Difference between revisions of "Rigged Wiki:Players of the week"

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*[[Rigged wiki:Players of the week/2017|2017 archive]]
*[[Rigged wiki:Players of the week/2017|2017 archive]]
*[[Rigged wiki:Players of the week/2018|2018 archive]]
*[[Rigged wiki:Players of the week/2018|2018 archive]]
==February==
*[[Rigged wiki:Players of the week/2019|2019 archive]]
===Wednesday, 13th of February===
==April 2023==
===Sunday, 23rd of April 2023===
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
|-
|-
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:POTW_Hitler.jpg|350px]]
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:Triforce_POTW.png|350px]]
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''Hitler''' {{team away|pol}}
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''▲ ▲ ▲''' {{team away|b}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" | {{Position|CMF}}
| width="80%" | {{Position|CF}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Build:</b> 180cm, 66kg
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Player Skills:</b> {{tt|S03| Marseille Turn}}, {{tt|S08|Long Range Drive}}, {{tt|S12|First-time Shot}}, {{tt|S14|Weighted Pass}}, {{tt|S16|Outside Curler}}, {{tt|S26|Captaincy}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Playing Style:</b> Box to Box
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | ▲
|-
▲ ▲? LOL RETARD
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | Germany was [[2017 4chan Autumn Babby Cup Qualifiers|having trouble]], what a sad, sad story


Needed a new leader to restore its [[2013 4chan Winter Cup|former]] [[2014 4chan Spring Babby Cup|glory]]
▲▲▲? NEWFAG


Where, oh, where was he? Where could that man be?
Close that text document, retard, you're in the presence of one of the old guard.
 
We looked around -- and then we found -- the man for you and me!
 
...in any case, it may not be springtime, but /pol/ is back! And there's no better striker to herald the return of a /pol/arizing stalwart than the Führer himself. After all, at a time where Moonman was too busy leading right-wing death squads to sniff out undesirables in the locker rooms, and Alex Jones was too busy being addled by the chemicals in the water to shoot on target, who persevered and brought home the trophy for /pol/?
 
Natürlich niemand anderes als der Führer.
 
Behind Hitler all /pol/ follows.
 
Before him, the [[2020 4chan Winter Cup|Winter Cup]], and tomorrow, the world.
|-
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
|}
 
==March==
===Saturday, 23rd of March===
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
|-
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:POTW_nyps.jpg|350px]]
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''No >YOUR< Program Sucks''' {{team away|3}}
|-
| width="80%" | {{Position|CMF}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Build:</b> 175cm, 66kg
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Player Skills:</b> {{tt|S08|Long Range Drive}}, {{tt|S13|One-touch pass}}, {{tt|S24|Track back}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Playing Style:</b> The Destroyer
|-
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | Imagine being scored on by a non-medal CMF. What kind of shitty team would let that happen to them?
Now imagine getting scored on by said non-medal CMF ''thrice''.
Fortunately, there's no player in a better position to shit on other teams than renowned /3/ shitposter '''No >YOUR< Program Sucks''', and [[2019 4chan Winter Cup|this Winter]], he did just that. Part of /3/'s ironclad midfield, this player has somehow managed to transmute years of experience in shitflinging about software into shots flung cleanly into the opposing goal. With a brace against /pol/, an extra goal against /tg/, and a quick three-minute shot during a quarterfinal rematch against the ledditors, it's the shitposter's record that best shows off the lethality and tightly-controlled midfield of this Winter's /3/, where seemingly any player could score and any forward drive was a threat — one that took the eventual cup winners [[:/gd/]] in order to dismantle.
While /3/ may not have taken the star, they came damn well close, and it's in great part thanks to this embodiment of /3/. Which, by the way — wasn't made in Maya (it's shit), or 3DS Max (it's shit) — it was made in Blender.
You heard me right, get fucked. And that goes for any of you shit Babby-ass teams still doubting /3/ after this run — {{tt|next [[2019 4chan Summer Cup|Summer]], he'll be shitting on you.|Tonight, on Cup taglines that didn't age well...}}
|-
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
|}
==July==
===Tuesday, 2nd of July===
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
|-
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:POTW_macgyver.png|350px]]
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''MacGyver''' {{team away|diy}}
|-
| width="80%" | {{Position|CF}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Build:</b> 185cm, 80kg
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Player Skills:</b> {{tt|P03|Speeding Bullet}}, {{tt|S06|Scotch Move}}, {{tt|S12|First-time Shot}}, {{tt|S16|Outside Curler}}, {{tt|S24|Track back}}, {{tt|S26|Captaincy}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Playing Style:</b> None
|-
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | I have a home project that requires goals, goals, and more goals. I can't just go out and buy them like some teams, so how am I going to get these goals? Just become '''MacGyver''' of course!


