attendance: 726

/trv/ 4–1 /vr/

Couchsurfer Rapist  8', 58', 85', 90+2'		5' >filters
	Assists
Sex Tourist  90+2'		5' Kacho Arino

Kit: Noobius Expedia Sickof Murrica Nigel Roppongi  73' James Vagabond Boris Transsiberyan Squat Toilet  73' Karl Pilkington Luke Skyscanner  73' Superpornowat Farangbang Couchsurfer Rapist Sex Tourist Substitutions: Billy Bogan  73' Neckbeard Teefle  73' Desperate Weeaboo  73' Manager: MauledByTheTigers !!jawkONBJmdi

Kit: 7000 Skeletons Greedy Reseller Mame Osamu Sato Cockroaches Exploding Knees Pat Lawlor  73' Vile >filters Kacho Arino Doomguy Substitutions: My Dad  73' Manager: Skywelker !!HCdeiPpkdHl

Man of the Match: Couchsurfer Rapist (/trv/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 45 55 Shots (on target) 8 6 (7) (2) Fouls (offside) 0 1 (0) (0) Corner Kicks 3 0 Free Kicks 1 0 Passes completed (%) 78 88 Crosses 3 1 Interceptions 6 13 Tackles 7 5 Saves 1 4

/wg/ v /trv/

Stadium: Estadio Urbano Caldeira

21 February 2014, 19:40 UTC

Attendance: 576

/wg/ 0–3 /trv/

		25' Superpornowat  45+2' Sex Tourist  72' Couchsurfer Rapist
	Assists
		25', 45+2' Couchsurfer Rapist  72' Sex Tourist

Kit: Bliss GRAHHHNBBBLAHAH Astroswag Keep Calm  72' Rainmeter Boss Nigger Desktop Thread  72' Headphone Girl Descartes Cunt Destroyer Spacecat Substitutions: Ronald Raygun  72' Original Content  72' Manager: StoneyDucky !!DYDlR77coGn

Kit: Darien Gap Sickof Murrica Itsa Slowboard Billy Bogan Boris Transsiberyan Amsterdam Stonerbro  78' Karl Pilkington Sven Scandiboo  78' Superpornowat Farangbang Couchsurfer Rapist Sex Tourist Substitutions: Desperate Weeaboo  78' Neckbeard Teefle  78' Manager: MauledByTheTigers !!jawkONBJmdi

Man of the Match: Couchsurfer Rapist (/trv/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 49 51 Shots (on target) 4 5 (2) (4) Fouls (offside) 2 0 (2) (0) Corner Kicks 1 0 Free Kicks 0 2 Passes completed (%) 83 89 Crosses 2 0 Interceptions 2 8 Tackles 6 2 Saves 1 2

/ck/ v /vr/

Stadium: Stade de France

21 February 2014, 20:20 UTC

Attendance: 553

/ck/ 3–1 /vr/

Nachos  45+2' Pink Himalayan Salt  60' Perfect Coffee  79'		66' Vile
	Assists
Sriracha  79'		66' Kacho Arino

Kit: Cast Iron Skillet Ramen Poorfag Al/ck/oholic >beans in chili Weber Cooks  70' Alton Brown  70' Fridge Ketchup  70' Perfect Coffee /ck/ Challenge Pink Himalayan Salt Nachos Substitutions: Sriracha  70' Gordon Ramsey  70' Masaokis  70' Manager: AntacidCanada !!bxgf5+DXvbZ

Kit: Powerglove Osamu Sato Kirby Vectrex Mame Cockroaches >filters  45' Not Retro Vile Kacho Arino Doomguy Substitutions: My Dad  45' Manager: GoldenComrade !IPeDo/xYlk!!Gmegt/8rzZc

Man of the Match: Pink Himalayan Salt (/ck/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 50 50 Shots (on target) 7 6 (4) (3) Fouls (offside) 1 1 (1) (0) Corner Kicks 0 2 Free Kicks 1 1 Passes completed (%) 83 82 Crosses 3 2 Interceptions 10 6 Tackles 3 1 Saves 1 0

/trv/ v /ck/

Stadium: Estadio Urbano Caldeira

23 February 2014, 19:00 UTC

Attendance: 782

/trv/ 2–2 /ck/

Couchsurfer Rapist  16' Sex Tourist  43'		51' Perfect Coffee  65' Pink Himalayan Salt
	Assists
		51', 65' Nachos

Kit: Darien Gap Sickof Murrica James Vagabond Nigel Roppongi  82' Boris Transsiberyan  82' Neckbeard Teefle Karl Pilkington Luke Skyscanner  82' Superpornowat Farangbang Couchsurfer Rapist Sex Tourist Substitutions: Dougie Canuckflag  82' Itsa Slowboard  82' Desperate Weeaboo  82' Manager: MauledByTheTigers !!jawkONBJmdi

Kit: Cast Iron Skillet  16' Vertical Recipes Roadkill Thread  82' >beans in chili Alton Brown  82' Gordon Ramsey Sriracha Perfect Coffee /ck/ Challenge Pink Himalayan Salt Nachos Substitutions: Fatty McAutism  16' Masaokis  82' Milksteak  82' Manager: AntacidCanada !!bxgf5+DXvbZ

Man of the Match: Couchsurfer Rapist (/trv/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 46 54 Shots (on target) 5 6 (5) (4) Fouls (offside) 1 0 (0) (0) Corner Kicks 2 2 Free Kicks 0 1 Passes completed (%) 79 82 Crosses 2 3 Interceptions 8 10 Tackles 2 4 Saves 2 3

/vr/ v /wg/

Stadium: Estadio da Luz

23 February 2014, 19:30 UTC

Attendance: 762

/vr/ 0–2 /wg/

		16' Spacecat  59' Headphone Girl
	Assists

Kit: Powerglove Kirby Mame Greedy Reseller Vectrex Nwabudike Morgan Kinaman88 Vile Doomguy Kacho Arino >filters Manager: GoldenComrade !IPeDo/xYlk!!Gmegt/8rzZc

Kit: Dolla Dolla Bill Y'all GRAHHHNBBBLAHAH Dark Side of the Moon Minimalistic Rainmeter Headphone Girl Boss Nigger Colorsplash  66' Descartes Spacecat Cunt Destroyer Substitutions: Original Content  66' Manager: StoneyDucky !!DYDlR77coGn

Man of the Match: Spacecat (/wg/)

Match Stats
Possession (%) 51 49 Shots (on target) 4 6 (3) (4) Fouls (offside) 1 1 (0) (1) Corner Kicks 0 1 Free Kicks 1 1 Passes completed (%) 86 85 Crosses 1 4 Interceptions 4 9 Tackles 0 2 Saves 2 2