When scoring is down and the project is looking like a lost cause, there is no one else to turn to other than [[:/diy/]] idol MacGyver, and he proved in Spring that there is no one else better to turn to when the job calls for receiving  masterclass passes and putting them in the back of the net. Leading the /diy/ attack, he proves that you don't need a gun to have explosive firepower, as his pace and speed down the field allowed him to rack up 6 goals in 4 matches, as well as assisting on one of the other 2 goals for /diy/. Without MacGyver, /diy/ would have lacked creativity throughout the entire pitch, and lacking creativity on /diy/ is a surefire way to get you laughed all the way back to the department store.  
Newfags can't triforce, but Triforce can score — he's done it 90 times in fact, making him one of the most prolific strikers in 4Chan Cup history, and that 100-goal club is only getting closer.  


While MacGyver and the rest of /diy/ have proven they still have what it takes to make a high-quality model football team after a 3-and-a-half-year trip to the hardware store, they were unfortunately dismantled by an even bigger underdog in [[:/i/]], in what was a stellar match that resulted in penalties after MacGyver's 2 goals and converted penalty in the shootout proved not to be enough for the job. Ultimately, Blacksmith missed the deciding penalty, and /diy/ fans everywhere are calling for his forge to be removed because his metalworking has proven to be shit.  
A mainstay of his board's roster for over a decade, Triforce has been up front and bashing in goals just about as long. Known for his aggressive playstyle and penchant for keeping /b/ in the game no matter what, he's always been joined by fellow striker #REKT up front for the side. But when it comes to testing those fucking newfag defenders, there's only one nigger for the job. Gold or Silver, he'll flex his goal-scoring skills and his triforce on you all the same.


Be on the lookout for MacGyver [[:2019 4chan Summer Cup|this Summer]], as the main handyman looks to keep /diy/ elite, no matter how many hours he'll have to spend tinkering in his workshop to get the best team on the pitch.
Lurk for another decade and you might learn how to finally into triforce, but while you do that, Triforce will be making sure you and your team look like the dumbest motherfuckers for years to come.
|-
|-
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
|}
|}


==August==
==April 2022==
===Sunday, 11th of August===
===Wednesday, 1st of April 2022===
 
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
|-
|-
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:POTW_sadpanda.png|350px]]
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:Eggum.png|350px]]
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''Sad Panda''' {{team away|h}}
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''Eggman''' {{team away|egg}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" | {{Position|GK}}
| width="80%" | {{Position|GK}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Build:</b> 185cm, 82kg
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | I've come to make an announcement:
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Player Skills:</b> {{tt|S21|GK Long Throw}}
|-
| width="80%" style="font-size: 90%;" | <b>Playing Style:</b> Offensive Goalkeeper
|-
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" |There's a question that's dogged both /h/ newfags and frustrated Cup strikers forever -- how the ''fuck'' do I get past this goddamn panda?<br />


Known as the biggest and most reliable index for drawings of all sorts, exhentai, more popularly as the '''Sad Panda''', was beloved among all [[:/h/]] for hosting all their favorite fetishes and art with decades' worth of material. Then, tragedy struck: a new sticky on /h/ told users to backup material on Sad Panda immediately due to new laws in the {{tt|Netherlands|exhentai's long-time host}}. Users panickedly scrambled to backup everything they could, but -- there's only so much you can save in twelve hours. Though a backup eventually saved everything, the panic and dread that comes from losing the original and having to save so much could not dissipate so easily.<br />
Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, he took his hedgehog fucking quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife and he said his dick was "this big" and I said "that's disgusting".


So how did this carry over to the pitch? For their final group stage match against [[:/g/]], Sad Panda became an AMF and a gold medal in honor of his many years of service, and just like that PES found a way to reward him.<br />
So I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick, its the size of this walnut except way smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right baby, all point, no quills, no pillows, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong.


With a free kick opportunity just outside of the box, the panda put it right into the back of the net, sending /h/ fans into a frenzy, with their lament momentarily forgotten, and the joy of a divegrass miracle filling their hearts. You'd be hard-pressed to write a better doujin {{tt|plot|lel}} than that.
He fucked my wife so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth. That's right this is what you get, MY SUPER LASER PISS. Except I'm not pissing on the Earth, I'm gonna go higher, I'M PISSING ON THE MOON. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT OBAMA, I PISSED ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT!


But as /h/ fans blew their collective load for the Panda goal, so, it seems, did /h/ -- when the Panda let a heart-breaking goal past him in the last minute of eggsdra diem, /h/’s loss in the [[2019 4chan Summer Cup knockout stage|Round of 16]] was sealed, capping off /h/’s emotional cup run. No matter how sad this made the panda, /h/ fans surely will still love him all the same.<br />
You have twenty-three hours before the piss drop-el-ets hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my fucking sight, before I piss on you too.
 
Watch the [[2020 4chan Winter Cup|Winter Cup]], coming to a backup save near you soon, to see if /h/ can penetrate the field harder next time!
|-
|-
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
|}
|}


==December==
==May 2022==
===Monday, 30th of December===
===Saturday, 7th of May 2022===
 
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
{| width="100%" style="background: transparent; margin: 5px;"
|-
|-
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:POTW_nachos2.jpg|350px]]
| rowspan="6" width="20%" style="padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 10px;" | [[File:Nukedhi.jpg|350px]]
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''Nachos''' {{team away|ck}}
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 180%; padding-top: 5px;" | '''Nuclear Gandhi''' {{team away|vst}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" | {{Position|CF}}
| width="80%" | {{Position|AMF}}
|-
|-
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | If you doubt the power of the Cup to create stories all its own, allow me to tell you the story of a certain insane Mexican.  
| width="80%" align="justify" style="font-size: 90%;" | The devastating, precise strikes on your goal aren't the result of a programming error, oh no.
 
It was one day, as a man with a grand sombrero of melted cheese trudged through the searing North American wilderness, that a mirage appeared before his eyes. None alive now know if it was merely the heat of the midday desert sun, or the dwindling bottles of tequila hooked to his belt. But as the man was urged on by a buffering vision of a German in a winter hat, he would soon find himself at the foot of a grand stadium.  
This is Nuclear Gandhi, hailing from one of the most iconic strategy games, and just because he's not /vst/'s Captain -or even a striker for that matter- doesn't mean he won't put up 3 goals while still also lending his support to other /vst/ players with attentive passing and clever decision-making. With enough long-range shooting capability to make the average late-game military blush, Gandhi is a threat at any point in the match.
 
With his stomach nearly empty and his life fading, he came to in a locker room lined end to end with culinary delights. A sample here of {{tt|fast food|for him, it was the McChicken}}, a sip of perfect coffee, an exquisite braise of pork ribs, and, as luck would have it -- some good old-fashioned 'go 'za. Though the players assembled were clueless as to why a seemingly random immigrant had found their way into the team lunch, it so happened that they were currently in the market for an eleventh player.  
The players challenging must Gandhi fear and respect him. One little act of aggression and it's all-but-certain destruction for your defenses. Even if you manage to pressure him and shut him down in the midfield, he'll still support /vst/'s two Silvers well enough to make them plenty dangerous threats on their own.  
 
They were not prepared for this man to lead them nearly to great victory, nor for him to outscore everyone else. Or for the fans to constantly demand back his food-tipped hat, so they could celebrate to the ciocarlian fanfares that accompanied his goals. Nor did they expect this man to lead them through their highs and lows, to [[Curses#Curse of Third Place|break the most eldritch of curses]], or stay as long as he did.  
So go ahead and prepare all your tactics and plans all you want, but this Indian leader will out-science you, out-strategize you, and most importantly, out-nuke you.
 
A moment of silence, Cup fans, for '''Nachos''', one of the old greats. Though mysterious circumstances involving {{tt|Mexican weed|Thanks Sou}} took him away from us all too soon, may his memory serve as a reminder that in the Cup, players need not to be born great, if they can be made great.
You'll wish it was just an urban legend when you play /vst/ and an angry Nuclear Gandhi.
|-
|-
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''
| colspan="3" align="right" | '''[[:Rigged Wiki:Players of the week|Archive]]'''

Latest revision as of 21:08, 23 March 2024

This is the front page of Player of the Week's archive, a near-annual (formerly weekly but not since like 2014) piece featuring a player of the moment. New articles come whenever they are written by the community. Feel free to submit a piece; contact User:F4r. This page contains all articles from the current year. Here are links to all articles from past years:

April 2023

Sunday, 23rd of April 2023

Triforce POTW.png ▲ ▲ ▲ B icon.png /b/
  CF
▲

▲ ▲? LOL RETARD

▲▲▲? NEWFAG

Close that text document, retard, you're in the presence of one of the old guard.

Newfags can't triforce, but Triforce can score — he's done it 90 times in fact, making him one of the most prolific strikers in 4Chan Cup history, and that 100-goal club is only getting closer.

A mainstay of his board's roster for over a decade, Triforce has been up front and bashing in goals just about as long. Known for his aggressive playstyle and penchant for keeping /b/ in the game no matter what, he's always been joined by fellow striker #REKT up front for the side. But when it comes to testing those fucking newfag defenders, there's only one nigger for the job. Gold or Silver, he'll flex his goal-scoring skills and his triforce on you all the same.

Lurk for another decade and you might learn how to finally into triforce, but while you do that, Triforce will be making sure you and your team look like the dumbest motherfuckers for years to come.

Archive

April 2022

Wednesday, 1st of April 2022

Eggum.png Eggman Egg icon.png /egg/
  GK
I've come to make an announcement:

Shadow the Hedgehog's a bitch ass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That's right, he took his hedgehog fucking quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife and he said his dick was "this big" and I said "that's disgusting".

So I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick, its the size of this walnut except way smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right baby, all point, no quills, no pillows, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong.

He fucked my wife so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth. That's right this is what you get, MY SUPER LASER PISS. Except I'm not pissing on the Earth, I'm gonna go higher, I'M PISSING ON THE MOON. HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT OBAMA, I PISSED ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT!

You have twenty-three hours before the piss drop-el-ets hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my fucking sight, before I piss on you too.

Archive

May 2022

Saturday, 7th of May 2022

Nukedhi.jpg Nuclear Gandhi Vst icon.png /vst/
  AMF
The devastating, precise strikes on your goal aren't the result of a programming error, oh no.

This is Nuclear Gandhi, hailing from one of the most iconic strategy games, and just because he's not /vst/'s Captain -or even a striker for that matter- doesn't mean he won't put up 3 goals while still also lending his support to other /vst/ players with attentive passing and clever decision-making. With enough long-range shooting capability to make the average late-game military blush, Gandhi is a threat at any point in the match.

The players challenging must Gandhi fear and respect him. One little act of aggression and it's all-but-certain destruction for your defenses. Even if you manage to pressure him and shut him down in the midfield, he'll still support /vst/'s two Silvers well enough to make them plenty dangerous threats on their own.

So go ahead and prepare all your tactics and plans all you want, but this Indian leader will out-science you, out-strategize you, and most importantly, out-nuke you.

You'll wish it was just an urban legend when you play /vst/ and an angry Nuclear Gandhi.

Archive
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